I Was Not Magnificent
by Like A Dove
Summary: When Zuko first meets the waterbender with the scars, he's fascinated by her. His fascination quickly turns into something much more. Soon Zuko will have to confront his greatest enemy - himself. AU.
1. Prologue

**A/N:**

**Obviously I'm crazy for starting a new story days after I've wrapped up another one. Oh well. I'm eager to get the ball rolling on this one.**

**WARNING: this story will contain language, violence, sex, character death, and general fuckery. Rated M for those reasons.**

**A lot of you are used to the way I characterize Zuko and Katara. This is a completely different take on them. This is not a particularly happy story, but I still hope everyone enjoys it! Dark themed stuff is new for me, so I'm excited to put this out there and see what you all think.**

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><p>"Some men just want to watch the world burn."<p>

—Alfred Pennyworth, _The Dark Knight_

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><p>When Prince Zuko wakes up, he does not wake up slowly. His eyes merely open and suddenly he is fully alert.<p>

When Prince Zuko wakes up today, this morning feels no different from any other morning.

He turns a little in his bed and freezes when he sees a smooth expanse of creamy, white skin.

He sits up and sighs.

Moments later the girl rolls over, eyes fluttering. When she notices that he's awake she starts to smile.

"You can leave. Now." His voice is toneless, bored even.

The girl immediately gets out of the bed, gathers her clothes off of the floor and begins backing towards the door. "Thank you for your time, Prince Zuko." She bows her head.

He's picking at his fingernails. "Have a nice morning…"

He pauses, looks up at the girl. She has an expectant look on her face. She's cute, considering her class, with soft hair and pretty eyes. She'd been smart and clever. He'd liked that. And last night? It'd been fun, and Zuko had needed to have some fun. But none of that really matters because he still can't remember her name for the life of him.

"…you."

The girl turns as red as a tomato and high tails it out of his room.

Seconds later his sister walks in, hair down and dressed in her morning robe. She looks delighted. "A maid? Really Zuzu?"

He rolls out of bed and searches around the floor for the shirt he had been wearing last night. "Shut up."

"One day your prick will fall off from one of the diseases they'll give you."

He finds his shirt and pulls it over his head before glaring at his sister. "One day, Azula, I'll catch you with a stable boy and I will _never_ let you hear the end of it."

She lips twitch up in something that can barely be called a smile. "Except I have taste. But discussing your sexual exploits is not why I'm here. They found one."

He pauses while pulling his hair into a topknot. "One what?"

"A bender."

"Earth?"

"No."

"Air?"

"They're all still dead."

Zuko laughs. "How'd they manage to catch a waterbender?"

"It's rogue. They caught it on Ember Island, working with a bounty hunter."

He sticks his crown into his topknot before turning and facing his sister. "Male or female?"

"Female."

He crosses his arms and leans back against the bedpost. "And how did they manage to rope her into coming here?"

This time Azula really does smile, but in amusement. "She offered herself up. They were going to execute the bounty hunter she was with."

Zuko nods, and starts to make his way into his bathroom.

"There is _one _problem, though."

He raises an eyebrow in curiosity."Oh?"

"She's hideous. I don't see how we're going to get a nobleman to fuck her, much less marry her."

"What's wrong with her?"

Azula gestures to the left side of her face. "She's scarred, badly. Three gashes from just below her temple to her jaw. And they're bright red. Hideous."

"Well, maybe we can just put a bag over her head," he says from inside his bathroom.

He hears a snort and then the door to his room closing.

Zuko splashes water onto his face before surveying himself in the mirror. Two gold eyes stare back at him, along with pale skin, black hair, and aristocratic features. The people have been calling him beautiful ever since he hit fifteen.

Zuko frowns. What's there to smile about? It's just his reflection.

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><p><strong>AN #2:**

**I'm trying something new for this fic, I've decided to start replying to reviews. I haven't done it in the past for multiple reasons (okay, mostly laziness), but I'm going to now. So, uh, be prepared. I can be awkward ;)**

**Let me know what you think!**


	2. Pitiless

"See, I'm not a monster. I'm just ahead of the curve."

-The Joker, _The Dark Knight_

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><p>He first sees her in a little anti-chamber outside the kitchens.<p>

It's not like they could actually let her in the royal dining room.

They're waiting for breakfast to be served; Zuko, the girl, and his sister. Royal guards are lined along the doors in case the girl tries to make a run for it.

Personally, Zuko finds the girl _fascinating._ She has long, wavy brown hair that flows into her lap. She's parted it and draped it so that it completely covers the left side of her face. The one blue eye that's visible stares at the Fire siblings with surprising animosity.

She hasn't spoken yet, but Zuko is looking forward to whatever is bound to come out of her mouth. A girl who travels with bounty hunters is probably an interesting girl indeed.

An impatient huff comes from Zuko's right. Azula hates having to wait on her meals.

And finally the silence becomes too potent for his sister. "You look young," she drawls, addressing the girl sitting across from her. "How old are you?"

The girl glares unblinkingly at her. "Seventeen." Then she smiles—or, well, she half smiles, since Zuko can only see the right side of her face. "How old are _you_?" She throws the condescension right back at Azula.

If Zuko hadn't been watching her closely, Azula's irritated intake of breath would have been indiscernible.

"That hardly matters—"

"She's seventeen, too," Zuko answers on her behalf, barely repressing a grin. Watching his sister squirm is one of his few joys in life.

The visible side of the girl's face doesn't react. She remains blank.

Then the food is brought in.

It's a typical meal. There're fruits, dumplings, slices of fresh bread, and wine.

Two minutes later Zuko puts down his chopsticks. Watching the girl eat is too entertaining.

She's forsaken her utensils in favor of just using her hands, ripping off strips of bread and stuffing them into her mouth. It hits Zuko that this might be the first legitimate meal she's had in quite some time. There's a sudden flicker of pity for her, but the emotion snuffs out just as quickly as it ignited.

For awhile the girl seems oblivious to the two siblings watching her, but when she does she freezes. Then she continues with vigor. She looks them in the eye, tosses a dumpling in her mouth, bites into the fruit and then downs the wine in three gulps.

Zuko crosses his fingers and leans back into his chair. She's quickly becoming his new favorite person.

When she finishes her meal the girl flat out grins. She's mocking them, thinking that she's won this little game.

But Zuko is very good at games. He's been forced to master how they're played, or risk failure. Failure has never been an option for him.

He leans forward and props an elbow on the table. "Flip your hair over your shoulder."

Her grin immediately fades. "Why?" There's a slight tremor in her voice.

"So that we can see the rest of your pretty little face, of course."

She remains still.

"Move your hair. Over. Your shoulder." He's lowered his voice into something threatening.

She doesn't quite react the way he would like. Something sets in her jaw. "Or what?" she snaps. "You'll get one of your guards to do it for me?" She grabs a chopstick and breaks it in half between her fingers.

Every guard in the room moves their weapons into a 'ready' position.

Zuko isn't deterred. He holds up a finger and lets her see the flame at the tip of it. "No, I'll just singe it off myself."

All the blood drains from her face and after a moment the girl lets out a defeated sigh and flips the rest of her hair over her shoulder.

Azula doesn't react because she's already seen them, but Zuko finds himself drawing back, his eyes wide.

Azula was right, they're hideous.

Three thin, dark red streaks run from her temple to her jaw on the left side of her face, distorting her cheek and some of her hairline. A chunk at the end of her left eyebrow is missing and whatever or whoever gave her the scars just barely missed her left eye. Her left ear is completely mangled. Half of it is gone, torn off, Zuko suspects. He wonders if she can hear out of it.

For a moment all Zuko can focus on are her scars. He forgets that she has blue eyes, forgets that her hair is shiny and long, and forgets that she has a nice half smile. He even forgets the reason why she's there.

The sharp intake of multiple breaths as the guards get a good look at her face snap Zuko back to attention.

The girl has sunk low in her seat and ducked her head. Her bottom lip trembles, but there are no tears in her eyes. She doesn't look miserable. She looks ashamed.

The twinge of pity doesn't snuff out as quickly as it did before.

"You're dismissed," he says quietly. He snaps his fingers and two guards step forward and escort her out of the room.

Azula turns to face him, her eyes bright with maliciousness. "That wasn't very nice of you, Zuzu."

Zuko looks down at the food sitting on his plate. "No. It wasn't."

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><p>Zuko handles a lot of his father's paperwork. He's become strategic and knows his politics. It's an edge he forced himself to have over his sister.<p>

He's sitting at the desk in his office when there's a knock on the door.

"Come in," he calls, ink brush posed in his hand, eyes tracing over the documents in front of him. Someone is trying to con his father into giving more money to a certain district. Zuko wonders which method he should go about in scaring this man back into his place.

"The waterbending subject made an escape attempt, Prince Zuko. She has been caught and bound inside of her room."

Still staring at the document, Zuko sighs and stands up.

It's a bit of a walk to her room. She's in the servant's quarters, which is on the other side of the palace.

When he finally inters the servant's corridor, guards are swarming outside of her room. They part for him instantly and he opens up the door to the girl's room without bothering to knock.

She's sitting on her bed (stripped of all its linens), with rope wound around her wrists and attached to the bed posts on either side.

Her hair covers the left side of her face again.

Zuko closes the door behind him.

She had used her sheets and blankets to create a makeshift rope; it is still hanging out of the window.

Zuko approaches the window and looks down. More guards are pacing the ground directly under it.

"Impressive," he says, glancing back at her. "How far did you get?"

Her blue eye narrows in dislike. "Almost to the front gates."

Zuko straightens up a bit in surprise, before leaning back against the wall and pulling an apple out of a pocket in his robes. He rubs it against his shirt in order to shine it, then bites into it. He chews, then swallows.

"Well, thank you, waterbender, for pointing out the flaws in our security system. From now on I'll have guards outside of your door _and _under your window. If you try to escape again, I'll post guards _inside_ your room. I don't think you'd like that very much."

Zuko almost smiles at her reaction. She's _pissed._

He eats another bite of apple. "Don't get so angry. You volunteered for this, remember?"

"You were going to kill my friend!" she spits, struggling uselessly against her bonds. Zuko doesn't bother to tell her that tugging against the knots is only going to make the rope tighten around her wrists even more.

"_I _wasn't going to do anything."

She lets out a cry of frustration before slumping back against a bedpost. "Oh, quit stalling then! Torture me and get it over with!"

Zuko snorts and the girl pauses, raising an eyebrow at him.

"That's what you do, isn't it?" the girl continues, but there's confusion in her voice. "To get information?" She frowns when Zuko continues to look at her in amusement. Then she huffs and turns her head away.

"There's nothing you know that we don't already know."

She gives him a funny look, then rolls her eye and shakes her head, long hair swishing about her face. For a moment Zuko gets a glimpse at her scars, but in a flash they're covered up again.

He wonders how she got them.

He takes one last bite out of his apple before tossing it at her. It lands at her knee. He walks towards the door. "If you're polite to the guards they might untie you, waterbender."

She grumbles something under her breath.

Zuko pauses by the door and looks back at her. "What was that?" He lowers his voice, tries to intimidate.

"I have a name," she answers coldly.

"That's nice." Then he's exiting her room.

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><p>He twists in the air, falls towards the ground but catches himself on one hand. He tilts his body, supporting his weight on his right palm and manages to avoid a ball of intense heat that had been barreling towards his torso.<p>

He swirls his feet around in the air, sending whips of fire back at his opponent.

This man, one of his father's very own advisors, had disagreed with him last week at a war council.

Zuko had ended up winning the argument—verbally. But Ozai had still insisted that they settle their squabble the way that he always insisted things be settled: Agni Kai.

His fire whip lashes across the man's ribs, and the smell of burnt flesh permeates though the air.

Throughout this entire fight Advisor Jong has been giving Zuko looks of pure malice, more intense then Zuko is used to.

Zuko has a theory about this.

He's fairly certain that Jong is just upset that Zuko bedded his daughter three months ago but refused to acknowledge her at the royal family's next public function. Zuko had stated that Jong should just be glad that he had bothered to remember his daughter's name.

In retrospect, Zuko thinks that perhaps that wasn't the _best _thing to point out at the time.

Although he is clearly defeated, Advisor Jong clutches his side and struggles to get to his feet. His efforts prove pointless, and seconds later he falls to the ground and stays there, breathing heavily.

Zuko's heart starts to hammer in anticipation. He glances out of the corner of his eye at the crowd, sees his father watching with mild interest, sees his sister watching with absolute boredom, sees the majority of the palace scattered about the stands in this outdoor arena.

Zuko takes a deep breath, steadies his focus, calms his mind, and tells himself that there's no excuse to feel apprehensive. This is how all honorable Agni Kai's must end.

He darts forward, fire in his hand, and a moment all that can be heard is Advisor Jong's drawn out cry of pain. A fresh burn stretches across the man's left shoulder. Zuko hasn't struck his face. This is a kindness.

There's a polite scattering of clapping amongst the crowd and after a beat everyone gets up to resume their daily activities.

Zuko can feel the muscles in his legs start to quiver from exhaustion. The fight certainly hadn't been short.

Then there's a rush of voices, and Zuko turns his head to see the waterbender hurrying forward. They must have made her watch for educational purposes. Two guards instantly grab hold of her and yank her back, but not before she manages to kick one of them in the knee.

The look on her face is what surprises Zuko. It's one of horror and concern. For a brief moment he thinks it's for him, and he wonders if he was burned during the Agni Kai without realizing it and that's why she's s upset.

But then he follows her gaze and realizes she's concerned over Advisor Jong.

Advisor Jong, face tinged red from humiliation and pain, eyes the waterbender with distaste. Then he spits at her and Zuko catches the word "filth" coming out of his mouth.

The girl stills, visible blue eye widening. Then she bows her head, and her curtain of hair manages to hide the rest of her face from Zuko's view.

Zuko doesn't like it when people are rude to other people, especially people he's technically responsible for. So that's why, when he's walking past Jong in order to exit the arena, he sticks an ignited finger against Jong's right shoulder and _drags._

Now Advisor Jong's shoulders will match.

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><p>Zuko's whole body aches.<p>

They're in the same room they'd eaten breakfast in the other day.

His shoulders are stiff and his ribs are sore, but Zuko doesn't show any amount of discomfort as he sits down at the table. That was something he learned a long time ago—don't ever show pain.

Azula doesn't even spare him a glance as he pulls his chair up to the table. She looks bored and dispassionate. Nothing unusual.

Moments later the girl is escorted in. She looks better than she did this afternoon. The clothes she's dressed in are nice—not silk, of course, but they're made out of better material then those drab black things he had seen her wearing these past few days. Her hair looks shinier, and the dirt is gone from her skin. Azula has had her cleaned.

No one says anything and when dinner is served Zuko loses interest in the girl and focuses on his food. After today she will be his sister's problem. She's the one who's responsible for the benders, not him. It's not his job.

When Zuko is almost halfway done with his meal (and looking forward to taking an ice bath and then going to sleep) there's a clearing of a throat.

He glances up briefly, looks down, and then looks back up again.

The girl is staring at him fixedly, the food on her plate untouched.

Zuko manages to finish his meal with her eyes on him. Then he places his chopsticks onto his plate and meets her gaze. "What?"

She doesn't answer for a long time, content in just staring him down. When she finally does speak there is fury in her voice. "Why did you burn him?"

Zuko blinks. "Excuse me?"

She crosses her arms. "You had already defeated that man, so why did you burn him?"

Zuko manages not to let out an exasperated sigh. Figures someone like her would be upset over something as trivial as this. "That is how honorable Agni Kai's end." He leans back in his chair and raises an eyebrow at her. "Although, I doubt honor is something you really understand."

His wine leaps out of his glass and soaks into his lap. The waterbender is on her feet, visible blue eye wide and furious, with her fists clenched at her sides.

Zuko is too tired to care about wine having spilled onto his clothes, but _still._ She was getting on his last nerve.

Three guards move forward, prepared to grab her and drag her from the room, but Zuko holds up a hand and they still.

"I'll do it."

The girl shrinks back, immediately uneasy.

Good, she should be.

Anyway, this at least gives him an excuse to get out of here without having to deal with his sister.

He grabs her arms and tugs her out of the room, and is surprised when she doesn't put up any kind of struggle.

He thinks that maybe he should say something, threaten her, put her in her place. But he doesn't really _care_. He's so tired, and his body feels hot, like it always does after an intense fight. He just wants to lay down somewhere and close his eyes.

He finally reaches her room and lets go of her. He wouldn't have caught on that something was wrong if the tiniest wince hadn't crossed the right side of her face.

He looks down at her arm and sees a burn in the shape of his hand.

It's not that bad, she can run it under cold water for a little bit and it'll be fine. It's the fact that it's there in the first place that bothers him. Zuko frowns. He hadn't meant to do anything like that.

She doesn't make a noise, just inspects her arm with mild interest before letting it drop back down to her side. Zuko wonders if she is used to pain and if she, like him, has learned not to let on to it.

She's opening her door, the guards are taking their positions outside of her room, and for some unknowable reason Zuko finds himself speaking. "What's your name?"

She stops, turns, and eyes him. It's a calculating look, as if she's reevaluating him. "Katara."

Then she walks into her room and closes the door behind her.

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><p><strong>AN:**

**Thank you all so much for all the positive reviews! I'm glad everyone seems so interested in where this story is headed, and I hope you all still find it interesting after this first chapter.**

**Review and let me know what you thought! Also, mean!Zuko is deliciously fun to write.**


	3. Smug

_Well, I'm so above you_

_And its plain to see._

-"Lonely Boy", The Black Keys

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><p>He's playing pai sho with Mai, although he's not really paying attention. There's too much on his mind.<p>

There's a soft exhale. "I win. Again."

Zuko looks up to see Mai watching him.

"Why are we even bothering to play? You've let me win the past three games." There's no accusation in her amber eyes, just observation. It's times like these that Zuko is thankful for Mai's normal apathy.

With elegant fingers she begins to set up the board for a new game, barely acknowledging Zuko's one shouldered shrug.

"Did you hear?" she says softly, gaze still on the board. "They found Admiral Zhao's body this morning. Someone ripped him open and then dumped him in the sewers."

Zuko _has _heard, actually. It is all he is able to think about.

"Interesting," Mai continues, "that Admiral Zhao would show up dead right after he has a public disagreement with your father."

"Fascinating," Zuko agrees.

Mai looks up at him, gaze sharp. "Azula is livid."

Zuko almost smirks, but catches himself. "She should be."

Mai's eyes narrow a fraction, but she doesn't say anything more on the subject. She moves a tile instead.

Mai is extremely pretty; Zuko would have to be blind not to notice it. She and his sister's other friend, Ty Lee, were practically raised to be Fire Lady's. He was simply supposed to pick which one he liked more.

In the end he had picked neither. Besides, Mai and Ty Lee had always been more interested in each other than they ever had with him.

He looks back up. She's watching him again. "Your turn."

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><p>To Zuko, the royal dining hall has always seemed much too large, considering the size of his family. He supposes that a hundred or so years ago the royal family was much bigger, and that at one time this hall might have been full of people.<p>

Zuko briefly wonders what that might have been like before forcing himself to go back to his meal.

There are only three of them in this hall, now. Him, his sister, and his father.

The kitchen servants lining the walls, holding various dishes, don't really count.

There's a clearing of a throat, and both Zuko and Ozai look up to see Azula watching her father with a professional expression. She hasn't spared a glance for Zuko throughout the entire meal. Once again Zuko has to repress the urge to smirk.

"Father, we have another earthbender. Her parents sent her in this morning."

Ozai dabs at the corner of his mouth with a napkin and nods slowly. "Speaking of, Azula, there is something I wish to speak with you and your brother about concerning Project Kongzhi."

Azula goes deathly pale and her hand fists into the table cloth.

"From now on your brother will have full control over Project Kongzhi. You must find something else to do with your time."

She stiffens, eyes narrowing into slits. "Father," she says, voice sickly sweet, "are you absolutely _sure _that—"

"Do not question my decisions, Azula." Then Ozai returns to his meal.

Truthfully speaking Zuko has no desire to run Project Kongzhi, but that didn't really matter.

Azula turns and glares at him. It's the first time she's acknowledged him all evening. His sister might be a master firebender, but the look she sends him is cold, freezing fury.

Zuko smiles back at her.

For the very first time since they were children, for the very first time _ever_, really, Zuko has come head to head with his sister and he has _won_.

He hopes she's starting to see him as the threat that he is becoming.

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><p>He wakes up twice that night in order to vomit.<p>

As he's being sick he remembers something his Uncle Iroh told him before he disappeared: _"You are not like them, Prince Zuko. You might say the things that they say, you might do the things that they do, and you might walk where they walk, but you will never truly be who they _are_."_

Zuko groans and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. He squeezes his eyes shut, banishes the images swarming in his head.

Then he stands up straight and sucks in a deep breath.

The horror, the guilt, the disgust, he takes those feelings and tucks them away somewhere in the back of his mind. He decides to dwell on them no more.

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><p>Two days later he walks into a meeting room with a horrendous hangover. He had decided to belatedly celebrate his new position with his father the night before. It had been fun…at the time.<p>

Now he's paying the price.

He sees the waterbender lounging against a chair next to a shabby looking girl who looked about fifteen. The earthbender, he guesses.

He resists the urge to groan.

"Tea please," he mumbles to a servant before pulling out his chair at the head of the small table and sitting down.

He gets right down to business and pulls out their paperwork. Clearing his throat, he prepares himself to speak—

"Where's your sister?" the waterbender, no Katara, asks, eyeing him with a displeased expression.

"I've replaced her," Zuko grumbles. This irritating waterbender was probably going to ask him questions throughout this entire session. "I run Project Kongzhi now."

She blinks a blue eye at him. "I've yet to discover what that is."

The earthbender scoffs. "How do you not know? You _volunteered _for it."

Katara turns her head sharply, hair swinging, and glowers at the earthbender. "I was trying to help someone," she snaps. The earthbender's mouth turns into a snarl and the two girls glare at each other.

Zuko does not have the time nor the patience to put up with a cat fight.

The earthbender continues before he can cut in. "Well, get ready to be married off to some random dude and have bending babies, sweetheart."

Katara goes deathly pale. "I—what?" She looks back and forth between the earthbender and Zuko, awaiting confirmation.

Zuko says nothing. Zuko is _still _waiting for his tea.

There's silence for a long moment. Then the earthbender takes it upon herself to explain.

"Remember when Fire Lord Ozai burned down the Earth Kingdom three years ago with Sozin's Comet? I'm guessing the Fire Nation thought that that would solve their problems, demolishing what was left of the free world. It didn't. There have been riots everywhere, rebellions, little amateur armies raiding Fire Nation infantries, causing all sorts of trouble." The earthbender's eyes glaze over with a faraway look and Zuko realizes that for the first time that she is blind. Interesting.

"We all know that the Fire Nation can't have trouble," the girl continues, voice low. "But they've opted for a different tactic. Instead of destroying an entire race of people, they've—"

"Stop talking," Zuko says sharply. His tea is finally being set in front of him.

"What we're doing," he starts softly, "is allowing earth and, by extension, waterbenders to volunteer for our program. We find someone for them, a firebender—"

At the look in Katara's eye he frowns. "It's an extensive process. We won't just stick you with _anyone_."

Her panicked expression doesn't change.

"When the earth or waterbender and their matched firebender reproduce, if that child is an earth or waterbender then they will be put in a special training program—to hone their ability and to train them to be the best bender they can be."

The waterbender looks sick. "But, why would you—"

"Isn't it obvious?" the earthbender interrupts. "Theoretically speaking, in twenty, thirty, a hundred years from now the Fire Nation will have earth and waterbenders at its disposal. We're talking earth and waterbenders who have been raised since birth to think like a firebender, to think like a member of the Fire Nation. They _will be _a member of the Fire Nation, and they'll be fighting against all the rebellions, riots, and free thinkers until they're eventually crushed once and for all. Then the Fire Nation will essentially control the entire world. Just like they've always wanted," she finishes darkly.

"The Northern Water Tribe," Katara points out, and Zuko catches a note of desperation in her voice.

The earthbender answers that too. "Not too much of a threat if they eventually have to fight Fire Nation waterbenders."

"How many other waterbenders are there in this…thing? Besides me." Katara is staring at Zuko now, and he wishes beyond anything that he was back in his bed.

"That information I cannot disclose."

The waterbender frowns.

"You're probably the only one."

Zuko's hand clenches around his tea cup. This fifteen year old is grinding on his last nerve. "Thank you, earthbender. You can stop talking. Now."

"Fuck you," the girl snaps. "And why didn't you order tea for the rest of us? We're thirsty too, you know."

Katara winces and Zuko's left hand curls into the wood of the table, singeing it. "If you do not _shut up_, earthbender, then I will burn off your ears. Then you'll be blind _and _deaf."

The girl rolls her eyes. "I'm terrified."

There's a snap and a sharp cry of pain. A new welt now exists on the earthbender's neck, right under her right ear. She goes white as a sheet, but finally she's quiet.

Oddly, enough, Katara doesn't react at all.

"If you'll excuse me." Zuko stands up and is out of the room in seconds.

* * *

><p>He'd taken dinner in his room that night and was busy writing a letter when a knock at his door interrupts him.<p>

He's half tempted to send whoever it is away, but a second knock quickly comes and its more urgent then the first one.

Grumbling under his breath he gets up and answers the door.

It's the waterbender, ropes tied around her wrists and with three guards standing behind her.

Zuko sighs. "Did she try to escape again?"

The guard on the far right shakes his head. "No, sir. She wanted to speak with you."

"She wanted to speak with me," Zuko repeats in annoyance. They were disturbing him at this hour for _this?_

All of the guards look embarrassed. "She was…persistent," the one on the far right admits. Zuko notices that the guard's pants are soaked.

Katara is staring at Zuko's knees, but there's a self-satisfied half smile on her face.

Zuko leans against his door frame and waves the guards away. "Wait at the end of the hall. She and I will speak here."

When the guards are out of ear shot Zuko frowns at the waterbender. "What do you want?"

The girl's bottom lip is trembling, but her voice is steady. "I'm asking you to let me go."

He almost laughs. "No."

She nods as if she had been expecting that answer. "Then let the earthbender go. Keeping her here to do that…that disgusting 'project' is _wrong_. She's too young, she's—"

"Okay. You can both go."

Her head jerks up in surprise, but then her eye narrows. "What's the catch?"

"I decimate the Southern Water Tribe, as it serves no purpose for the Fire Nation and hasn't for decades. It's just a small group of women and children, no one will miss them. And besides, there are no more benders. Of course, there _were _rumors of a last waterbender who escaped but—"

Her visible eye fills with tears. "You know I'm from the Southern Water Tribe," she states, voice inexplicably sad and regretful.

He shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly. "Actually I didn't. But the truth is written all over your face."

She spits on him.

He doesn't strike her, though he'd like to. Instead he sweeps a foot under her right ankle and trips her. She falls backward onto the floor, landing hard on her tailbone.

"You know," he says casually, relaxing back into the doorframe, "I can't comprehend why you're making such a fuss. When you volunteered for your friend you signed a contract that stated everything that you would need to know. Did you not read it?"

The girl on the floor turns a bright, humiliated red. "I _signed_ it."

"So you just flat out didn't read it?"

She turns even redder.

His eyebrows furrow in confusion before he sighs in understanding. "You can't read."

She ducks her head so that he cannot see her face.

In Zuko's mind he knows that he should feel sorry for her. He _knows _he should. But he just doesn't.

"That is…unfortunate, waterbender. However, here in the Fire Nation we keep to our word. When we say we're going to do something, we do it, even if the circumstances are not playing out in our favor." He appraises her. She hasn't bothered standing up yet. "Do you have honor, Katara?"

Her head jerks up, and by the expression on her face she's clearly taken aback by his question. For a moment he spies her scars; they peak at him through strands of her hair. Then she's rearranging her locks and once again they are hidden from his view.

"More honor then you'll _ever _have," she whispers fiercely.

He ignores the jab and watches her as she gets to her feet. Without another word she turns and walks to the end of the corridor where her guards are waiting for her. Zuko stares after her briefly before stepping back into his bedroom.

* * *

><p>Zuko writes letters to his Uncle Iroh. He thinks that maybe one day he'll have the courage to send them. Maybe. Well, probably not.<p>

In tonight's letter he tells Iroh about his father's "breeding program" that he's taken over, how his sister hates him but what else is new, how father might actually approve of him, and about the water girl with the sad blue eye.

Uncle is perhaps the only person on this earth who Zuko thinks could understand his own thoughts. He could probably understand them better than Zuko himself.

As he scrolls the necessary characters across the parchment he freezes. As the ink dries he thinks about how the waterbender can't read or write. All she can do is sign her name. Illiteracy isn't uncommon, but Project Kongzhi requires its participants to be as competent as possible.

He lets the ink brush fall out of his hand, smearing ink onto his unfinished letter.

He's going to have to teach that irritating waterbender how to read.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

**Short chapters like this and the last one shouldn't be too common. The chapters should grow longer as the story progresses. Or, at least, they should. *glares at story outline***

***links fingers and laughs maniacally* Lots of mysterious stuff going on. And you won't find out everything for a little while. *laughs again***

**Thank you everyone for all of the feedback from last chapter! I love hearing what you all have to say! Please make sure to drop a review and let me know what you think! :D**


	4. Hostile

_A kick to the teeth is good for some_

_A kiss with a fist is better than none_

-"Kiss With a Fist" by Florence + The Machine

* * *

><p>Katara stares at the blank sheets of parchment, ink and brush with a nervous look in her one visible blue eye.<p>

Zuko is looking forward to teaching her about as much as she is looking to learning from him. In truth, he probably could've hired someone to teach her for him, but Zuko is a firm believer that if you want something done correctly then you might as well do it yourself.

They're in his office, she on the other side of his desk. Zuko clears his throat, sits up straight and prepares himself for a lot of speaking.

The waterbender eyes him warily.

"How many years of schooling have you had?" he asks, making eye contact.

She shrinks back slightly and bites her lip. "Um, well, a couple."

"A couple?"

Katara shifts a bit in her seat, clearly uncomfortable. "We didn't really have 'school' back home in the tribe. My Gran-Gran—" She instantly hushes up, as if she's already revealed much more then she would have liked.

"Your Gran-Gran?" Zuko prompts, leaning forward slightly.

She sighs. "I was being taught what I needed to know," is all she says before turning her head away and staring at the wall.

Zuko resists the urge to groan. She's already being difficult. "All right. When was the last time you received any sort of education?"

"I was seven."

Zuko nearly gets up and leaves the room. Instead he lets out a huff of dissatisfaction. "So essentially you're completely uneducated. Fantastic." He doesn't have the time or the desire to start teaching the girl other important things, like math, science, and history. Zuko is not a tutor.

The half of Katara's face that's visible looks furious. "I don't see why you're bothering to do this. I've made it seventeen years of my life without knowing how to read. I don't see the point in starting now."

Zuko can tell she's lying simply by the curious way she looks at the parchment and ink brush. But he decides not to comment on that in particular. "Really?" he drawls. "You don't think knowing how to read could have gotten you out of some unnecessarily sticky situations?" He gestures to the both of them casually.

"I resent that," she snaps before kicking the front of his desk in anger.

He smirks in amusement. "Knowing how to read is a useful ability." He taps a sheet of parchment. "Write down your name."

She looks at him for a long moment before leaning forward and picking up the ink brush. She draws out the characters for her name with ease, as if she's done it a million times before. When she's finished she looks up at him for reassurance.

Zuko just nods. "What else can you write?"

Then Katara shocks him by starting to write out numbers.

"You understand math?" he asks, trying hard and failing to hide his surprise.

She gives him a somewhat irritated look before shrugging. "I learned at a young age how to handle pricing. Money," she clarifies at the expression on his face. She crosses her arms and looks at him expectantly, but not before tucking her ink brush behind her right ear.

For a brief moment Zuko finds this action vaguely endearing but then he's clearing his throat and moving on.

"So you understand money," he says, more for his own confirmation.

"Yes. I wouldn't be alive if I didn't."

"But not the alphabet."

She pauses and then shakes her head.

Zuko nods once, then he's picking up his own ink brush and parchment. He writes out the alphabet for her, and occasionally he glances up to see Katara watching the paper and the movements of his hand with rapt attention.

At least, Zuko thinks, he has a willing learner.

* * *

><p>She's growing frustrated.<p>

He can tell by the way her pink tongue starts to jut out between her lips, and by the she leans so far over the desk that her hair starts to trail in and smear the ink.

Zuko is starting to understand that Katara doesn't like to fail, that she doesn't like not knowing what's going on.

For the past ten minutes he's been watching her. She's supposed to be copying down the alphabet for memorization and then writing out a couple of words he's given her. She got through copying the alphabet with flying colors, but the words are giving her trouble.

Then she does something that surprises him.

(He's starting to notice that she does that a lot. Surprise him.)

She sweeps her chocolate hair over her shoulder so that her entire face is revealed. Zuko's eyes immediately fixate on her scars; he can't help it.

But she doesn't seem to notice his staring. She taps the edge of the ink brush against her chin and then leans forward again. Now that her hair isn't blocking half of her face, Zuko can see that she's more distressed then frustrated.

She brushes the ink brush over the parchment a few more times; trying to correctly create the words he's given her, but to no avail.

She finally looks up at him and says something softly under her breath, so softly that he can't actually hear her.

"Come again?"

"I don't—I'm not getting it."

"I can see that."

The ink brush drops from her hand and lands onto the desk with a light splatter. Both of Katara's blue eyes are half lidded with disappointment. "You're wasting your time," she murmurs, unable to make eye contact.

Zuko sighs. This is going to be more difficult then he'd thought. He's confident in her abilities to learn (she doesn't seem _completely _dense), but Katara obviously isn't.

He stands up swiftly, causing the waterbender to jump slightly.

"Come on," he instructs, walking towards the door.

"Where?" she asks, and he can hear the suspicion in her voice.

"You need a break."

In reality, he needs one too, but he decides not to mention this.

He shakes his head when her guards try to follow. He can easily handle her in a physical confrontation and he can only imagine what a joke her bending must be.

When they entire the courtyard that leads to the palace gates she trots up from behind him in order to walk beside him.

"You know that I could escape, right?" She looks bewildered, and Zuko notes that she's covered the scarred side of her face with her hair again.

"I dare you to try," he says coolly. The visible side of her mouth lowers in a frown.

* * *

><p>When they reach the marketplace in the Upper Ring, the way the visible part of her face lights up is almost comical. She takes a few tentative steps ahead of him and then, after realizing that he's not going to restrain her, she nearly sprints toward a vendor selling odd hair trinkets.<p>

Zuko has no idea what she'd want with them, but no matter. She already seems cheered up, which is good. When they return to his office in about half an hour, she'll be in a much better mood.

He watches as she trails her dusky fingertips over the hair clips on display. Then, at the precise moment that the vendor isn't looking, she flicks a blue one up her sleeve. She crosses her arms over her chest and pretends to looks disinterested when the vendor glances back at her.

She has a small smile on her face as she walks back over to him.

"In the Fire Nation, thieves are punished by having their hands cut off."

She doesn't answer him, but her smile spreads into a full blown arrogant smirk.

"Don't get caught," he advises. "I won't help you if you do."

She shrugs indifferently and wanders over to a vendor selling crystals.

Keeping an eye on her, Zuko heads over to the only vendor he cares about.

"Good afternoon, Prince Zuko," a scruffy twelve year old boy greets.

"Noodles," Zuko nods his head in return.

"You're usual?" Noodles is already turning around.

"No. Give me the Southern stuff."

Noodles raises an eyebrow. "The Southern stuff? Has it been that kind of day?"

"I have to teach a volunteer how to read."

Noodles makes a face, then turns around and begins rummaging about. A couple of minutes later, he turns around holding Zuko's favorite pipe with the tobacco already prepared for him.

Zuko takes it and lights it with his finger without a word, bringing it to his lips.

Smoking to a firebender is sort of like bathing to a waterbender. Zuko is, quite literally, inhaling an essential part of his element.

He exhales slowly and contentedly. Noodles grins up at him. "Good?"

Zuko nods and turns around and faces the street. The waterbender has moved on to a jeweler.

Zuko thinks that maybe he should warn her, that the jeweler is notorious for catching and disposing of thieves.

But he doesn't. A part of him is curious to see if she can pull a fast one on the jeweler. The other part just doesn't care.

He focuses on enjoying his pipe, finally feeling relaxed. He closes his eyes, satisfied.

Then he hears a shout and, sighing out smoke, he opens his eyes again.

The jeweler has the waterbender by her hair.

"Thief! _Thief!_" he cries, and a moment later several other vendors quickly dart out from behind their booths and grab hold of the waterbender. This particular marketplace doesn't take thievery lightly.

Two burly men grab hold of Katara's hands. Punishment is dealt quickly for thieves.

But then, and Zuko isn't quite sure how she does it, Katara manages to slide from their hold and take off toward the palace gates.

Zuko wonders how she thinks she'd going to get past the gate guards without him accompanying her.

But the jeweler is fast, and when Katara gets trapped in a slow moving group of noblewomen heading to the bathhouse, he catches her and jerks her up into his arms. He drags her kicking and punching back to his booth.

Zuko and Noodles watch calmly where they're standing.

The men grab Katara and drag her into the ground, but not before she kicks the jeweler in the face. Blood spurts out of his now broken nose.

He retaliates by kicking her in the ribs. A couple of the other men follow his example.

Zuko has to hand it to her, not once does she cry out in pain. She just keeps struggling.

Two men grab hold of her right hand and hold it up while the jeweler pulls out a knife.

Katara shrieks in panic. Her legs thrash on the ground and her back arches as she tries to break out of their grip.

Zuko decides to finally call them off when the edge of the knife reaches her wrist. He hands the still burning pipe back to Noodles.

"_Stop_," he commands, voice ringing through the area. The men freeze and drop the waterbender. She's on her feet and behind the prince in a matter of seconds.

Zuko gives her a slight push in the direction of the palace gates and she stumbles forward.

"Prince Zuko, sir, that water tribe thing tried to steal from me!" the jeweler calls out, clearly outraged.

"I'm aware," Zuko says, starting to walk behind Katara.

"But sir! You're letting her—"

"Are you questioning my decisions?" Zuko snaps.

The jeweler immediately ducks his head, cheeks reddening.

"I didn't think so."

* * *

><p>Katara whirls on him when the palace gates come into view.<p>

"Why didn't you stop them?" she shouts, standing defiantly in front of him. Zuko notices a cut under her eye.

He sighs, growing annoyed. "I told you that if you got caught I wasn't going to help you."

"So you were just going to stand by and watch them cut off my hand?" Her visible blue eye fills with furious tears. For a moment Zuko pities her.

"Obviously I didn't, as both of your hands are still intact."

She shoves him. Hard. It's not powerful enough to make him fall, but it makes him take an involuntary step backward.

"You _barbarian_," she seethes. "No one in the water tribe _or _the earth kingdom would ever stand by and casually watch multiple men overtake a woman like you just did! I thought princes were supposed to be chivalrous! That they—"

"—walk about in a cloud of exceptional morality? That they save fair maidens who are in distress?" Zuko walks past the waterbender, his shoulder hitting hers with more force than necessary.

He turns back and gives Katara an unfazed look. "Perhaps that's true. But the thing is, you're neither a maiden nor are you fair."

The viewable half of her face falls, and as Zuko turns and walks through the palace gates and into the courtyard, he thinks that that might be one of the meanest things he's ever said.

* * *

><p>Instead of heading back to his office, Zuko sends Katara back to her room under guard and head towards his own room.<p>

Now in a piss poor mood, he closes his bedroom door shut behind him and sits down on the edge of his bed.

Azula chooses that exact moment to come sauntering in.

"Go away," he growls, glaring at the floor.

He'd bet that she'd started to smile. "What's got you in a foul mood?" she says, voice too sweet to be innocent. She's after something.

"Nothing in particular," he answers, straightening up and looking at her.

She's already dressed for dinner, with her armor on and her hair pulled back into a topknot. "I hear that you're teaching the waterbender how to read."

"It'll be difficult placing her with a suitable match if she's uneducated."

Azula quirks an eyebrow. "This stage of the Project is mostly about finding a match, Zuzu. She doesn't need to be literate."

He shrugs one shoulder and glowers. "I don't want any of the volunteers to not be able to do something as simple as reading. I'm head of the Project now."

His sister's lips curve down into a snarl, but just like that it's gone, replaced by a more neutral expression. "Out of curiosity, when are you starting the matchmaking process, Zuzu?"

Zuko falls back onto his bed and stares at the ceiling. He's silent.

"You're not going to answer me?" He can hear the irritation in her question. He smiles slightly.

"No."

There's a sharp intake of breath and then footsteps.

When Zuko hears her opening his door he says, "You don't need to worry about the Project anymore, Azula. You're no longer in control over it."

She slams the door so hard that the walls shudder.

* * *

><p>When he walks up to her room later that evening, scrolls and parchment in hand, the guards visibly straighten. They open the door for him and he walks in. "You can take a five minute break," he commands, and the guards quietly walk away.<p>

Katara sits on her bed, an assortment of items neatly arranged in front of her.

"Is that everything you managed to nick today?" he asks pointedly, eyes narrowing. Stealing is a bad habit. He'd have to break her of it.

She doesn't answer him, choosing instead to cross her arms over her chest and glare in another direction.

He puts the parchment and scrolls on top of a table by her door. "Here is some work for you to do over the next couple of days until I see you next. Keep writing down the alphabet until it's memorized—I'll test you to make sure you've done it. And here are a list of vocabulary words you'll need to be writing down as well—"

"I still don't see why you're bothering," she interrupts, head still turned away from him.

Zuko lets out a breath and rolls his eyes. "I don't want any of the volunteers to be unnecessarily stupid."

Four ice needles imbed themselves into the wall, right next to his head. Zuko isn't sure if she missed on purpose.

He puts a heated hand against the ice needles and watches them melt until all that's left are four little holes in the wall.

He sighs, turns back to her and opens his mouth to say something belligerent, but she's on him before he can make a sound.

Zuko has never been in a physical fight with a girl before; Azula doesn't count. All of his other fights have been with bending, or with other men.

Zuko learns very quickly that this annoying, scarred, and _female _waterbender can throw a punch like nobody's business.

She pummels into him, and he lets her because she'll be better off if she gets out all of this aggression.

But then she aims for below the belt. Zuko reaches his snapping point.

He shoves a hand into her shoulder, forcing her to stagger backward. She looks surprised, as if she had gotten used to him not fighting back. Then her face hardens in resolve. She darts forward, nearly a blur, and kicks him squarely in the stomach.

He gasps, the wind knocked out of him, but forces himself to recover quickly. He ducks a punch and barrels into her, knocking both of them onto the floor.

In the back of his mind he realizes that this is very un-princely behavior.

She catches him in the jaw, in the shoulder and the rib on his right side. Her fists are small, but her punches are forceful and Zuko knows he'll have bruises in the morning.

He knees her in the stomach. Her hair has fallen back from her face and both of her eyes fill with tears as she pants from the pain. He pulls his right fist back, prepared to give her one good punch in the head and knock her out. Then he'll put her on her bed and send for a physician to make sure he hasn't given her a concussion.

Her eyes widen in realization at what he's about to do and she blindly starts reaching for something on the floor. Zuko readies his fist, but then Katara swings her arm out and hits him on the head. Hard. With a blunt object.

His eyes roll into the back of his head and he's out.

* * *

><p>When he comes to, he's on a bed. Her bed.<p>

He stares blearily at the ceiling for a moment before he tilts his head up. Katara is sitting in a chair across the room, inspecting a dagger.

_His _dagger.

"Where'd you get that?" he rasps, sitting up on the bed despite his pounding headache.

She eyes him sharply. Her hair is neatly covering the scarred half of her face again. "Your boot."

He looks at his feet and, sure enough, his boots are gone. They're sitting by the bed.

Zuko sits silently for a long moment, slowly letting his mind recall the events that had happened up until he had blackened out.

"What did you hit me with?"

Katara motions to an ornate vase sitting on the floor by her window. It's not large, but it's bulky enough to do some damage.

Zuko lets out a breath. Now _he'll _have to be the one to go to the physician and have himself checked out for a concussion.

"The guards?"

Katara shrugs. "Outside the door. You were out by the time they got back, so they probably thought you'd left."

Zuko takes his time climbing out of the bed (he vaguely wonders how she was able to get him on it) and puts on his boots. Then he stands in front of the waterbender and leans back against the bedpost.

"What were you going to do with my dagger, put it through my heart?"

She surprises him by nodding.

He blinks, slightly uncomfortable. "And why didn't you?"

She lifts a shoulder nonchalantly and looks him in the eye. "Well, I realized that you don't have a heart, so stabbing you there would've been pointless, wouldn't it?"

Zuko almost smiles. "How thoughtful of you." He holds out a hand and gestures for the dagger. She hands it to him wordlessly.

He's almost at the door when she speaks again. "I won, by the way. The fight. I beat you."

Zuko doesn't answer her; instead he dumps all of the scrolls and parchment he had brought in onto her bed. "I wasn't kidding earlier. Have the alphabet memorized along with the words I gave you."

He places a hand on the doorknob. "Why should I?" she asks, voice quiet. She's not trying to be insolent, he can tell. She sounds unsure.

He turns back around. "You'll do it, because I know you can."

She bites her lip and then turns her head away, but he can tell that she was trying not to smile.

* * *

><p>As he walks from her room back to his he can't help but roll his eyes at himself.<p>

Zuko _hates _being sentimental in any way, shape, or form.

And yet he manages to fall asleep in peace.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

**Sometimes getting out one's aggression can make one more civil. *blink* I wouldn't know from experience or anything…**

**Just wanted to thank everyone once again for the reviews on the last chapter! You guys are super insightful and I really enjoy seeing what you guys have to say. :)**

**Hope everyone enjoyed this chapter! Review and let me know what your thoughts! **


	5. Depraved

_No there ain't no rest for the wicked_

_Until we close our eyes for good._

-"Ain't No Rest For The Wicked", Cage the Elephant

* * *

><p>It's deadly quiet.<p>

This isn't really a surprise, since Zuko is at a funeral.

The weather is nice; the sun beats down on his face relentlessly and he can feel sweat start to build underneath his white robes.

The pyre sits in the middle of the royal courtyard with all the funeral goers standing around it. High ranking soldiers form a tight ring around the pyre, all standing rigid as they await the body.

Usually the body would be sat atop the pyre wearing something ornate and white, or, if they're involved in the military, wearing their uniform.

They have to wrap Admiral Zhao's body up in red cloth, as it is unfit for public viewing. Whoever killed him ripped him up pretty badly. They have to carry his body up to the pyre in pieces.

As soon as Zhao's body is arranged neatly atop the pyre everyone looks at the Fire Lord expectantly.

Ozai, who is sitting on a high chair to Zuko's right, stands up with a grave expression on his face.

Zuko knows it's fake. His father couldn't be happier that the man who was a perpetual thorn in his side is finally dead.

Ozai raises his hand, makes a sweeping motion and yells, "Fire!"

The soldiers surrounding the pyre go into firebending forms in perfect unison. They punch out their fists and then the pyre goes up in flames. Zuko suppresses a yawn. They'll have to wait until the body is ash before they can leave.

The royal fire sages standing at the foot of the pyre begin a traditional funeral chant.

Zuko takes this moment to glance at his sister, who is on his left.

She's glaring at him with such hate that Zuko would shrink back if he actually feared her. But he doesn't. Not anymore.

Instead he presses his lips together in order to prevent himself from laughing at her.

It's probably inappropriate to laugh at a funeral.

* * *

><p>Zuko likes distractions.<p>

Distractions can come in quite a few different forms. There's smoking, drinking, eating, sleeping, and training.

The distraction that Zuko is using tonight is skinny with black hair and brown eyes.

He knows her fairly well; she's been a seamstress at the palace for a couple of years now. He's not really sure what her name is, but this has never seemed to bother her.

His lips are at her throat. Her fingers are digging into his shoulder and one hand is tangled in his hair. His crown is askew. She lets out low moans and rolls and grinds her hips into his. It feels good. Actually, it feels better than good. It feels great. He pushes the opening of her servant's uniform off to the side, revealing creamy white skin. As he starts to place kisses on her now bare shoulder, his mind starts to focus on a single thing: pleasure.

And not just his pleasure either. _Their _pleasure. Zuko is good at this, this whole "lover" thing. His bedroom reputation is flawless.

There's a knock at the door.

Zuko doesn't stop touching the seamstress; they're only a couple of feet away from his bed. Whoever is at the door will eventually get the message that he's not coming out any time soon.

Except after a moment of silence whoever is at the door starts knocking again, except this time with more urgency.

Zuko rips his mouth away from the seamstress, his right hand fisting into the fabric around her hip. "_What?_" he barks.

"Prince Zuko." The man on the other side of his bedroom door sounds horrified. "I am terribly sorry to…disturb you at this time, but there has been an incident in the training area."

Zuko pulls away from the seamstress and she whimpers in protest. "What kind of incident?"

"Two of the volunteers got into a fight, sir. One of them isn't in the best of shape."

Zuko lets out an explosive sigh. He glances between the seamstress and the door. The temptation to stay in his bedroom with this girl is great. But on the other hand, the Project is his responsibility now and it would be negligent for him to not attend to the volunteers.

"I'll be right out," he says to the door gruffly.

The seamstress frowns at him in clear disappointment.

Zuko doesn't apologize to her. He just puts his discarded shirt back on and leaves his room.

* * *

><p>The setting sun is casting a dark orange glow of the training area set up specifically for the volunteers.<p>

The man who knocked on his door leads him into the area with sure steps. Zuko recognized him as soon as he opened up his bedroom door. He's one of the waterbender's guards.

This doesn't bode well.

Zuko pauses at the edge of the area. At first glance the scene in front of him doesn't come across as all that serious. The blind earthbender is yelling at the waterbender, who sits on the ground a dozen or so feet away from her.

At second glance Zuko sees that Katara is covered in bruises and contusions and is cradling her right wrist. And she's sitting because she cannot stand up.

"The blind girl challenged the waterbender to a fight, bending only," the guard informs Zuko in a low voice. Zuko slowly nods in comprehension.

The blind earthbender is still yelling.

"—absolutely _pathetic. _Are you sure you're even a waterbender? I'm not even _wet_—"

When Zuko makes a step in her direction she swivels around and stares towards him warily, but she hushes up. The welt on her neck from their last encounter is still healing.

Satisfied, Zuko turns away and walks right up to Katara. She looks even worse up close. Her one visible eye, the one not normally covered by her hair, is nearly swollen shut. There are quite a few rips and tears throughout the fabric of her clothes, and a deep cut on her knee bleeds profusely. She looks like she's just been continuously pummeled by a bunch of rocks, which of course she has.

The blind girl starts to talk again. "How are you still sitting there?" she accuses Katara. "This spar isn't even over. Get off your lazy ass and let's finish this."

"I don't think she can," Zuko says sharply.

Katara's head snaps up when she hears him and she begins to shake her head quickly. _Please don't_, she mouths.

"Looks like you've broken her wrist," Zuko informs the blind girl. Katara's shoulders slump in defeat. "One of her eyes is swollen shut, she's covered in bruises, her knee is bleeding pretty badly, and since she's refusing to stand up I think you've hurt her ankle somehow."

He turns his head and stares back at the earthbender. She's gone pale, very pale. Her milky green eyes widen in horror and then she turns her head away, obviously guilty.

Being blind would mean she cannot see the damage she's managing to inflict upon the people she's fighting.

"You should be grateful that this was a bending fight and not just a purely physical one. Otherwise you wouldn't have known where to swing your fists."

The blind girl goes from pale to bright red.

Zuko shifts his attention back to Katara.

He moves down to help her up off the ground, but she scoots away from him as if she doesn't want him to touch her. Seconds later a couple of her assigned guards appear, and one scoops her up quickly. She winces a bit as he jostles her injured wrist.

Zuko frowns. This bothers him.

"Take her back to her room," he instructs. "I'll go get the physician."

He's almost tempted to tell the blind girl that she can sleep outside tonight.

* * *

><p>He brings her grapes.<p>

It's not like it was hard, he just went into the kitchens and took them from a bowl, but the way Katara's face lights up (impressive, considering how beat up it is) when she sees them gives Zuko a slight feeling of accomplishment.

The physician is on his way, and after handing the waterbender the fruit Zuko leans against a wall and crosses his arms over his chest.

The waterbender, propped up on her bed by a bunch of pillows, pops a purple grape into her mouth and sighs happily.

"It's just fruit," Zuko mentions after a beat.

Katara stiffens on the bed. "I don't get to eat it much."

"Fruit is pretty common in the Earth Kingdom and the Fire Nation."

She shrugs one shoulder. "It's also pretty expensive."

"But don't you have sticky fingers?"

She scowls at him and opens her mouth to comment, but the door swings open and the physician and his new assistant walk in.

Zuko has never seen the assistant before in his life, but when the young woman sees him she turns pink.

The physician lets out a pitying noise when he sees Katara. "Someone did a number on you."

The waterbender turns her head away, clearly shutting down the conversation before it can begin.

The physician moves to the bed and sets down his bag on the bedside table. He pulls out salves, ointments, towels, bandages, and liquid filled bottles. "I'm going to need you to take off your shirt," he asks Katara.

She turns bright red and looks pointedly at her lap, but she complies. It takes her awhile to pull her top off, and she winces and whimpers multiple times as she does so. When it's off the physician lets out a slow sigh. Katara's torso looks bad.

"Does it hurt for you to breathe?" the physician asks, bending over to examine her side. Katara shakes her head.

After a couple of minutes the physician declares that none of her ribs are broken. He gestures for his assistant. "Bring me the bowl of water."

The girl moves forward quickly, too quickly. She glances up at Zuko right as she reaches Katara, jumps, and then spills water all over the patient.

Zuko rolls his eyes.

"I'm so sorry!" the assistant cries, grabbing a towel and trying desperately to dab up the water.

Katara waves her away. She moves her uninjured hand in a sweeping motion and the water lifts itself into the air and neatly returns to the bowl.

"No harm no foul," she says with a shrug.

The assistant nods, looks back at the prince and then quickly mumbles another apology.

Katara shots Zuko a look and he's somewhat surprised to see that she's amused.

Some time passes as the physician cleans and bandages Katara's wounds, then he puts her broken wrist in a sling and wraps her ankle. Katara pouts.

"You know," the physician says as he starts to gather his things. "I'm surprised you needed me. Most waterbenders have the ability to heal small injuries. Some of the more talented ones can actually heal life threatening ones."

Katara's face flushes and she shrugs one shoulder. "I can't," she says sharply, dismissing the subject and glaring at the foot of the bed.

The physician eyes her briefly before picking his bag off the bedside table. "It would be a useful skill. Sometimes I wish I could do something like that. It would certainly make my job easier."

Zuko clears his throat, calmly reminding the physician that he's still in the room.

"I will check up on you tomorrow," the physician states quickly before exiting. The assistant quickly follows him, blushing and stumbling as she passes Zuko.

There's silence for a long time after they close the door behind them.

Finally Katara breaks it. "Do most girls trip over themselves when you're around?"

"Yes," he answers smoothly.

Her head turns and she gives him a disgusted look. "I bet you _love_ that."

He catches her sarcasm and chooses not to indulge her with an answer.

"You're not very good at waterbending," he says instead. It's not an assumption, it's a fact.

"I threw ice needles at you the other day," she reminds him. She looks upset.

"Yes, and you missed. Not that they were all that impressive."

"_SHUT UP!_" she screams from her bed.

Zuko jumps, startled by her overreaction.

Before he can say anything the waterbender rolls away from him and presents him with her back. Her shoulders are trembling.

"It's not like the Project is too concerned about your skills," Zuko says, confused by how she's acting. "We just need you for your genes."

This seems to make things worse. Katara stills completely before slowly grabbing a blanket and pulling it up over her body like a shield.

"Go away." Her soft voice is muffled.

Now he just feels completely confused. A lot of benders aren't actually good at bending. Why is she taking her lack of talent so personally? "Look—"

"Please. Just go."

He frowns and then sees the scrolls and parchment he'd brought in the other say sitting untouched on her desk.

"I'll check up on you tomorrow, and I expect you to have the things I asked you to memorize memorized. No exceptions."

Then he leaves. He might have slammed the door behind him.

* * *

><p>The next morning Zuko joins his father and sister for breakfast, as per usual.<p>

The meal is quiet, as it normally is, until Fire Lord Ozai addresses his son. "Zuko, I heard that two of the volunteers got into a fight yesterday."

Zuko freezes. Across from him Azula places her chopsticks down onto her plate and folds her hands against the table. Her golden eyes gleam.

"That's correct," Zuko answers, voice steady.

"The waterbender was injured," Ozai says.

Zuko slowly nods. His gut twists in apprehension.

"Has the earthbender who injured her been punished yet?"

Zuko clears his throat. "No."

Ozai frowns in disappointment and Azula gives Zuko a small smile.

"You must punish her. The waterbender is invaluable. Drill it into the other volunteer's heads that they cannot touch her."

"Of course," Zuko answers evenly. "It will be done."

Ozai looks him in the eye for a long moment. Then he nods once in satisfaction and continues with his meal.

Zuko represses a sigh of relief.

Azula's upper lip curls in a snarl.

* * *

><p>Zuko finds them in a dusty section of the library.<p>

He's already sent out the order for the blind earthbender's punishment and has decided to distract himself by spending the rest of his afternoon looking up training techniques.

Not that he's planning to train anyone, of course.

They're old. When he unravels them a dusky smell hits him, and the edges are frayed, but they're definitely still useable.

The pictures in them are graphic. One wouldn't need to read the descriptions to understand the point of these particular scrolls.

* * *

><p>When he opens up the door to the waterbender's room he finds her in the corner chair, hunched over her desk. She's writing out the alphabet, but looks up at him as he enters.<p>

The visible half of her face is more difficult to read than normal since her eye is swollen shut. Zuko supposes she can see just fine out of the other one, although he doesn't understand how with all of that hair in the way.

She looks terrified.

"I'm not done!" she says, clearly panic. "I'm got um, maybe half memorized? If you could just give me—"

"Tomorrow then," Zuko cuts her off. Her shoulders sag in relief.

"I thought you would like to know that the blind earthbender has been dealt with."

Katara goes pale. "What?"

"I've sent someone to inflict all of you injuries onto her. An eye for an eye. Seemed just."

Katara's face drains of color."No."

Zuko frowns.

"But she's just a kid!" Katara exclaims. She starts to stand up, but wobbles on her injured ankle. Finally she slumps back down into her seat. She sighs. "I was the one who challenged her in the first place, I was—"

"An honorable fighter doesn't let his enemy suffer just to make him suffer," Zuko interrupts. Doesn't this girl know anything about a fighting code of conduct? "Your waterbending was so pitiful that you didn't even get her wet, yet she obviously continued to attack you despite the fact that the two of you weren't evenly matched. That's unacceptable."

The waterbender looks sad. "But she's blind." As she trails off she turns her head away from Zuko, unable to look at him. "You shouldn't have punished her like that. Being temporarily confined to her room would've sufficed."

For a second Zuko considers telling her that his father told him to do it, that he hadn't been planning to punish the blind earthbender in the first place. But he doesn't.

He dumps what's in his arms on top of her bed instead.

"What are those?" Katara asks, taken aback.

"Waterbending scrolls." Zuko is already heading towards the door.

"She's called Toph, by the way." The waterbender's voice is soft and clear.

"I don't care." Zuko is out of her bedroom and down the hallway quickly, but it's no use.

The name is already seared into his head.

* * *

><p>That night he has to be sick again. He had hoped that he'd be able to fall asleep, and that sleeping would be his distraction.<p>

But he can't.

He frowns at his reflection in the mirror and thinks about what he's done, what he's responsible for. He'll need to write uncle soon. In his letters he tells Uncle everything, although in reality Uncle doesn't know anything.

Zuko _never _sends the letters.

Eventually he manages to fall asleep. He dreams about ripping, and there's screaming and blood. Sometimes the blood is his sister's, sometimes it's the waterbender's or a servant's.

Most of the time it's his.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

**First off, I want to apologize for the lateness of this chapter. I caught the flu, which had me out of commission for a solid week. Then I nearly lost one of the two jobs I have and I also have family in town.**

**Combine all that with feeling stuck with this chapter and we've got ourselves a late update.**

**Second off, sorry that this chapter isn't all that long. This chapter kept giving me trouble for some reason, so to be honest I'm just happy that it's finished and out there for you guys to read.**

**I do hope everyone liked this despite the lateness and the shortness! Please review and let me know your thoughts!**

**Also, Happy Valentine's Day! It's a pointless and ludicrous holiday, but I'm so excited for the candy. ;)**


	6. Spinelessness

_They make me, make me dream your dreams_

_They make me, make me scream your screams._

"Showbiz", Muse

* * *

><p>Zuko does not particularly want to do this.<p>

But he has to.

He walks purposefully down the hallway, towards the volunteers' dining room. After the new volunteers spend a couple of meals with him, getting used to their new home, they start eating with the rest of the volunteers.

It's got something to do with "camaraderie". Zuko doesn't really care.

A couple of guards stationed at the entrance quickly open the doors for him, and he strides in with his head held high.

There's a moment of silence as the volunteers (all thirty-two of them) turn and glance at him. Then they go back to eating.

Zuko rakes his eyes over them until he spots the three earthbenders that he needs. Then he swiftly informs them that after they finish their breakfast they're to accompany him to their first Interviews.

All of them obediently nod their heads, but they look nervous.

Zuko would suspect that Interviewing for your potential spouse would be nerve wracking for anyone.

He's about to leave in order to wait outside when he spots them.

They're at the far end of the table, laughing over something.

His feet start moving forward before his mind can give them the order.

The waterbender glares at him with irritation as he approaches, but otherwise she doesn't say anything. The earthbender, however, breaks out in a sadistic smile as he nears.

Her left wrist is wrapped up in a bandage, and there're some minor cuts and bruises on her face and arms, but otherwise she looks all right.

Katara huffs. "Yes?"

Zuko swallows, quickly trying to come up with an excuse as to why he's in front of them.

"He's just wondering how I'm doing," the earthbender, Toph, answers. "I appreciate your concern. Except not really." Then she shovels fruit into her mouth.

"Since when were you two friends?" Zuko blurts out. A couple of the volunteers sitting nearby are casting him funny looks.

The waterbender opens her mouth to answer, but Toph beats her to it. "We're not. We're just suffering in the same way. You'd know all about that."

Katara's mouth snaps shut and she smacks the earthbender on the shoulder with her good hand, looking confused and annoyed. "But I thought—"

Toph rolls her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, Sweetness. I know that you secretly want to be friends with everyone."

Katara's head turns in Zuko's direction. She looks him right in the eye. Then she laughs. "That's not true."

* * *

><p>Zuko almost forgets that he's supposed to go over Katara's alphabet memorization with her.<p>

Almost.

It's dark outside, past dinner, and Zuko hopes that Katara isn't the type of person to go to bed early.

Her guards part for him wordlessly when he reaches her door.

She's sitting on the edge of her bed pouring over the waterbending scrolls he'd given her. And, to Zuko's complete annoyance, Toph is sitting on the chair beside the bed.

"Not you," he groans, half tempted to turn around and leave.

"Surprise," the blind girl says before grinning at him. "You'll never get rid of me."

Zuko hopes that that eventually proves to be untrue.

He decides that it's in his best interest to just ignore her. "Waterbender," he says, turning his whole body and facing her, "we need to go over your writing."

Katara squirms a bit, clearly uncomfortable. "Okay, well, I have _most _of it done, and I've been working on a few extra things but—"

"She still can't get it right," Toph concludes for her. "Being literate isn't in the cards for her."

"Okay," Zuko snaps, frowning. "You. Out." He calls for the guards and moments later they're inside the room, carefully pulling the earthbender to her feet.

"But we were just starting to have fun!" the blind girl calls out sarcastically. But when she reaches the door she says goodbye to Katara and even closes the door behind her.

"You two have bonded," Zuko observes, walking over to the now vacated chair. Katara has moved across her bed to her bedside table, where she's now going through multiple pieces of parchment.

"Let's see…er—" she catches a few before they can fall to the floor, then quickly straightens them out in her hand.

She scoots back to the edge of the bed. "Here," she says, handing him one piece of parchment. Then she pushes the rest behind her back.

Zuko glances down at her written alphabet. It's sloppy, the ink is smudged in multiple places, and some of the characters look a bit off, but otherwise it's not too bad.

"What've you written on those?" he asks, gesturing to the papers she's trying to hide.

Her one visible cheek turns scarlet. "N-Nothing."

Zuko is quick. He darts out of the chair, towards the bed, and snatches up the extra parchments before she can even blink.

They're covered in words, words Katara has clearly tried to write out for herself. It's actually quite impressive.

And then he spots something scribbled in the corner.

"You wrote my name," he says quietly.

She ducks her head, clearly embarrassed.

"Well, sort of."

Her head pops back up. "Huh? How—"

"Well," he holds the parchment up in front of her face and points her mistake out with his finger, "I'm a _prince _not a prin_cess_."

The waterbender turns redder, which Zuko didn't realize was even possible. "It looked right to me," she grumbles.

Zuko isn't sure if she's trying to insult him.

"Where's your ink and brush?"

She gestures to the bedside table.

When he comes back she narrows her eye at him. "Don't spill ink onto my bed," she instructs.

He nods. "Here's where you went wrong…"

He references the alphabet, circles her mistake, then writes out the correct form of the word (of his _name_) and then hands her the ink brush. She traces out the word with ease, and then looks up at him for reassurance. He nods, and tilts the edge of his mouth up in an almost-smile.

She looks relieved.

* * *

><p>"Prince Zuko."<p>

Ozai's voice jars him out of his stupor. Zuko is at breakfast and he couldn't feel more exhausted if he tried. He can barely remember the last time he had a good night's sleep.

"Yes, father?"

"You are prepared for the banquet this evening, are you not?"

Zuko nearly groans. "Yes, father."

He has no idea why his father is asking him this. Or why his father seems remotely interested in tonight's banquet. Ozai is about as big of a fan of banquets as Zuko is. Which is to say, they both despise them.

Zuko uses them as an excuse to get drunk or laid. Or both.

Ozai just uses them to further show off his crown.

For some reason this thought makes Zuko miss Uncle Iroh. He used to always make banquets bearable by singing the dumbest songs.

Zuko sighs.

"I want you to bring the volunteers tonight. The ones who are of age, of course."

Zuko nearly chokes on a dumpling, causing Azula to snicker. "Sir?"

"Perhaps we can gain interest for the ones about to start Interviews by introducing them around in a social setting."

Zuko manages not to roll his eyes. Ozai just wants to show off the waterbender. She's a big deal, and whoever she ends up marrying will also turn into a big deal.

"Of course, father."

"And Zuko?"

Zuko looks Ozai in the eye. "Yes, father?"

"Use tonight as an excuse to get to know some of the nobleman's daughters. It's about time you got married and produced an heir."

* * *

><p>It takes Zuko about five minutes to get ready for this banquet. He puts on his fancy robes and then he pulls his hair into a partial topknot, so that most of it is down past his shoulders.<p>

He glances briefly into his mirror. Good enough.

There's a sharp knock on his door, and Zuko nearly throws something at it because _when will he ever get a moment of peace around here?_

He opens it up, sees who it is and rolls his eyes. "What has she done now?"

The guard looks sheepish. "She's giving a couple of the servant girls some…trouble, sir."

"Oh for the love of Agni, _move_." Then he's shoving the guard out of his way and making the long trek towards the servant's quarters.

He slams open her door and glowers at everyone in the room. In takes him seconds to assess the situation. There are two servant girls in the room, one responsible for Katara's dress and the other for her hair and makeup, Zuko would guess.

One of the girls looks flustered, and the other has an entire arm caked in ice. The second one looks pissed.

"What's the problem?" Zuko asks, reaching up to rub his temples.

The servant with the ice-arm waves her gestures in Katara's direction. Said waterbender is in the corner of her room, an orb of water swirling in front of her. "She won't cooperate, Prince Zuko!"

"How so?"

The ice-arm servant girl takes a big breath. "She won't allow us to touch her face!"

Everything clicks into place.

"We were attempting to pull her hair into a traditional topknot, but she pulled out her water and started to _bend_, sir! We cannot prepare her for tonight if she won't let—"

Zuko raises a hand and the girl hushes up. Two guards walk into the room on his command. "Hold her down," he instructs. They move toward the waterbender.

She shoots him a look of betrayal and he narrows his eyes. "It's just a face."

* * *

><p>Technically speaking, Zuko has one friend.<p>

Sort of.

His name is Chang, a high ranking nobleman's son. He's kind of a tool, but Zuko finds him entertaining on nights like tonight.

They're both standing off to the side of the banquet hall in the palace, watching everyone else mingle. They're also waiting for the rice wine to be served.

The volunteers that are of age stand off in their own circle. Banquet goers occasionally stop what they're doing in order to talk to them, faun over them, or survey them.

Zuko doesn't care.

Zuko _hates _banquets.

"So, the waterbender is hot," Chang states, nudging Zuko with his elbow.

Chang is functioning under the misconception that Zuko fools around with the attractive volunteers. Zuko does not.

Zuko's head jerks up and he spots Katara. She's leaning against the wall, a ways off from the rest of the volunteers, her right profile facing toward them. She looks out of sorts. Zuko wonders if that's because Toph isn't here, since the blind earthbender is under seventeen and therefore not of age.

Then Katara turns her head, looking over the banquet hall. Her scars look out of place with the rest of her.

"Oh. Just kidding, then," Change says, his upper lip pulling back in disgust. "What a shame; she's got a nice figure."

Zuko shrugs. Her body is fine by anyone's standards, he supposes. He looks away from her.

That's when he notices all the staring.

People all around the room are eyeing Katara with raises eyebrows. Their hands rise to their mouths so that they can whisper to each other behind them, as if it isn't completely obvious who they're talking about.

Zuko supposes that these types of people aren't used to seeing someone who is less than perfection.

He turns around and makes his way into the kitchens.

* * *

><p>Zuko returns to the banquet hall from the kitchens right as Ozai is making his speech.<p>

"—my son, the new head of Project Kongzhi." Ozai gestures towards him, his gaze calculating.

Everyone in the room turns in Zuko's direction. "Congratulations, Prince Zuko." There's a polite scattering of clapping and people raise their drinks towards him.

Zuko, who has two small glasses of rice wine in his hands, nods back, feeling horrendously awkward as everyone stares at him. A moment later, when everyone goes back to their socializing, he quickly darts to the side of the room.

Then he makes his way to the waterbender.

She spares him a glance as he comes to stand in front of her. Then she crosses her arms over her chest and pointedly looks away.

She looks miserable. She's standing with her scars facing the wall, in the hopes that people won't be able to notice them all that well.

Zuko holds out one of the glasses of ice wine. "It's just a face." He repeats what he had said from before, but the meaning this time feels different.

_Is _different.

She frowns at him, and then takes the glass. She doesn't take a sip.

They stand next to each other for the rest of the evening.

* * *

><p>When the banquet is finally over, he goes back to her room. He plans to give her a scroll about The Blue Spirit, for educational purposes, of course.<p>

She stares at him from her chair.

"Why are you always coming in here?" she accuses, frowning. "You don't visit the other volunteers nearly as much. Toph says so." She's pulled her hair out of its topknot so that her it shields the left side of her face again.

He shrugs one shoulder. "It's because you cause the most trouble."

Her visible eye narrows.

"You really do," Zuko says honestly.

"Is it because I'm the only waterbender?"

Zuko stills.

"I know I am," she continues. "I'm the first and only one, so that makes me _special_, doesn't it?"

Zuko remains quiet.

The waterbender stands up and makes her way over to him. Her limp is only slight. The look in her one blue eye is fierce.

"I was mocked tonight, Prince Zuko, for the sake of _fashion_," she snarls. "And the reason why you stood next to me tonight was because you felt _guilty_. But not guilty enough to actually do anything about it." She shoves a hand against his shoulder. His heart is thundering in his chest. He's not sure why.

"You're a coward," she says. "Me, all of the volunteers…we're just some _joke _to you. Just some means to an end so that the Fire Nation can get its way. But just so you know, _Prince_, I will fight for myself and all the other volunteers," she growls. "You can count on it."

"I am not a coward," Zuko finally says, voice low. For a moment he thinks that maybe Katara didn't hear him.

The visible half of her face is blank, devoid of all emotion. "Yes, you are."

Something snaps. He bolts out of her room before he can do something that he'll regret. He's shaking and he swears that his vision is tented with red.

Zuko is not a coward.

Zuko is _not _a coward.

* * *

><p>He's in his bed. He has no recollection of how he even got back to his room, much less his bed. The sun hasn't risen yet.<p>

Someone is standing over him; a guard. Zuko jerks upwards into a sitting position. He's fully awake now.

Before he can snarl at the man, the guard says, "Prince Zuko, your sister has gone missing."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

**Okay, so yeah. I realize that this chapter is short. Forgive me, guys, but I'm sort of stuck on this story. I know exactly what happens in the latter half. I've had all of that planned out for awhile and I'm pumped to write it, but at this point in the story I'm sort of left scratching my head. I'll eventually figure it all out, I always do, but it might take a little extra time for me to get over this hurdle.**

**I do hope everyone liked this chapter, though. Next chapter Zuko gets to play a game of Where's Azula? Unfortunately for him, I don't think Azula is prone to wearing red and white stripes, so she might be more difficult to spot in a crowd.**

**Anywho, please review and let me know what you thought! And thanks for your patience! You guys are awesome! :D**


	7. Revolted

There's nothing worse in the this world  
>Than pay-back from a jealous girl<br>The laws of man, they don't apply  
>When blood gets in a woman's eye.<p>

—"Ten Cent Pistol", The Black Keys

* * *

><p>Zuko and his father make a minimal effort to find Azula.<p>

Ozai orders three of the best trackers in the Capitol to find the missing princess and bring her back to the palace, but the men show back up two weeks later with nothing. No leads, no clues, no spottings.

Zuko scratches the back of his head in boredom as the men report back to his father in the throne room.

"There have been no signs of Princess Azula, Fire Lord. It's like she vanished." All three men fidget from where they're crouched in front of the throne. Zuko suspects that they'll probably be beheaded for their failure.

Ozai is silent for a long time. Finally he waves his hand from behind his veil of flames and the three men stand up, awaiting their fate.

"Your services are appreciated. You're dismissed."

The trackers pauses, all of them clearly shocked, before they turn around and quickly file out of the room. The door bangs shut behind them.

"Will you send out more trackers, father?" Zuko asks. He's not allowed to sit behind the flames as of yet, but he's still off to his father's right hand side on an elevated platform.

Ozai is quiet and for a moment Zuko thinks that he's not going to answer him. "It's such a shame, Prince Zuko, about your sister." Then he stands and makes his way off the throne and out of the throne.

"Such a shame," Zuko repeats to his father's back. He grins to himself.

It's perfect for another week. That's when the first body shows up.

* * *

><p>"It—excuse me, <em>he<em>—showed up this morning, Prince Zuko."

There are flies buzzing around everywhere. Zuko and the three guards examining the body have strips of fabric covering their mouths and noses.

"No one saw him being _dragged through the gates?_" Zuko snarls, glaring at the head guard in charge over the palace gates and subsequent courtyard.

The man rapidly shakes his head. "No, sir. We were in the middle of switching from the night shift to the day shift when it, er, _he _just sort of…appeared."

"This is unacceptable." Zuko swears under his breath and stands up from his crouch. "Bodies don't just pop up out of nowhere, and they _especially _don't pop up in the _royal palace._"

Especially not bodies like _this_.

They're only able to tell that it's a man because of his beard. His face is swollen and covered with blood and contusions, making him unrecognizable. There are cuts covering his arms, legs, and torso and there is a deep gash across his neck, like someone slit his throat.

Someone wanted this man to die painfully.

"Our most sincerest of apologies, Prince Zuko," the head guard says, face pale and eyes wide. "We alerted you as soon as it—_he _was discovered."

Zuko heaves a sigh. He'll have to let Ozai know immediately. That was not going to be a pleasant conversation.

One of the other two guards steps around the body and up to Zuko's side. "Sir, we think the cause of death is his throat. Looks like someone slit it, sir."

There's suddenly a muttering of multiple voice, and Zuko turns in dismay to see volunteers and nobles crossing the courtyard not too far from where he and the guards are standing. They're probably here to "tour the gardens", he expects.

"Quick!" he snaps, moving to block the body from the crowd's view. "Take the body to the physician so that he can examine it."

The head guard turns a faint shade of green. He and the other two guards move together and pick up the body, but one of them loses his grip and the dead man falls to the ground. The wound on his neck pulls apart and the dead man's head falls back unnaturally.

The head guard turns around and retches.

"What's going on?"

Zuko freezes, horror and irritation creeping up his spine. The waterbender and the blind earthbender are behind them, each flanked with a personal guard.

He hasn't spoken to the waterbender in weeks, nor has he made another attempt at teaching her how to read and write. She pissed him off so he decided to completely ignore her existence. Admittedly, it was the petty way out. Zuko doesn't care.

"This doesn't concern you, waterbender," he says, voice muffled by the fabric that's still covering his mouth and nose.

Her one visible blue eye narrows, but before she can snap back at him the blind girl smacks her in the arm. "What's that smell, Katara?" She sounds alarmed.

Zuko turns to the head guard, who now looks like he's going to pass out. "Round up the other volunteers and those stupid nobles and escort them to the gardens. That's what they came to see anyway. Hurry." The guard doesn't have to be told twice. He takes off.

"What's that _smell?_" Toph repeats, milky green eyes tilted toward the ground.

Zuko is in a particularly bad mood this morning. "What, earthbender, haven't you ever seen a dead body before? Oh, wait…"

He's answered with silence. The blind girl has gone as pale as a ghost and she gives him no witty comeback.

The waterbender pats her shoulder reassuringly. "Go back to the others. I'll deal with this."

Toph nods and then quickly takes a few steps back before turning around and bolting away, her personal guard right behind her.

Katara struts up, perfectly at ease.

"When was he discovered?" she asks, crouching down to inspect the body.

"This…this morning?" One of the two guards looks at Zuko with confusion. The prince simply rolls his eyes and shrugs his shoulders. He's slowly getting used to this girl and her unpredictability.

The waterbender stands up and taps her chin in thought. "Clearly his throat has been slit but…" She isn't covering her nose but she still inhales deeply. Zuko and the remaining guards openly stare at her.

This girl is insane.

She toes at the side of the body before rolling him over with her foot. "_That _is the cause of death."

The parts of his clothes that were covering his back have been burned away, and scorch marks cover his bare, blackened skin.

"Someone fried him," Katara says. It's then that she notices the men's shocked expressions. "What?"

"I thought you worked with a bounty hunter," Zuko says. He could kick himself for sounding woozy. The smell of burned flesh coming from the body's exposed back is starting to seep through the fabric over his nose. It's nauseating.

Katara frowns. "Not everyone that we were paid to find were alive, Prince Zuko."

This particular tid-bit of information makes him sick, but Zuko straightens up and manages to keep his cool.

Katara's upper lip curls in disgust and she squats down again. "There's a _pin_ sticking out of his neck."

Zuko hunkers down so that he can see what she's pointing at. That's when he sees it; a pin shaped like a tea cup has been shoved into the back of this man's neck.

That's when it clicks.

"That's the emblem for the Dragonheart Teashop in the upper ring." Zuko remembers the man's beard and finally takes notice that his clothes were expensive silks at one point in time. "This man is Shang Len." He promptly spits on the body. "Wrap this man up in a sheet," he commands. "Take him and throw him into the sea. The fishes can have him."

The waterbender quickly stands up and steps in front of him. "Don't you think you should be more respectful of the dead?" she says, voice snippy. Now _this _is the version of Katara that he knows well. The annoying one.

"No," Zuko answers, shouldering past her. "That teashop owner openly opposed the Fire Lord's reign and the war. Three years ago he tried to put a hit out on my father." He's walking back through the courtyard but the waterbender is keeping up with him stride for stride.

The long brown hair that she has covering her scars swings a bit with each of her steps. "Then why didn't you just take care of him then, if he was such an enemy?"

"Couldn't prove it. Fire Lord's can't really go around handing out execution orders for no reason. It doesn't look good." He stops suddenly and she rams into his back. "Why do you care?" he demands.

"I—" She ducks her head and Zuko is surprised to see that she looks a little embarrassed. "It feels familiar," she murmurs quietly.

"Go catch up with the rest of the volunteers," he grunts and Katara frowns at him before walking away, her personal guard following her.

At least the conversation with Ozai is going to go much smoother. Ozai has always despised Shang Len.

As he walks into the palace and towards his father's office, Zuko thinks he might have finally found something productive for the waterbender to do.

* * *

><p>Ozai's office is stately and free of any and all debris. Ozai sits in his office chair like it is another throne. It doesn't look like a room where the Fire Lord spends most of his time running the country.<p>

The guards close the door behind Zuko.

"What is it?" Ozai doesn't look up from where he is going over paperwork.

"Father, I just wanted to inform you that a body was found at the palace gates this morning. On the inside of the gates, I should say."

The Fire Lord looks up at that. He frowns and stares at his son. He and Zuko mirror each other in practically every physical way. They have the same eyes, the same high cheekbones, the same straight nose and the same glossy, raven colored hair. There is no mistaking their relation.

Sometimes Zuko wishes he looked more like his long gone mother.

"Were you able to identify it?" Ozai sets down his ink brush and leans back, lacing his fingers.

"Yes, father. It was Shang Len."

Ozai's golden eyes gleam. "Was it now?"

Zuko nods.

"What did you do with him?"

"I sent him for a swim."

Ozai doesn't say anything, but by the tilt of his mouth Zuko can tell that he is extremely pleased. His father rolls up the scroll that he was writing on and pushes it to the side. "Very well. You can take your leave now, my son."

Zuko about faints, but manages to walk out of the office with assurance.

His father hasn't referred to him as "my son" since he was eight.

* * *

><p>This time he decides to be polite and knock on the waterbender's door before he waltzes in. Compared to his sour mood from earlier this morning he's currently feeling absolutely <em>joyous.<em>

He still doesn't bother to wait for her to give the okay to enter, though.

He's somewhat surprised (but at the same time not so surprised) to find her hovering over her desk and looking over the alphabet and the list of words he'd given her weeks ago.

Her hair is blocking her profile so he can't gage her reaction based on her expression.

"Yes?" she says, voice dry.

Zuko closes the door and leans against before casually examining his fingernails. "I've got a proposition for you," he says in a laid-back manner, not looking up.

She's quiet for some time until he hears a chair scraping against the floor. She's turned to face him. "Does this have something to do with the body that was found this morning?" She cuts straight to the point.

Zuko decides not to play games with her. "Yes."

Her right eye lights up with excitement. She leans forward in her chair and places her hand on her knees. "I knew it." She smirks.

"You seemed…composed this morning. Around the body, I mean. That's a useful quality. You've mentioned multiple times that you've worked for a bounty hunter, and for your sake I hope you weren't making that up—"

"I wasn't!"

"—because it's your head on the line if you are. Anyway, Fire Lord Ozai has sent out the best trackers in the Capitol to find my sister, but she managed to elude them quite well. I need you to find her."

The waterbender's visible eye narrows. "How does finding your kidnapped sister have to do with the body from this morning?"

Zuko outright laughs. He can't help it. "You're a fool if you think Azula let herself be kidnapped. And the two are connected. Trust me."

She crosses her arms across her chest. "I don't."

"So it's settled then?" Zuko reaches for the doorknob. "I figure the Dragonheart Teashop will be a good place to start—"

"What's in it for me?" Katara interrupts, standing up. Her expression has darkened. She places one hand on her popped hip. "You don't get something for nothing, you know."

Zuko knows this all too well. He lets go of the doorknob and sighs. "What do you want?"

"My freedom?" she answers in disbelief, as if he's oblivious and should have known that already.

"No deal," he says coldly. "I'll find someone else."

"Wait!" She extends a desperate hand out toward him and he has to force down a triumphant smile. "Wait." She takes in a deep breath. "Okay, I'll do it. But you have to release Toph!"

"The blind one?"

"You already have plenty of earthbenders. You won't even miss her." Katara's one blue eye is wide and swirling with emotions.

Zuko stares at her unblinkingly for a moment. "I'll think about it." He opens his door and starts to make his exit. "I'll be back later. Be ready."

* * *

><p>The sun is setting and casting a red glow over the palace gates. Zuko walks through them with purpose, Katara right on his heels.<p>

"Are we going through the marketplace?" she asks, a tremor in her voice. Zuko supposes he can't really blame her for her nerves. The last time he brought her to the marketplace was not a pleasant experience for her.

"We're going around it."

He hears her exhale in relief.

They move away from the entrance to the marketplace which, despite the late hour, is bustling with activity, and walk into a well lit back alley that leads into a quarter of the upper ring that specifically houses noble homes.

The homes are extravagant, but Zuko barely notices them as he passes by. He almost makes it to the end of the street when he realizes that he can no longer hear Katara's footsteps. He pauses and glances over his shoulder. She's standing at the other end of the street and staring up at a nobleman's house with complete and utter awe.

He marches back up to her and grabs her elbow. "No time to ogle, waterbender."

"They're so gorgeous," she says breathlessly, causing Zuko to roll his eyes.

"It's just a house," he grumbles and gives her arm a firm yank. She begins to follow him again.

"I've never lived in a house before. Not really." Her voice sounds wistful.

"No. Now you just live in the finest palace in the world." Zuko keeps an ear out so that he'll notice if she happens to stop trailing him again.

"It's not the same." A moment later the waterbender is at his side, her footsteps echoing with his.

They zip through a couple more streets—Katara slows down whenever something particularly luxurious catches her eye—until the Dragonheart Teashop comes into view.

"Are you not worried about being recognized?" Katara asks.

Zuko shrugs. He's wearing "regular" clothes, or the most regular looking clothes that were in his closet, and he has his hair up in a normal topknot, no crown in sight. "Maybe."

Katara, for her part, is dressed in black from head to toe. Zuko would expect nothing less from someone who used to snoop around for a living.

The teashop is surrounded by customers, most of them dressed in fine silken robes and flaunting their wealth to anyone who will pay attention long enough. The normal clientele for the Dragonheart.

Zuko walks right up to the door and steps inside, and a bell dings, announcing a new customer. Katara follows suit.

The waterbender stops behind him, right at the entrance, her blue eye darting about the room and taking in every detail. When she seems familiar enough with her surroundings she gives Zuko one sharp nod and they quickly grab an unoccupied table with two chairs. A waitress trots up to them with a menu in hand but when she opens her mouth to greet them Zuko cuts her off.

"I want to talk to the owner."

The waitress' customer-friendly smile falters. "I apologize, sir." Her amber eyes scan over him and she flushes. Zuko would bet that he's just been identified. "We haven't, erm, we haven't seen Owner Len in a couple of days."

Zuko looks her right in the eye. "Then can I speak to his second in command?"

The waitress nods rapidly and disappears into the crowd. Seconds later a plump, haggard looking woman makes her way over to them. There are dark circles under her eyes. She must be Shang Len's husband.

"Can I help you?" she asks when she reaches their table. She sounds tired.

"Yes, I was hoping to speak to your husband but he doesn't seem to be here this evening. I own a space for a teashop on Ember Island I wanted to talk with him about the possibility of the Dragonheart opening up a second shop."

The woman nods and begins talking about how she and her currently missing husband _had _talked about expanding.

Zuko stops listening after that. He tries to catch Katara's gaze but she's keeping an eye on everyone else in the shop but him. This is good. This means she's doing her job.

Zuko nods and "mmhmms" in all the right places until the woman announces that she'll be back in a minute, she just needs to go and get some paperwork for him to fill out.

"Who'd you see?" Zuko questions immediately after the woman walks out of earshot.

Katara shakes her head and glares at him. "You're not going to tell that poor woman that her husband is _dead?_"

"Nope." He leans back in his chair and levels his stare on her. "Who'd you see?"

"That's cruel," she spits. "I'm going to tell her." She goes to stand.

"You tell her and I swear on Agni himself that I will leave scars on the unblemished side of your pretty little face." His hand curls along the edge of the table. Smoke rises between his fingers. The waterbender looks at him with dislike but says nothing.

"Now," Zuko grits out. "_Who did you see?"_

"Someone in the corner," she answers sharply.

"Female?"

"Don't know, didn't see their face. They were wearing a hood. I couldn't see their eyes or anything, but I could tell that they were watching us."

"Which means that they probably know that _you _were watching _them_."

She pretends that she didn't hear him point this out. "Then they got up and left out the side door."

Zuko frowns down at the table. The hooded person might not be who he thinks it is, but if they _are_ then he knows exactly what they'll do in order to send him a message.

Zuko just has to give them a little time.

When the waitress moves within earshot Zuko catches her attention and orders a pot of jasmine tea.

He'll give the mystery person a quarter of an hour.

* * *

><p>It only takes twelve minutes. That's when the screaming starts right outside of the teashop.<p>

Zuko, Katara, and the majority of the other customers get up from their respective tables and make their way outside.

There's a hanging body across the street. A woman.

Zuko frowns and rubs a hand across his chin in thought. A suicide wasn't what he had in mind—

Katara is tugging on his sleeve. "Let's move forward. I need to get a closer look."

Zuko lights a fire in both of his palms. "Move!" He starts shoving random people aside and eventually the crowd parts for him and Katara. When they reach the body on the other side of the street she quickly leans around it before slowly nodding. Zuko is already amazed that she doesn't have to cover her nose. He can barely breathe himself.

"Scorch marks," she confirms. "This woman didn't hang herself."

Zuko's suspicions have been confirmed. "She's fucking with me."

The waterbender looks confused. "Who is?"

"My sister."

Katara's visible blue eye widens in realization and horror. "But why would anyone…why would she do something like this?" Her shoulders are trembling.

Zuko steps away from the body and looks up into the woman's face. She was Fen Chun, Zhao's most well known mistress and one of his biggest (and most annoying) supporters.

"She's trying to one-up me."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

Hee. Long time no see! First off, a big thank you to everyone who left a review or sent a message! I really appreciate all of the encouragement! I'm lucky to have such awesome readers. I'm happy to say that I'm about 93% sure that I'm over my writer's block, so I'm ready to move forward again with this story. Admittedly, I wasn't expected the story to take this sort of turn (I had originally planned for less dead bodies), but I hope everyone is still on board. I hope you're all ready for the ride that's coming!

Also, big news to those of you who watch The Legend of Korra! It was revealed today that Zuko is still alive! That makes him and Katara the last two remaining members of the original Gaang. I don't know about you guys, but I'm holding out for some super adorable old people Zutara bonding scenes. Those of you who are on tumblr already know this (my URL is likeadove(dot)tumblr(dot)com by the way and I blog about everything and nothing), but I just wanted to share and fangirl with you guys! SO EXCITED. :D

Anyway, that's the end of my long winded author's note. I hope everyone enjoyed the chapter and please leave me a review and let me know your thoughts!


	8. Wasted

Driven by the strangle of vein  
>Showing no mercy I'd do it again<br>Open up your eyes  
>You keep on crying<br>Baby I'll bleed you dry  
>Skies are blinking at me<br>I see a storm bubbling up from the sea

And it's coming closer.

-"Closer", Kings of Leon

* * *

><p>There's blood.<p>

There's so much blood.

It coats his hands, runs down his dual swords, splatters against his cheeks. The metallic smell of it is overriding his senses, but he doesn't find it appalling like he should. He is surrounded by the color of blood, but it doesn't bother Zuko. He's always been fond of the color red.

And then he sees her, the waterbender. There's something wrong with her face. Where her scars are supposed to be there is now a burn instead. It's hideous; it's crumpled and bright red, still oozing.

He glances down and sees that his palm is on fire. Katara is screaming and she's trying to get away from him, as if he is a curse that she has to escape.

_He did this to her._

He laughs and laughs and laughs.

Zuko doesn't jerk awake. His eyes simply open. But his breathing is labored and he's covered in a sheen of sweat. He rolls onto his side and stares at the wall, trying to erase the images in his head.

But they won't go away. It's as if someone has burned them into his memory.

* * *

><p>"Rough night?"<p>

Zuko shoots the guard the foulest glare that he can manage, and the man quickly mutters an apology and ducks his head.

In truth, Zuko _did_ have a rough night. Nightmares plagued him to the point where he'd stopped trying to get any sleep, so he'd stayed awake and had watched the sun rise, hoping to draw energy from it.

He's in his office, staring numbly at the paperwork that's littered all over his desk. He's too tired to bother trying to sort through it and get any of it done. All he wants to do is _sleep_.

But instead this guard is standing before him telling him that the waterbender is outside and that she's supposed to see him.

Zuko groans and waves at the guard to let her in.

The first thing he does when she walks in is stare at the side of her face that's always covered by a curtain of hair. He can't quite make them out, but he knows that that her scars are still there, hidden. They're not _burns_, he reminds himself. And even more importantly, _they're not his fault._

"Rough night?" Katara says, casually repeating the guard's sentiments.

Zuko can't muster up the energy to glare at her too. "Shut up," he grumbles, averting his gaze away from her eyes. He can't bring himself to keep eye contact this morning. "What do you want? Why do you keep bugging me?"

She quirks her one visible eyebrow and he can tell that she'd like to spit out something snarky. Instead, she says, "You summoned me, remember?"

Zuko frowns and narrows his eyes at her. "No, I didn't."

She narrows her eyes right back. "Yes, you did. You sent out the order yesterday evening." Her lips tilt down into a frown, and he's surprised to see that she looks slightly concerned. "You really did have a rough night, huh?"

"What's it to you, waterbender?" he snaps, frustrated. He _did _send out the summons order last night and he'd completely forgotten. How un-princely of him. He's supposed to be on top of mundane things like this.

The trace of concern vanishes from the visible half of her face and she glares down at the floor, not saying anything.

"Anyway," Zuko bites out, "I want you to search my sister's room and let me know if you come up with something, anything that might indicate where she might be—"

"And what the goal of her mission is?" Katara interrupts, ahead of herself.

Zuko sighs. He's starting to get a headache. "No. I _know _what her mission is."

"You haven't explained it to me yet. Just that she's trying to 'one up you'," Katara points out.

"That's because you don't need to know any more than that. Search her room and let me know if you find anything."

Katara's lowers her head in embarrassment and Zuko notices that her visible cheek has turned bright red. She mutters something under her breath.

"What was that?"

"I'vealreadysearchedherroom."

"_What was that?"_

"I've already searched Princess Azula's rooms!" she exclaims.

"WHAT?" Zuko immediately starts to get to his feet but Katara waves her hands around rapidly, trying to maintain his attention.

"It's just, I knew that that'd be the first place to start—"

"And did your guards just_ let_ you waltz into my sister's room and _search it?"_

The waterbender quickly shakes her head, still looking somewhat embarrassed. "No! It wasn't their fault! I'm… just very good at persuading."

Zuko braces his palms against his desk and levels Katara with the most furious look he can manage. "You don't just walk into a royal's room without permission, even if that royal isn't there. Actions like that can get you severely punished, even killed." To emphasis his statement he pulls up one of his hands and lights a bright, blazing fire in his palm.

And suddenly all he can think about is his nightmare. This Katara doesn't shrink back in fear. She doesn't try to get away from him. Instead she crosses her arms over her chest and looks at him as if he's a petulant child that she's using up all her patience in order to deal with him. She's not afraid of the potential pain. She's not afraid of _pain _at all.

_Maybe she should be_.

Zuko snaps his fingers closed and carelessly allows some sparks to fly out of his hand. One lands on the back of Katara's thumb and she jerks a bit at the burn, but otherwise doesn't react.

He wonders, not for the first time, if Katara isn't afraid of the pain, but that she's just simply used to it.

"You're not going to ask me if I found anything?" she pipes up, sounding anxious.

He tilts his golden eyes back up toward the ceiling and sits down into his chair. He's _so _exhausted. "What did you find?" he asks, remembering that this is important to him, that he _has _to find his sister.

"Nothing," she answers immediately. "Absolutely nothing."

"Well, then," he drawls, "I'm glad you risked capital punishment for _absolutely nothing_."

"I know where we can go for information," she states firmly. "The people there are always willing to spill what they know, as long as you have the coin."

Zuko frowns, but nods. "Where?"

Half of Katara's mouth tilts up into an expression that could be considered devious. Zuko isn't sure if he likes this or not. "Summon me tonight, Prince Zuko."

Then she turns and leaves, without waiting for him to properly dismiss her.

* * *

><p>He's dressed in all black and he's left his hair out of its usual top knot. It spills a ways past his shoulders, long and raven colored, just like his father's. Zuko sighs and rubs his temples. A very large part of him would rather stay in this evening, preferably in bed.<p>

But the knock sounds at his door and he rolls his shoulders in preparation. "Come in."

When the waterbender steps inside his office his jaw nearly unhinges itself and falls to the floor.

Katara has officially struck him stupid.

She's wearing the dress that she wore to the banquet, except she's removed about half of the fabric. She's reworked the neckline so that it plunges to just above her navel, exposing the sides of her breasts. Zuko can't help but stare like an idiot because they're right _there_.

The dress now ends above her knees. Before it had been floor length. Her shapely calves are exposed and Zuko lets the complete image of her imprint itself into his mind so that he can recall it later. Preferably in private.

His gaze trails back up her body to once again locks onto her chest. That's when he notices the outline of her dark nipples through the thin fabric of her dress.

He swallows thickly. For the first time, she's not just an annoying waterbender; she's an annoying waterbender who he might like to _fuck._

He shakes that thought out of his head quickly and blurts out the first thing that comes to his mind. "You look like a prostitute."

And then, for some unimaginable reason, Katara's face lights up. "Really? That's great! I was worried that I hadn't made the skirt short enough—"

"Okay." Zuko's voice comes out husky and lower than usual. He quickly clears his throat. "_Why_ are you dressed like a prostitute?"

One corner of her mouth tilts up into a half smile. "Because we're going to a brothel. You see, Prince Zuko, people _talk _when they're happy."

* * *

><p>They've both opted to leave the palace on foot again, and this particular district in the upper ring is bustling with people, mostly adults. There's a small crowd hanging about the brothel, and they're all eating, drinking, and flirting.<p>

Zuko can tell that Katara is starting to get anxious from the way that she's walking. Her steps are jerky and every few minutes she sucks in a deep breath, as if she's attempting to calm herself.

They've both remained relatively silent, although Zuko can't help sneaking glimpses of her out of the corner of his eye. He can literally see down her dress.

"Have you ever been to this place before?" Katara asks, voice shaky with nerves. She's staring up ahead, visible blue eye wide.

Zuko glares at the side of her face that's facing him, insulted. "Of course not. I've never had to _pay_." All of his partners are willing. More than willing, actually. Half of them are hoping that he'll knock them up.

He half expects a snippy response from her, but her gaze doesn't waver from the building ahead of them. She nods slowly, accepting his answer.

They finally reach the outside of the brothel and Zuko stands behind Katara, waiting for her to be the first one to walk in. It's strange, he thinks, to be following someone else's lead for once.

She briefly hesitates and then quickly reaches up and pulls her hair back and out of her face with a long, blue ribbon. Then her scars are on complete display and Zuko slowly takes them in. They don't look quite as gruesome as he had remembered them.

"Men like mystery," she mumbles before Zuko can even open his mouth to ask the question. "My face is a mystery."

The light pouring out of the brothel catches her scars, defining them. Zuko frowns, tilts his head to the side, and calculates his next question. It' technically rude, but he's too curious. "How did you get them?"

Katara slowly turns her head and looks up at him suspiciously. She doesn't answer, but moves to the brothel and steps inside. Zuko sighs and quietly follows her. She'll eventually tell him. She has to.

There are people _everywhere _and the air is thick with the smell of perfume. Women are leaning on men, touching them suggestively, and laughing too loudly at bad jokes. Zuko has to fight down the urge to turn around and leave and instead fixates his gaze on the back of Katara's shoulders. She quickly leads him into a corner and then turns around to survey the room.

"I have to go find the Madame," she says sharply. "Tell her I'm interested in working for the night. Then I'll try to find a regular customer. They always know the latest gossip."

Zuko frowns. "But it's just gossip."

Blue eyes turn and lock onto him. "You'll find that gossip turns out to have a lot more merit then you might think. Especially over situations like the one your sister is causing."

"How do you know so much about brothels anyway?"

Suddenly Katara can't keep his gaze. Her eyes drift down to the floor. "I used to work in one."

"I'm _sorry_?"

"It was when I was young." Her cheeks are growing pink. "I wasn't even a woman yet, I didn't _perform_ or anything."

The thought of her working in this type of environment makes Zuko feel slightly sick to his stomach. For some reason the idea of her running around with a bounty hunter and investigating dead bodies is much easier for him to swallow.

"I'll be back soon," Katara vows and moves to walk away from him.

He quickly catches her elbow. He _hates _feeling unsure but… "What am I supposed to do while you're gone?"

She rolls his eyes at him. "You're in a brothel. You're a wealthy prince. Figure something out." And then she's walking away and disappearing into the crowd of people.

An hour and a half later Zuko is basically drunk and has come to the conclusion that he _loves _brothels. He's sitting at a round table playing cards with four other men and two whores whose tits are practically falling out of their tops. There's a half empty bottle of whiskey next to him and Zuko picks it up and takes a swig, all the while being careful not to let anyone else at the table see the cards in his hands.

Zuko doesn't like cheaters, which is ironic.

The man to his right folds, laughing hysterically at something one of the girls is whispering in his ear. Then he smacks her on the ass and they both get up and move towards the staircase to where the bedrooms presumably are.

That's when another girl moseys on over and takes the now empty seat. "Well, aren't you pretty," she purrs, eyeing Zuko up and down and smirking at him. "I've always had a soft spot for pretty boys." She slides her chair closer to Zuko's and trails her hand down his arm.

This is where Zuko's self control begins to slip a little. He has enough coins lining his pockets; he could buy any girl he wanted, and this one was fairly good looking with a nice mouth. But then he remembers that he'd have to _buy _her and his pride gets in the way.

Zuko is the Prince of the Fire Nation. He'll _never _pay.

He swats the girl's hand away and forces himself to turn all of his attention onto the card game. Soon it's time to lay down his hand. He wins again and happily collects the coins that are sitting in the middle of the table. Then he takes another swig of his whiskey and orders a bottle of wine for the girl.

No, he won't pay for her services, but he's willing to bet that he could get her to do anything that he wanted for free.

Forty minutes fly by and Zuko's not so sure that he can feel his legs.

The girl is drunk, a lightweight, and she's sitting in his lap and happily shouting and joking with the other working girls sitting at the table.

Zuko's hand of cards is promising, but not all that exciting, which isn't very good for him right now. He got it in his mind that because of his winning streak he won't lose at all tonight.

So he bet that he'd got off all his hair.

He has a feeling that he'll come to regret this decision.

And then he's laying down his hand and he's _lost _and the other men are roaring with laughter at the horrified look on his face.

"Not my hair," he slurs out, feeling stricken. The girl in his lap is stroking his jaw and giggling and her long, black hair is sticking to her neck. She places a sloppy kiss onto his ear, causing Zuko to shift a little bit in his seat.

Then the man on the other side of the table stands up and pulls out his knife. "Come on, pretty boy. It's just hair."

Zuko lights a fire in his palm and tries to get to his feet. But his legs give out from underneath him and he tumbles to the floor. He rolls over and all he can hear is _laughing _and he's so hot right now and his head is _pounding _and _where is Katara_?

The girl is helping him onto his feet and he grasps her shoulder and sways in place. The man who beat him at this hand of cards, the man with the knife is shaking his fist at him and spouting out things about honor and how Zuko _has _to give up his hair because that's what he bet and if he loved his hair so much then he shouldn't have been a smug bastard and bet on it in the first place.

Zuko finds himself shoved back down into his chair while the man saws off his hair. Zuko watches his raven locks fall to the floor and a bitter part of him wonders if he'll look so much like his father now.

He muses that he probably won't and that maybe that's a good thing.

His new, short hair now falls a bit into his eyes and Zuko's stomach rolls with nausea. Then the girl's tongue is in his mouth and her hand is in his pants. He realizes that he'll have to add public fucking to the list of un-princely things that he's managed to accomplish in his nineteen years.

Someone grabs a fistful of his now short hair and hauls him up and out of his chair. He reacts blindly, swinging two fistfuls of fire at his attacker. He hears a sharp intake of pain and then he's being practically thrown out of the brothel and onto the street.

It's raining and the cool water soaks into his skin and Zuko breaths in deeply, trying to make his head stop spinning.

Then someone is crouching down in front of him and the only thing he can register is blue, blue eyes and a face that would be beautiful if it wasn't marred by three long scars.

"—even understand me?" she's saying, slapping his face a bit.

He nods and manages to get to his feet without her help. "What'd you find?" he bites out, swallowing back a groan.

"I'm not telling you," Katara snaps. "You'll have forgotten it all by morning."

Somewhere in the back of his mind Zuko is able to register that this is a fair point, so he doesn't argue. He does, however, fall to his knees and puke violently.

There's a noise of disgust from overhead. He spits out the sour remains in his mouth and forces himself to look up at her. "You're going to leave me," he states, because that's what makes sense to him. That's what any normal person, _prisoner_ would do.

Katara is quiet for a long time. "No. Not because I don't want to, but because I have some honor."

_Unlike some people I know_, he finishes in his head. She doesn't say it, but Zuko can almost hear her voice form the words.

Slim fingers reache under his elbow and pulls him to his feet. Katara puts a hand on his back and pushes him forward and eventually Zuko settles into a rhythm of walking, occasionally stumbling. He can't remember the last time he's been this drunk.

They make it a couple of blocks down the street when Zuko sees it. Someone is stretched out in the middle of the road in front of them.

"Katara—" he starts, but she's already left him and has sprinted to the side of the person. Zuko's feet move forward on their own accord and soon he's leaning down and looking at the body.

It's the girl he had spent the majority of the evening with. Her throat has been slashed and there's blood all over the scant amount of clothes that she had been wearing.

"She's dead. She's dead." The girl's face is white as snow and her empty eyes stare up at the raining sky above her. Zuko's vision swims and he bites back the bile building up in his throat. Azula had been there. She had been watching him.

This doesn't have anything to do with politics or their father. This is in cold blood.

"What is your sister trying to prove?" Katara cries out, voice high with fear. This murder must have taken place in the past ten minutes or so. That's how long ago they left the brothel.

Zuko knows exactly what Azula's trying to prove, although he can't bring himself to say anything to the waterbender standing next to him. His tongue feels too heavy and a strong rage towards his sister swims through his veins. He sways on his feet and then falls to the street. The ground is wet from the rain, but when he pulls his hands up to his face they're dark with the girl's blood.

_Blood._

He'd practically signed her death certificate, poor thing.

When he glances back up at the body he doesn't see the girl from the brothel, but the dark skinned waterbender. Her throat isn't slit, but there's a large burn on her neck instead. Her blue eyes are open and void of all life and all Zuko can think is that _he did this_.

Someone's cool hand is moving his hair away from his eyes and when he looks up he sees that same waterbender with a burn on her neck. He scrambles away, his head spinning. "I've killed you," he spits out, voice barely audible over the pouring rain.

Katara is rapidly shaking her head but isn't she supposed to be _dead on the ground_?

"No, you—"

"I burned you. You're dead. No. _She _killed you, you're going to die—"

He vomits again and starts to shiver uncontrollably. He's not sure what's going on, just that he's surrounded by death and betrayal. He cannot trust anyone, not even himself, but especially not _her_. He can see her golden eyes in his mind and they're lit up with fire, just like his.

* * *

><p>He wakes up in his bed. He's not sure how he's in his bed, but he is in his bed.<p>

His head is killing him and he's sick to his stomach, but he yanks back his silken sheets and gets up. He grabs a shirt and a pair of pants, throws them on and marches out of his room, ignoring the call of his guards.

When he gets to the waterbender's room his hand hesitates over the doorknob before he slowly brings his fist up and knocks.

There's a polite "come in" and then he's stepping inside.

Katara doesn't look very good, but that's not the first thing that jumps out at Zuko. There's a bright red burn on her neck.

"Who did that's to you?" he asks, voice sharp as a whip.

Katara frowns. "You did, at the brothel."

The truth hits him like a ton of bricks. He vaguely recalls striking out at someone with hands filled with fire. He opens his mouth but cannot bring himself to apologize.

"You look awful," Katara points out, slowly rising from her makeshift desk and crossing her room to stand in front of him.

"What did you find out?" he asks immediately, forcing himself to concentrate on something besides the burn on the waterbender's neck. He watches Katara as she fidgets slightly and looks away from him, clearly uncomfortable.

"She has a list, your sister. A list of people she wants to murder. That's what everyone was whispering about last night, anyway." She turns her head back to him and looks Zuko right in the eyes. "The way she's acting, it sounds as if she's snapped. This isn't the behavior of someone who's spent the majority of her life being the perfect princess. Did you…did you do something to set her off?"

"No," Zuko lies.

Katara doesn't look disappointed; she looks suspicious.

He wonders if he'll eventually have to spit out the truth.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

**Truth about what, I wonder? *ponders***

**Sorry for the delay! I've felt really distracted lately, what with Korra and Game of Thrones, plus my sister-in-law had her baby a couple of days ago and that's easily taken up the majority of my free time this week.**

**But anyway, I'm exciting for what's coming up in this story and hope you are too! I am sorry for not replying to reviews this time around, but figured you guys wouldn't mind too much as long as you got an update! I do appreciate every single one of the reviews that I get, so thank you, my readers, for being so awesome!**

**Love you guys and hope to hear your thoughts! :)**


	9. Dread

Cause you told me that I would find a hole,  
>Within the fragile substance of my soul<br>And I have filled this void with things unreal,  
>And all the while my character it steals<p>

Darkness is a harsh term don't you think?  
>And yet it dominates the things I see.<p>

—_Roll Away Your Stone_, Mumford & Sons

* * *

><p>Ozai is furious in his cold, cold way.<p>

Zuko can no longer wear his crown on top of his head, as his hair is too short. He's managed to pin his crown to the front of his silken shirt, but it looks fairly ridiculous. All of the servants that he passed in the halls this morning either smirked at him or hid their laughter behind their hands.

He was too humiliated to yell at them.

Now he's in the Fire Lord's office and his father's scrutiny is making him sweat.

"How could you act so foolishly?" Ozai asks with obvious irritation as he laces his fingers together on top of his desk.

Zuko swallows. "I do apologize, father. I was not thinking clearly at the time."

Ozai's gaze narrows in at his son. "Princes of the Fire Nation do not wear their hair like mere peasant boys. Do you realize how idiotic you look at this moment?"

Zuko ducks his head. "Yes, sir."

Ozai lets out a low, disappointed sigh and Zuko feels shame crawl up his spine. "Nevertheless, your new choice in hairstyle is not why I called you in here." His upper lip curls and his mouth forms a snarl. "You were seen the night before last, in a _brothel_, Prince Zuko." His voice lowers dangerously. "What was my son doing in a brothel?"

Zuko's head twitches a bit as he tries to move his bangs out of his line of sight. "I was trying to find Azula."

"You were playing cards with _whores_!" Ozai roars. He stands up, palms laid out flat on top of his desk. "You were seen drunk, being dragged out of the establishment by that waterbender!" After a beat he straightens up, walks around his desk and stands in front of his son. Zuko feels his fingers start to tremble, so he quickly folds his hands together and places them behind his back.

"Azula," Ozai says slowly, "might be a little out of sorts in her current state, but at least she knows how to act with some decorum!"

Zuko nods quickly. "Father, I'm truly—"

His words are cut off when Ozai smacks him in the back of his head. Zuko stares down at the floor and forces himself to bite his tongue.

The Fire Lord pokes Zuko in the shoulder. "You will never embarrass me like that again, do you understand me?"

"Yes, father."

"And I do not want to hear another word about that waterbender leaving palace ground with you, either. You're to start her Interviews as soon as possible."

All the words that Zuko had been about to say suddenly stick in the back of his throat. "She only just turned seventeen, father. Perhaps we should wait a little longer until we start her Interviews?" It's a lie, technically. Zuko really isn't sure how long she's been seventeen. She could already be eighteen, for all he knows.

Ozai seems unfazed. "I don't see why that matters all that much. Start them." His frown deepens as he gives Zuko one last once over. "Leave."

Zuko immediately turns around and walks out of his father's office without a word.

* * *

><p>He wakes up a couple of days later next to a cook's assistant.<p>

He's slept with her before, which is probably why she rolls out of bed, gathers her clothes, and makes her way to the door without making a sound. She's familiar with Zuko's routine.

Her watches her silently from where he's still lying in his bed. It feels like something heavy is sitting on top of his chest, which he thinks is unusual and unpleasant. It's like he's feeling guilty, and Zuko doesn't like to feel guilty over things as casual as fucking.

The young woman pauses, her fingers curling around the doorknob. She turns back to Zuko and ducks her head in respect. "Have a wonderful day, Prince Zuko. It was a pleasure, as always," she says politely.

"Tai," Zuko acknowledges her with a nod of his head.

The girl's green eyes go wide and she looks shell-shocked. For a long moment she stays completely still, gaping at him.

Scowling, Zuko sits up in his bed. He doesn't like it when people linger in his room like this. "What?" he snaps out, growing irritated.

Tai blushes and lowers her gaze. "I apologize, Prince Zuko, it's just that you've never bothered to remember my name before." And with that she exits the room, making sure to close the door quietly behind her.

Zuko stares at the space where she had been standing for quite some time. She had a point; he usually never bothered to remember his playmates names. It had always seemed inconsequential to him. Scoffing, he climbs out of his bed and makes his way into his bathroom.

That stupid waterbender is beginning to rub off on him. How annoying.

* * *

><p>After a late breakfast and three cups of tea, Zuko forces himself to go to Katara's room. If he were to say that he hadn't been avoiding her these past couple of days then he'd be lying to himself. Ozai's orders had left him with a terrible feeling in the pit of his stomach. Katara would not take well to being paraded in front of a bunch of potential suitors like a prized horse. Her Interviews were going to be…interesting, to say the least.<p>

He dreaded breaking the news to her.

When he rounds the corner to the hallway where her room is, he sees a swarm of guards, more then there should be, crowding outside of Katara's room.

Zuko's footsteps quicken automatically. He shoves men roughly out of his way as he reaches to shove open her door. He has a bad feeling. He has a _very _bad feeling.

The first thing he sees is the waterbender covered in blood.

He immediately scans her, trying to see where the blood is coming from. If someone has harmed her then they would have to be punished, severely and swiftly.

"It's not mine." Her voice is small, much smaller than he's ever heard it before. He walks right up to Katara and crouches down in front of her. The metallic smell of the blood hits him like a ton of bricks and he wrenches back, wincing.

"Then whose is it?" he asks, eyes looking over the room. Zuko thinks that everything seems in order until he notices the broken window.

Katara gestured to one of her silken pillow cases. It's sitting on the floor, and after a moment Zuko realizes that she's stuffed something inside of it. Something that's leaking.

Steeling himself, he stands up straight and parts the opening of the pillow case and peers inside. He sees matted, bloodied hair. He lets out a breath and backs away.

"You there." He points to Katara's head guard. "Take this head and bring it to the mortician. I'll be there in ten minutes to help identify…it, er, them."

The guard is already turning green, but he ducks his head and gathers up the pillow case anyway. Zuko waves away the rest of Katara's guards away and as soon as they leave he rounds on the waterbender.

"When did this happen?" he spits out furiously. "Why wasn't I informed immediately?"

Katara still looks thunderstruck. She gets up off the floor and plops down on the edge of her bed, expression blank. "It only just happened. It just, it came in through the window. I don't even know how you'd be able to reach that window but…" she trails off, suddenly looking sick. She presses her wrist against her mouth as if to hold back her own vomit.

"Do you need a bowl?" Zuko asks. His voice comes out softer then he'd expected.

Katara slowly shakes her head. "No. I'll be okay. I just need a minute."

So Zuko gives her a minute. He grabs the chair by her desk and straddles it, never taking his eye off the waterbender. More than one minute passes and Katara starts to grow more and more distraught. Finally she lifts her head and meets Zuko's gaze. "It must be a warning of some sort, from you sister. I guess she's telling me to stay out of this, this _game_ you two are playing!" she exclaims shrilly, accusation crossing her face.

"You think that this is a _game_?" Zuko growls, leaning forward. "This is something much beyond that. You have no idea, _no idea_ what it's like, what being her brother is like." Then he snaps his mouth shut, forcing himself to be quiet.

Katara doesn't seem intimidated by his harsh tone, but the accusation on her face dies. It's replaced with pity. "People are being murdered over a sibling rivalry." She looks disgusted and for a long while Zuko can't bring himself to meet his golden eyes with her blue ones.

He doesn't feel ashamed, but whatever he does feel is close enough to shame to make him feel on edge. He decides to change the subject slightly. "It's not a warning."

Katara rolls her eyes. "I don't see what else it could be."

Zuko frowns. "You don't know my sister. She's never been courteous enough to warn people before she hurts them. That's not how she works." He taps his fingers against the wood of the chair. "This message, it's an invitation."

* * *

><p>Three hours later he's back in his room, writing a letter to his Uncle and sipping on a cup of tea.<p>

He thinks he might actually send this one. Maybe. Perhaps.

The truth is, he'll probably end up sticking it in one of his drawers, the one where all the other unsent letters are. There the letter will sit until he either forgets about it or writes a new letter.

This time, instead of sticking it in the drawer, he slides the letter over to the corner of his desk. Maybe he'll remember to send it later, or maybe he'll set it on fire.

He picks up his teacup and finishes his remaining tea in one large gulp. He still hasn't told the waterbender about her upcoming Interviews. Part of him feels a little sorry for her, since she had a decapitated head thrown into her bedroom this morning. He wonders if maybe he should leave her be for the rest of the day, and deal with talking to her tomorrow. But he can't. He needs to settle this conflict with Azula once and for all.

Besides, Zuko has never been one to procrastinate because he's anxious about something. Zuko is _not _a coward.

He forces himself out of his desk chair and leaves his room. Ten minutes later he's knocking on Katara's door, eyebrows already furrowed in concentration.

When she answers her door he notices how pale she looks, paler then he's ever seen her before. Her eye is wide and nervous and she glances over his shoulder to check if anyone is behind him.

"Yes?" she grits out, a little unsteady on her feet.

"We're going out. I have to talk to you about something important."

Her visible blue eye narrows a little. "Don't think I don't remember what you said earlier today. Azula sent me an invitation by way of head. I'm not going _anywhere_."

Zuko almost snorts. "You used to be a bounty hunter and you're _scared_?"

Katara looks offended. "First of all, I worked _with_ a bounty hunter. I assisted her, that was all. Second of all, most of the people that we looked for weren't psycho princesses wrecking havoc on her own Capitol City."

"Careful," Zuko warns softly. "I wouldn't insult Princess Azula in front of so many witnesses."

Katara glances around her, for the first time realizing that Zuko is still standing outside of her bedroom, and that her guards and random servants are still in complete earshot of her and Zuko's conversation.

Her shoulders slump in defeat. "Can't we just talk inside?"

Zuko's eyes flick to the side of her face that's covered with her hair. He can't look her in the eye, not after what he's about to do. "No, we can't. Be ready in five minutes."

She grumbles furiously underneath her breath, but five minutes later she's ready in her simple black clothes. Zuko reminds himself that he'll have to get nicer outfits made for her, especially before she starts her Interviews.

He leads her outside of the palace gates, but he doesn't lead her to any specific district. He takes her to a restaurant that's located right outside of the palace, just before the marketplace.

The both of them are seated immediately. Since he is the Prince, he's given priority seating. He and Katara are immediately brought a pot of jasmine tea. Katara moves to pour herself a cup, but Zuko stops her. She frowns at him, but her blue eyes lights up with understanding as a woman in a fancy dress and a painted face slides up to them with a smile.

Zuko jolts in surprise. "Ty Lee?"

"Hello, Zuko!" she responds cheerfully, placing one hand on his shoulder and picking up the teapot with the other. "Is it just you and your new plaything this evening?"

Katara's frown turns into a scowl.

"She's not my plaything," Zuko corrects his old friend sharply. "But yes, it's just the two of us this evening." He scans his golden eyes around the restaurant, trying to remember every detail about the place. Unfortunately, he doesn't see who he's looking for.

He looks back up at Ty Lee. "Since when did you start working here?"

Ty Lee gives him a sultry smile. "It's _fun_," she says, putting emphasis on the last word. "You know how I like to have fun, Prince Zuko, and how I enjoy giving other people a good time as well." She shrugs. "Plus, I'm getting paid for it."

Zuko glances back over at the waterbender. Katara is staring at her empty teacup and looking completely unamused.

Finally, Ty Lee pours them both their tea and trots away, promising to return with the Chef's Special.

Zuko laces his fingers together and props them up on top of the table, ignoring the fact that Katara is staring two holes into his forehead.

"So," she begins, "what is it that you wanted to talk to me about?"

Zuko grimaces, dread already forming in the pit of his stomach, but it doesn't matter. He never gets the chance to tell Katara about her Interviews in that moment.

Because the person he had been scanning the restaurant for earlier is now standing in the middle of the floor. Her piercing gold eyes meet up with his and Zuko feels a wave of anticipation wash over him.

"On behalf of your Princess, I must ask everyone to leave immediately!"

Noise erupts all over the restaurant as customers realize that the Mad Princess Azula is standing under the same roof as they are. People rise from their chairs and sprint toward the front doors in a panic. Zuko, however, remains in his seat, calmly watching his sister revel in the chaos.

"Did you use me as bait?" Katara accuses, her eye alight with fury.

Zuko is too excited for the conversation to come to feel ashamed. "I told you, that head was an invitation."

Katara slams her first down onto the table. "An invitation that I didn't want to accept, you selfish bastard!"

Zuko rolls his eyes and shakes his head. "You helped me find my sister. You should be proud of yourself."

Something flashes across Katara's face: fear. For the first time since this morning, Zuko begins to feel guilty. He didn't mean to drag the waterbender into this mess. He could understand why she might be afraid. The words pop out of his mouth before he can think them through. "Don't worry. I won't let anything happen to you."

Katara's blue eye widens in shock and she quickly looks away from him, a blush blooming across her cheek. "Whatever," she mumbles.

Zuko looks back toward his sister. She's watching him from where she's standing in the now empty restaurant. "Zuzu," she greets, head cocked to the side.

"Azula," he returns. "You've been up to no good lately, don't you think?"

Her gaze narrows but she smirks. "Up to no good? Why, Zuzu, I'm just trying to make a statement, that's all."

Zuko stands up and takes a few steps toward his sister, trying to seem like he isn't intimidated by her. "If by 'making a statement' you mean 'upsetting father', then yes, I'd say you're making one hell of a statement."

Azula's smirk slips a little. "Father should be _proud_ of what I'm doing."

Zuko gives his sister a cold, calculated smile. "He's not. He's just embarrassed."

Azula lets out a cry of frustration, her blue fire coming to life in her palm. Zuko knows that he should feel apprehensive; his sister is an arguably better bender than he is, but he feels _nothing_. No fear, no pain, no anger. Just complete satisfaction that no matter what Azula does, Zuko is still the one that is on top.

He walks toward her, dodging fireballs and firewhips alike. He hasn't even started to bend yet, but right before he reaches his sister she darts back out of his reach.

Now she's standing on top of a table and she's no longer bending. She suddenly looks calm and collected. "Father is simply suffering from a temporary lapse in judgment. He'll come back to his senses soon." It sounds like she's saying it more to convince herself then to convince him.

"Really? From what I can recall, after the best trackers in the Capitol were sent out to find you but were unsuccessful, Father didn't even care. He didn't even have them executed for their failure. He just sent them on their merry little way."

Zuko almost laughs at the infuriated expression on his sister's face. "Face it, Azula. I beat you at your own game. Father sent out the order and_ I'm_ the one who answered him first, not you._ I'm_ the one who is going to be Fire Lord, _I'm_ the heir to the throne. Not. You."

Azula's upper lip curls into a snarl. She pulls back her arm, blue fire blazing in her palm, and Zuko takes in a deep breath slowly, preparing himself to dodge her fire and then unleash his own counterattack.

Then Azula's head jerks to the side. Blood from a long, thin cut dribbles down her cheek.

A small ice-dagger is sticking into the wall a ways behind Azula.

Both Zuko and his sister turn to stare at the brave, though stupid, waterbender. Katara is looking at Azula, mouth gaping open, stunned, as if she can't believe that she just sliced open the princess's cheek.

"You'll regret that little stunt, waterbender." And then Azula is flying at Katara and Zuko is moving before he can even process his own thoughts. He knocks his sister to the side before spinning back and kicking up fire at her.

Azula quickly rolls to her feet, but instead of continuing her assault on Katara she turns to the corner of the restaurant and shouts, "Ty Lee!"

Zuko's old childhood friend melts out of the shadows, still in her nice dress and face paint. She gives Zuko a somewhat apologetic look before somersaulting over to Katara and jabbing her in multiple places across her torso. Katara collapses, legs no longer able to keep her upright, and as she falls to the floor she hits her head on the table.

Something snaps inside of Zuko, and he turns to his sister with nothing but menace in his veins.

But Azula has already put away her fire, a smooth expression on her face. "Honestly, Zuzu, I'm not here to fight you. I just wanted to talk to you about what I'm doing. I guess, when I come back home, we can try to settle our differences again."

"You're not welcome back home," Zuko snarls. "Father and I will make sure of that."

"Don't be so dramatic, brother." Azula says with contempt. "I'll be back home soon enough. And I _will_ take back what is mine." She looks toward Katara and regards the now unconscious waterbender. "She's got spine. She's really making a wonderful addition to the Project. I imagine her Interviews are coming up soon?"

It's here and now that Zuko understands that his sister is well and truly mad. How she can go back and forth from murderous rage to talking about the Project, Zuko doesn't understand. Katara was right; Azula has completely and utterly snapped. He wonders if his sister will ever go back to being as she once was.

"Yes." Zuko takes careful steps in Katara's direction, quickly looking over her body for any signs of blood. Thankfully, he doesn't see anything.

"I see that the two of you have become friends," Azula observes. "That's why I sent the head through her window, not yours. I knew you'd take my message more seriously if I sent it to her, not you." With a cool smile his sister turns and disappears out the back of the restaurant, Ty Lee right on her heels.

Zuko stands still for a long moment, processing what Azula had just told him. Then he scoops Katara into his arms and makes his way out onto the street. It's nighttime now, but at least there aren't too many people wandering the streets just yet. The last thing he needs is for people to see him carrying a passed out waterbender back toward the palace.

As he crosses through the palace gates, Zuko begins to wonder if he's just as mad as his sister. And not because he had felt like he'd wanted to kill his own blood, and not because he'd felt so eerily calm in the midst of confronting his enemy. It's because he hadn't felt anything at all.

* * *

><p>Halfway to Katara's bedroom the waterbender wakes up and demands to be placed on her feet.<p>

"You'll fall," Zuko warns, but Katara squirms in his arms anyway, so he sets her down. Her knees buckle and she falls. Zuko doesn't help her get back up, instead choosing to watch her slowly climb back to her feet.

When they reach her bedroom, Katara waves him inside and then swiftly closes her door behind her.

"What the hell was that back there?" she says, voice low.

Zuko is now bone tired. He plops down on Katara's bed and looks at her from where he's lying. "A conversation between siblings," he states with a casual gesture with his hand.

Katara huffs and crosses her arms across her chest. "What did you mean when you said that you'd beaten her at her own game? And when you'd said you'd been the first to answer your father's order? And why did you bring me in the first place? And why did your sister send that head into my bedroom and not yours? And what was with that creepy chi blocking—"

"Shut. Up," Zuko grumbles. "None of the answers to those questions matter right now."

Muttering to herself, Katara pulls off her black clothes, leaving herself in only her under wraps. Zuko starts to feel hot, even though he's lying on top of her covers. Then he remembers what Katara did for him earlier. "Speaking of questions, why did you attack Azula? I would've handled myself perfectly fine without your assistance."

Katara walked to the other side of the bed and glared at him, indicating that he needed to get up. "If you're not going to answer any of my questions then I'm not going to answer any of yours. And for the record, your 'I won't let anything bad happen to you' spiel was total bullshit. That stupid waitress took away my bending and then knocked me out." She tugs on her blankets, once again signaling that he needs to get off her bed.

"Actually, you hit the table on your way down and knocked yourself out. That wasn't really Ty Lee's fault."

With a roll of her eyes Katara climbs under the covers on her side of the bed before rolling over and facing Zuko. Her hair falls back and away from her face, exposing her scars. She doesn't try to cover them up again. She looks tired, Zuko notes. Her eyes are already half closed.

"My sister called us friends," he says quietly, almost to himself.

Katara snorts from where she's laying at his side. "She's wrong. I hate you, you stupid Prince." But moments later she's fast asleep, and Zuko realizes that, despite everything, a level of trust has developed between the two of them, otherwise she would've never climbed into the bed.

For some reason this makes him feel light, lighter then he's felt in a long time.

He falls asleep soon enough.

* * *

><p>He wakes up to a knife at his throat.<p>

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

***dramatic music and then… DUNDUNDUN!***

**If that last scene seemed vaguely familiar to you, it's because I shamelessly stole it from **_**The Vampire Diaries**_**. Not the conversation, of course, but the whole bed thing. Delena is one of my other favorite ships, and since Damon was one of my inspirations for how I'm characterizing Zuko in this story, I felt it fit.**

**I've gotta say, I'm pretty happy that I managed to update this story twice in under one month. Just barely, but still! I'm hoping to be able to update this story more frequently, so fingers crossed!**

**I hope everyone liked this chapter! Make sure to leave a review with your thoughts! :D**


	10. Clemency

What'd I say to her  
>Why'd I say it to her<br>What does she think of me  
>That I'm not what I ought to be<br>That I'm what I try not to be  
>It's got to be somebody else's fault<br>I can't get caught

If what I am is what I am  
>Cause I does what I does<br>Then brother get back cause my breast gonna bust open  
>The rib is the shell and the heart is the yolk<br>And I just made a meal for us both to choke on

—_Every Single Night_, Fiona Apple

* * *

><p>The knife digs into his throat. Blood trickles down his neck and dribbles onto the pillow underneath his head. Everything is fuzzy for a moment, as his brain is still half-asleep, but he hears her voice.<p>

"Please don't." She sounds frantic and hushed. "You don't have to, _please_."

Katara is _pleading_ for him.

Zuko opens his eyes.

The woman standing over him is beautiful; she has long, black hair, dark red lips, and scheming brown eyes. She spits on him and then places more pressure onto the knife.

Zuko swallows and it hurts, but that's when he spies Katara over the mystery woman's shoulder. Her scars her uncovered, like she's not concerned with them at the moment, and her blues eyes are tinged with red. She's upset, and this makes him angry.

Quick as a flash his hand darts up and he circles the woman's wrist with blazing fingers. She shrieks and yanks herself back, slamming up against the bedroom wall.

Zuko is up and out of the bed instantly. He shoves his foot into the woman's stomach and pushes, watching emotionlessly as she gasps and clutches at his boot.

He raises a hand filled with fire. She'll die. She'll die for upsetting the waterbender, she'll die for sneaking into Katara's room, and she'll die for daring to threaten his life. He's about to shove his fist forward, eyes narrowed with concentration, when nails sink into his shoulder and yank at his shirt.

He removes his attention from the mystery woman long enough to notice that Katara is practically clawing at him. She's saying something, but in his haste to defend the both of them he hadn't even heard her.

"—don't!" She shoves against his shoulder, doing everything that she can to move him.

"Back off, Katara," the woman instructs. "For all we know he'll burn you too just for speaking to him."

Zuko is offended by that. He pushes his foot even harder into the woman's stomach. "Who the fuck are you?" he growls furiously.

The woman has the audacity to smirk at him. "Wouldn't you like to know, pretty prince."

Katara, having given up on Zuko's shoulder, steps forward and slaps her palm against Zuko's extended knee, forcing him to drop his leg.

Before he can even blink the woman is across the room with her knife raised. "Come on, Katara, before he grabs you."

The waterbender glances back and forth between Zuko and the woman with indecision.

Before he can put much thought into the action, Zuko takes her elbow into his grip and forces Katara behind him. He has no idea what this crazy, strange woman might do next. "I'm going to ask you again, and this time you _will_ answer my question. Who _the fuck_ are you?"

The woman curls her upper lip at him.

Katara pushes against Zuko's side so that she can see around him, but doesn't attempt to step out in front of him. "Please, June. Calm down. It's not… I can explain."

The woman, June, lowers her knife a few inches and takes a couple of steps forward. Her brown eyes are fixated on the waterbender. "I found him in your _bed_, Katara. Who knows what he might have done to you?"

Zuko's hands curl into fists. "How _dare_ you suggest that I'd—"

"Shut up, pretty prince, before I give you a red smile."

Zuko almost has her; he's moved across the room so quickly that the woman barely had time to react to his inflamed hands, but Katara grabs the back of his shirt and jerks him backward with enough strength to send him flying into a bed post.

"What are you doing here, June?" Katara demands. Zuko notices that she's standing in front of him now, although he's not sure if she's trying to protect him or the other woman _from_ him.

June presses her lips together until they form a thin line. "I'm here to bust you out of this prison, Katara."

Loud, boisterous knocking causes everyone to freeze.

"Prince Zuko!" comes the muffled voice of a guard. "Is everything all right in there? Do you need our assistance?"

Zuko takes a step towards the door but then hesitates. It would be too easy to throw June out into the hallway and have the Royal Guards take care of her, but at the same time, it could potentially get Katara in trouble. And for some reason, he doesn't want that.

He walks over to the door and pulls it open, making sure to angle his body so that the guards can't peer around him. "Nothing is wrong," he snaps out gruffly. "No more disturbances." And then he slams the door right in the head guard's confused face.

He leans his back against the door and scowls at June. "Now," he begins lowly, "give me one good reason why I should continue to spare your life?"

Before June can open her mouth, the waterbender steps forward. "She's the bounty hunter that I worked for; she's the friend that I came her for."

This takes Zuko by surprise, although in retrospect he should have suspected it. He narrows his eyes at the bounty hunter. "And you came here in honor of your friend?"

June's eyes narrow back at him. "No one deserves to end up like this." She wraps a protective hand around Katara's elbow.

Zuko casually shrugs one shoulder. "Oh, I don't know, I think the waterbender and I have, if anything, become friends." He's being sarcastic, and Katara rolls her eyes, although Zuko catches the way her whole posture stiffens at his words.

Zuko jerks his head toward the door. "Come on. If you surrender quietly, then I'll personally make sure that your execution is as quick and painless as possible."

"No!" Katara cries out, lunging forward in front of June. "Take one step toward her and I'll—I'll—"

"You'll what?" Zuko tilts his head to the side. "Throw ice picks at me? Katara, this woman snuck into my home and put a knife at my throat. She threatened to kill me. I cannot have that."

"You're a hypocrite," Katara accuses. Her still visible blue eyes are shinier than normal. "I stole your knife from your boot that one time, remember? I threatened you then, and you didn't punish me. I knocked you out with a vase!"

June quirks an eyebrow at this.

"That was different," Zuko insists.

Katara shakes her head. "Not really."

Seconds later Zuko is fuming. He hates being cornered like this. "Well, she can't just stay here, Katara. I have to do something about her." He turns his attention onto June. "How did you get in here, anyway?"

June gives Katara a significant look.

And suddenly his stomach drops to his feet. It had never occurred to him that the waterbender might have helped her get inside.

June smirks. "I climbed over the palace gates, scaled the wall, and then climbed in through the window." She inspects her nails. "You should probably consider improving your palace security."

"I have an idea," Katara states, gaining June and Zuko's gazes. "We had a deal."

But Zuko doesn't remember making any deal. "No, we didn't."

Katara looks like she would like nothing more than to punch him in the face. "Yes, we did. You said that if I helped you find your sister and inspect the bodies—"

"Bodies?"

Katara looks at June out of the corner of her eye. "I'll explain later. Anyway, you said that if I helped you, then you'd release Toph from the Project. That was our deal. June can't stay here, but maybe she could sneak back out with Toph? As long as she promises not to come back."

June instantly opens up her mouth to protest, but Zuko cuts her off. "I remember agreeing about Toph…" He eyes June suspiciously. "I don't trust her."

The bounty hunter rolls her eyes. "Good. You shouldn't."

"You'd probably make another assassination attempt."

"You're damn right I would."

"June." Katara's voice is soft, and the older woman turns to the waterbender with worry and affection in her eyes.

Zuko realizes that this is sort of a pseudo-reunion between the two of them. And he's interrupting.

"Please consider this," Katara continues, looking back and forth between Zuko and June before settling her unwavering gaze onto the prince. "That way, our deal is upheld and taken care of, and June would disappear. And I'd stay here, as agreed upon."

"_Katara_," June hisses furiously. "Don't be an idiot!"

"I'm _not_!" Katara snips back, her voice breaking a little bit. "I'm trying to keep everyone alive." For a brief moment, the waterbender looks so exhausted that Zuko thinks that she might collapse back into her bed. She probably wants to.

He almost feels…bad for her. "Okay," he says. "It's a plan."

Katara's face relaxes with relief, but June looks less then pleased.

"However," Zuko nods in June's direction, "if I ever see you again, then I will kill you on site. No exceptions."

Katara's expression crumbles a little, and Zuko understands that this day is the last time that they will spend together. A small part of him feels a little sad on their behalf.

He reaches forward and snags Katara's wrist. "Come on, let's go tell that annoying earthbender what's going on."

Katara attempts to tug her wrist out of his grip, but there's not a lot of effort behind the action. "You don't need me for that."

"I know that I don't. But I'm definitely not leaving you in this room alone with _her_."

* * *

><p>The guards give both Katara and Zuko funny looks when they leave the room.<p>

Zuko straightens his shoulders and sets out in a quick-paced strut toward the volunteer's dining hall. Most of them should be eating their breakfast by now.

Katara follows him slowly, dragging her feet. Occasionally Zuko will glance at her over his shoulder. She's arranged her hair so that it covers the injured side of her face again, but the part of her face that is still visible appears miserable. She looks like she would like to curl up into a ball and cry.

"Lighten up," he finally mutters to her. "At least I'm not having your friend executed. I should be doing that. But I'm not."

"Shut up, Zuko," she snarls, causing him to jerk his head back in surprise. Her misery has quickly dissolved into anger. "You will never understand. She's—she was my best friend, my _only_ friend, for a long, long time." She swipes a finger under her eye. "And now, after tonight, I'll never see her again thanks to _you_."

Zuko looks away from her. "At least she'll be alive. You're so ungrateful," he says coldly. He takes a chance and briefly looks back at her. Katara's upper lip has curled at the edge, but she remains silent. Zuko realizes after a beat that she probably won't speak to him again until it's necessary.

He resists the urge to groan in frustration.

They finally reach the dining hall and Zuko shoves open the door with purpose.

The majority of the volunteers look up at him with vague surprise. It occurs to Zuko that they're not used to him being in their midst.

He's not doing a very good job at running Project Kongzhi. Granted, he's been a little _distracted_, but as the future Fire Lord he should get used to multitasking.

He wonders if his father even cares enough to notice how irresponsible he's been toward the Project as of late.

Someone brushes past his shoulder, and Zuko watches as Katara walks the length of the table before sitting down next to Toph at the other end of the room.

Zuko knows that he has to let them speak in private. They'll have to figure out a good excuse at getting Toph to Katara's room later that evening, and Zuko's also pretty sure that Katara is trying to ease any fears that Toph might have about escaping.

Although, considering Toph's character, Zuko doesn't think the blind earthbender is afraid of much.

He paces around the room leisurely, occasionally popping in on a conversation. All of the volunteers are earthbenders, with the exception of Katara.

Katara.

He still hasn't told her about her upcoming Interviews yet. Dread knits in his stomach. Telling her is one of the last things he wants to do. She'll hate him even more than she does now.

Twenty minutes zoom by, and finally Katara is by his side again, her head ducked low and a serious expression on her face.

"Is everything taken care of?" Zuko asks quietly. The waterbender gives him an imperceptible nod.

They leave the dining room and Zuko leads the way back down the hallway.

"Toph is going to take her dinner in my room tonight," Katara explains underneath her breath so that no passerby can hear. "And then June will take it from there."

Zuko doesn't answer, and soon Katara notices that they're not heading toward the direction of her room.

"Where are you taking me?" she asks, voice laced with suspicion.

"My room," Zuko answers with a shrug. "I don't think it's a good idea for you to be alone with that bounty hunter right now."

Katara's slim fingers wrap around his elbow and pull him back so that he's standing next to her. Her breathing is harsh, but the determined expression on her face is one of the fiercest things that he's ever seen.

"You don't have to be such a cruel person."

Her words resonate inside of him, although he wishes that they didn't.

"Yes," he says firmly. He tugs his elbow out of her grasp. "I do."

* * *

><p>She won't look at him.<p>

She won't speak to him.

She sits at his desk and stares at her hands, and all Zuko can think about is how his letter to Uncle is still sitting, folded up, on the corner of his desk. He still hasn't made the decision as to whether or not he'll send it.

Zuko can't help but think about what Uncle would do in this situation.

The prince immediately knows the answer. _Uncle would have let her spend the rest of the day with her friend. _

Even hundreds of miles away in the Earth Kingdom, Uncle Iroh still manages to have a long lasting impression on his nephew.

Sighing, Zuko gets up from where he's sitting on the edge of his bed, opens his bedroom door, and calls for a couple of guards to accompany Katara back to her room for the rest of the day.

As she glides past him and into the hallway, her face is bright.

Zuko never thought that a smile could affect him like that.

* * *

><p>He takes his tea from the servant, and the guard, the head of security sitting across from him, is staring at him as if he's gone mad.<p>

But the guard wouldn't dare question him.

"So, you understand what I'm telling you to do?"

The guard nods curtly. "Yes, Prince Zuko."

Zuko sips from his teacup and lets the scalding liquid slip down the back of his throat.

* * *

><p>He watches the sun set from his balcony. His mind is running a mile a minute, and he finds that he can't concentrate on any one thing. He's too antsy.<p>

He's wondering if he made the right decision. He's wondering if it makes him a traitor.

He waits until long after the sun dips down below the horizon before he walks out of his balcony and out into the hallway.

He makes the long trek to Katara's room with a queasy feeling rolling about in his stomach.

He doesn't knock when he reaches her door; he doesn't hesitate at all when he pulls on the doorknob.

Her window is open, and for a brief, horrifying moment Zuko thinks that his fears are confirmed, that Katara has escaped with June and the earthbender.

But then he notices her lean form, shrouded in darkness, perched on her windowsill, watching the night sky and letting the evening wind ruffle her hair.

Zuko doesn't speak a word. He closes the door behind him and leans against it, heart pounding.

"You did something, didn't you?" There is only a sliver of accusation in her voice.

"Yeah," he admits quietly. "I did."

She turns her head away from the sprawling view of the palace gates and stares at him in disbelief. "Why?"

He swallows thickly. "I just figured…that it was the honorable thing to do."

Tears brim in her blue eyes. She's stopped trying to constantly cover her scars in his presence. "I knew, I knew when I didn't see anyone posted underneath my window that you had done something."

Zuko nods. "I set up an escort for them. If your bounty hunter friend complies, then she and that annoying earthbender should be well out of the city by now."

Katara searches him with her blue, blue eyes for a long moment before dipping her head. Her long hair obscures her face a little bit, so he can't quite read her expression. She doesn't say thank you, and even though Zuko knows that what he did should warrant one, he still thinks that maybe he doesn't _deserve _one.

He clenches his fists and pushes his weight off of the door. "I'll leave you be, now. Tomorrow—"

"We start my Interviews?" she says sourly.

He blinks stupidly in surprise. "How did you—"

Katara rolls her eyes at him. "I'm not an idiot. I'm almost eighteen. I realize that that's what comes next in this…Project of yours." She lowers her eyes and rubs her palms over her knees. "It might actually be nice to get it over with."

Zuko isn't sure if he's ever heard her sound so defeated.

He shakes his head. "No. Tomorrow we're going to have another reading lesson. I forgot that I was still trying to teach you."

Katara's contempt is replaced with anxiety, and Zuko nearly smiles.

He starts to let himself out. "Thank you," he says, not looking at her.

"For what? I didn't do anything." He can hear the frown in her voice.

"For not being dishonorable and leaving when you had the opportunity to."

Katara sighs. "I would never put my friends at risk like that. Besides, you and I had a deal. I always uphold my side of bargains. I hope I can one day say the same for you."

Zuko chuckles darkly at that before leaving her room.

* * *

><p>He takes his time making his way back to his bedroom. He walks at a laid-back pace, occasionally humming to himself. He hasn't been in such a good mood in quite some time.<p>

Not since…

Not for quite some time.

A sly voice in the back of his head whispers that by calling off the guards he insulted himself and his father. A true Fire Lord-to-be wouldn't have allowed that bounty hunter to live. He would have taken her out of the picture for being so impudent.

Zuko shakes his hair out of his eyes and rubs at his temples. He'll think about that another time.

When he gets to his room he spots a familiar figure standing outside of his door.

"Mai?" he calls out uncertainly.

She turns around to face him and he stops abruptly.

Mai is swaying on her feet and her long hair is tangled and rumpled.

"Are you okay?" he asks, taking a cautious step forward. "You had too much to drink, didn't you? That's not like you, Mai."

She shakes her head. "Zuko," she gurgles. She coughs, and thick, ink colored fluid trickles out of her mouth and spots the front of her dress.

Her amber eyes roll into the back of her head and she collapses onto the floor.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

**Okay so I hate this chapter. It's definitely a filler, and I think that's one of the reasons why I had such a difficult time starting this chapter to begin with. It's because I knew that this was going to be pretty lousy compared to what's coming up next.**

**So, apologies.**

**That being said, what's coming up next **_**should**_** be good. We're finally getting down to the nitty-gritty, so I'm excited.**

**Thank you all so much for continuing to read and support this story! I know that updates don't come as often as we all would like, but thanks once again for keeping up with it and reviewing anyway!**

**Leave me your thoughts. :)**


	11. Admission

Well some nights, I wish that this all would end  
>'Cause I could use some friends for a change<br>And some nights, I'm scared you'll forget me again  
>Some nights, I always win, I always win<p>

But I still wake up, I still see your ghost  
>Oh Lord, I'm still not sure what I stand for<br>What do I stand for? Oh what do I stand for? Most nights, I don't know

—"Some Nights" by fun.

* * *

><p>Zuko is a good friend.<p>

Or, at least, he tries to be.

Not that he has many friends.

Mai has been kept in the palace for the past couple of days in her own private room. The Royal Physician told Zuko that it was poison, and that if Zuko had not found her when he did then she probably would have died.

The good thing is that Mai is not dead, and that as of last night she is awake and coherent.

Zuko walks into her room this morning, followed by a servant carrying a tray of tea.

Mai is sitting up in her bed and leaning against a couple of massive pillows, looking prim and irritated beyond all belief. "How wonderful," she drawls when Zuko walks through the door. "Tea time with a Prince."

Zuko pulls a chair up next to Mai's bed and instructs the servant girl to place the tea tray on the bedside table. Then he waves the girl away.

"How are you doing?" he asks his friend politely.

She fixes a withering look on him. "Well, I was poisoned. How do you think I'm doing?"

Zuko smiles and pours tea into their teacups. "You're right. That was a terrible question."

Mai is inspects her perfect fingernails for a moment before glancing over at Zuko. "I know what you're going to ask me," her voice is lower than usual, less sure.

Zuko stiffens and then slowly takes a sip of tea, careful not to make eye contact. "Oh?"

Mai sighs. "I don't know who poisoned me. I don't remember anything from the other night. So there's no use drilling me about it."

Zuko offers the second teacup to Mai. She takes it, wrapping her long, pale fingers around it, as if trying to absorb the heat. Zuko notices how drawn she looks, the dark shadows underneath her eyes, and the way her hair isn't quite in place. His friend is on the edge.

"You know it was her," he says firmly. "You know it was Azula."

Mai flashes her amber eyes onto him; they're alight with anger. "No, she didn't'," she states sharply. She stares at him for a long moment before continuing. "I know that you and your sister are on the outs at this time, but Azula has been my friend since we were children—"

"Mai, I know that you're not that stupid." Zuko leans forward and laces his fingers. "Stop trying to protect her. You know as well as I how fantastic she is at stabbing people in the back."

"I'm not trying to protect her." Mai looks away, black hair coming out of her up do and falling into her eyes. She doesn't bother trying to brush it away. "She didn't poison me." But her voice isn't strong. It wavers.

"She did." Zuko tries to make himself sound as calm as possible for the sake of his friend and nothing more. "She poisoned you and then sent you into the palace as a message."

"At what message would she be trying to send?" Mai sounds a little snide this time, which Zuko finds a relief.

His mouth turns downwards into a deep frown. "She's trying to say that anyone is fair game."

* * *

><p>He's supposed to have lunch with Ozai. He's <em>supposed<em> to, but he doesn't.

Instead he walks into the kitchens and grabs a bowl of fruit. In all honestly, he's not all that hungry. But he can think of someone who probably is.

One of the kitchen serving girls looks at him funny as he starts toward the exit door. He pauses, raising an eyebrow at her. She flushes bright red and quickly goes back to her work.

Zuko quickly racks his brain, wondering if he's slept with her before, and if that's why she's looking at him in that way. But he can't remember her face. Zuko has always been good with faces.

The head chef clears her throat and bows her head toward him respectfully. "Excuse her impertinence, Prince Zuko. She is quite new."

Zuko nods and briskly sweeps himself from the kitchens. On his way out he realizes why she might have been looking at him strangely. Zuko has always had a reputation for messing around with cute servant girls.

This kitchen serving girl is new and relatively attractive, and yet Zuko hadn't even considering making a move on her.

Interesting.

* * *

><p>He walks right into the waterbender's room, thinking that since he's brought fruit that Katara will probably forgive him for not knocking.<p>

His assumption proves to be correct.

Katara immediately stands up from her makeshift desk and practically rips the fruit bowl out of his hands. Zuko smiles at her enthusiasm.

She climbs up onto her bed and quickly pops a couple of grapes into her mouth, sighing happily as she chews and then swallows. Her hair is down this afternoon, so Zuko cannot see her scars. He's only a little disappointed.

After a few minutes of silence, Katara sets the bowl off to the side and looks at Zuko with one inquisitive blue eye. "So, no Interviews today, huh?"

Zuko shakes his head. "Not for you. But I have to go and oversee one in a couple of hours."

Katara actually looks a little curious. "Oh? How do those things go, anyway?"

Zuko shrugs. He understands the gist of them, although he's never actually sat in on one before. He moves over to Katara's desk and surveys the parchments scattered on top of it. Clearly she's been attempting at working on her writing. Unfortunately, most of her work is either a bit off or dead wrong.

"You've been working on your vocabulary." He glances over his shoulder at the waterbender. She's folded her hands over her lap and is refusing to look up at him.

"Your characters could still use a lot of work, though."

Her jaw quivers and a blush rises to her cheeks. "Can we not do this anymore? Please? I'm not connecting the words to their meanings. I'm not _understanding_. This is humiliating, so can we please stop?"

Zuko narrows his eyes at her. The waterbender has proven that she is fierce in so many other areas. It is interesting that something as silly as reading and writing has managed to best her.

And then he is struck with an idea.

"I'll be right back," he says.

He returns with an armful of scrolls, scrolls of old folktales, fairytales and legends. He stands in front of the bed and jerks his head, indicating that Katara needs to move.

She crosses her arms stubbornly.

Zuko rolls his eyes. "If you think it would be easier to write while sitting on your bed and not at your desk, then by all means, try it."

Frowning, Katara slowly climbs out of her bed and straddles the chair by her desk, picking up an ink brush as she does so. She looks at the scrolls with both interest and suspicion.

Zuko sits on the edge of the bed and sorts through the scrolls until he finds the one that he wants. He pulls out two copies of the same scroll. He hands one to Katara and keeps one for himself.

Now Katara just looks confused.

Zuko gestures for her to open the scroll. "Try to follow along as I read."

Her eyebrows furrow, but she obeys, spreading out the scroll over her desk and leaning over it, visible eye sweeping over the characters.

Zuko opens up his own copy and starts reading to Katara about the Painted Lady.

He tries to put as much emotion into his voice as he can, and he articulates as best as possible. And soon, much sooner than he expected, Katara starts to make the connection with the words that he's speaking to the words written out on the scroll.

She begins to circle random characters on the page, characters that obviously stand out to her for whatever reason. Occasionally she'll ask him to stop and reread a paragraph, or she'll have him explain to her what one word or what a group of words mean.

Slowly but surely she starts to understand.

An hour passes, and finally Zuko stops reading.

Katara looks up from the desk in aggravation. "Why'd you stop?! Keep going!"

Zuko almost laughs. "I have things that I have to do, waterbender."

She pouts. She literally pouts.

On the way out of her room he instructs one of her guards to go into her room and finish reading the scroll to her. All of the guards look at him funny, but they know not to argue with him.

He makes his way back to his room, preparing himself for the Interview that he is going to have to sit in on.

He doesn't spare any glances for the servant women that pass him in the hallways, even though he's already slept with quite a few of them before. He doesn't even notice them. He doesn't even care.

* * *

><p>This earthbending girl is on the chubby side. She's got a cute face, though, and long, shiny brown hair. She'll probably be matched with someone quickly, but then again it isn't Zuko's opinion that matters, it's technically her potential matches that have the most say.<p>

They're both sitting in a small parlor room that's near the volunteer's dining hall, waiting for the nobleman that she's supposed to meet today to show up. He's late and Zuko isn't pleased.

He sips his tea impatiently. The earthbender, Len, chews on her crackers loudly.

That's when Zuko pulls a small flask out of his pocket and pours a little bit of clear, potent liquid into his teacup. He has a feeling that he'll come to need a drink. Might as well start now.

Len is quirking at eyebrow at him, but Zuko refuses to acknowledge at her.

Finally, the door bangs open and in struts a pompous looking young Fire Nation man, about twenty, with black hair cropped close to his head. He bows to Zuko and then pulls out a chair and slumps down into it. He frowns at the table.

"Who ate all the raspberry tarts?" he demands before pining a suspicious glare onto Len.

The girl meets his gaze easily. "Well, you were late."

Zuko presses his lips together so that he won't laugh. This is going to be fun. He props an elbow up on top of the table and focuses on the blank parchment in front of him. He's supposed to be taking notes and recording how the two people next to him at the table interact. It's his job; he has to find the best match for Len.

However, with every sip from his teacup his head starts to feel more and more fuzzy. He clears his throat and pushes his teacup off to the side. "Right. We all know why the both of you are here."

"Stupid parents," both Len and the nobleman mumble at the same time. Then the both of them look at the other in surprise, before turning their heads away from each other.

"Please," the nobleman snorts. "You can't have it any worse that I do. I was supposed to join the Army, like my older brother. But no. I'm stuck marrying some inbred earthbending girl for the better of—" He then freezes and ducks his head, as if remembering who else is in the room with him.

Zuko frowns. "I'm going to assume that the final part of that sentence was about how completely and utterly _thrilled_ you are to marry some inbred earthbending girl, because you're willing to serve your country in whichever way it might need you?"

The nobleman turns red and Len looks distinctly amused.

Fighting the urge to groan, Zuko glances down at the list of conversation starters that he's supposed to use so that he can determine how much these two have in common.

Instead, he decides to take a swig from his teacup. "All right. What are some of your favorite pastimes?" he asks them both, urging them to start up a conversation.

Len crosses her arms across her chest and sighs. "First, what's your name?"

The nobleman looks taken aback. "What's my name?"

Len rolls her eyes. "Yes. I would like to know your name so that we can at least _attempt _to have a civil conversation."

The nobleman narrows his eyes. "Fine. My name is Zhen."

Len nods. "See, that wasn't so hard, was it?"

"Don't talk to me ask if I am a child!"

"Then stop acting like a child."

"I am _not_ acting like a child."

"Could've fooled me."

Zhen lots out a growl of frustration. "You're infuriating."

"You're tardy."

"That's because I had better things that I was doing!"

"Please. Having this argument with me will probably be the most intellectually stimulating part of your day."

"And what's that supposed to mean?"

"It means that I think you're an idiot."

"What makes you think that you can just speak to me that way?! You'd be _lucky_ to marry someone like me!"

"On the contrary, if I manage to avoid marrying you then I should count all my lucky stars."

"Bitch."

"Bastard."

Having finished his cup of special tea, Zuko has gone to drinking straight from his flask. He quickly busies himself writing down positive comments about this potential couple's progress.

Zuko sets his ink brush down and looks up with a smirk. Both Len and Zhen are leaning across the table angrily, but their faces are only inches apart. Upon realizing this, both of them jump back at the same time, looking flustered. Len smoothes down the nonexistent wrinkles in her dress and Zhen pops a cracker into his mouth.

Neither of them speaks to the other for quite a length of time, but Zuko notices them sneaking glances at the other on occasion. He rolls up his parchment and tucks it into a pocket in his shirt. "Great. I will see you two at the same time tomorrow."

Both open up their mouths to argue, but the prince cuts them off with a raised hand. "Save it, because, frankly, I really don't care."

Zuko is the first one to leave the room.

* * *

><p>He's tipsy. He knows that he's tipsy.<p>

He makes his way back to his room with ease, his pace steady despite the alcohol influence. He's really not drunk-drunk, and he doesn't plan on getting that way. But right now he feels good, and that's what is important.

His sister has been murdering people around the capitol and leaving their bodies for Zuko to find. So what?

His sister has also poisoned his childhood friend and has therefore thoroughly threatened him. So what?

His father is irritated with him for acting like a fool outside of the palace. So what?

The guilt over what he did gnaws at him during the night and he can barely bring himself to think about it. So what?

He finally sees his door. Well, there is one thing that he can do to offset the guiltiness. He marches into his bedroom and heads straight for his desk, immediately finding the letter to his Uncle that he's yet to send. He leans out his door and places the letter into a servant's hand. "Send this to my Uncle as soon as possible."

The servant looks astonished. "Y-Your Uncle, sir?"

"Yes," Zuko says, exasperated. "My Uncle, General Iroh? The one who currently resides in Ba Sing Se?"

The servant nods quickly. "Yes, of course, Prince Zuko. I will have this sent out immediately."

Zuko smiles. "Good. And while you're at it, send for the waterbender."

* * *

><p>He feels hot, but he waits for her at his desk.<p>

When she walks into his room he sits up a little straighter. She glares at him with her visible blue eye when she spots him. "What are you doing? I was almost done with my second scroll!" she exclaims.

Zuko raises one eyebrow. "Second scroll? Quite the fast learner, aren't you?" He leans back in his chair and allows himself to feel a little smug. He managed to teach the annoying, stubborn waterbender how to read. Finally.

"Don't look so proud of yourself." But Katara doesn't look all that upset. Zuko notices how the tips of her fingers are stained black from all of the scribbling she must have done.

Zuko lifts one shoulder casually. "You were illiterate before; now you aren't. I did a good thing."

Katara walks across his room and looks at the door leading out onto his balcony. "Yeah. You did." She opens the door and lets herself out.

The prince stands up to follow her. The sun is setting outside, casting a bright, nearly blinding orange light into his gaze; he lifts one hand to block it.

Katara is leaning against the wall. "How did the Interview go? Are they going to be a good match?"

He thinks of Len and Zhen arguing and he almost smiles. "Possibly. They have to sort through some issues first."

Katara looks our across the palace grounds thoughtfully. "At the very least, perhaps they can be friends."

"Friendship is not what the Project is looking for."

"Right," Katara agrees, bitterness creeping into her voice. "All you're really looking for is tolerance from both sides."

They both know what she's thinking about. She's thinking about her own Interviews, and how she'll have to be matched with someone as well.

Katara slides down the wall until she's sitting and a moment later Zuko joins her. They leave some space between their bodies so that they aren't quite touching.

Soon the sun has almost set, and the moon has drifted to her specified spot in the sky. Both the sun and the moon coincide together in their brief, peaceful way.

Katara lets out a breath and Zuko tilts his head toward her. The wind picks up her unruly hair and whips it around her face.

"I guess I should thank you for what you did," she says.

Zuko's chest tightens. He didn't think that he'd ever hear those words come out of her mouth. "You're welcome."

One corner of Katara's mouth lifts up in a half smirk. The wind has moved her hair away from her face so that she is exposed. Zuko isn't really surprised to find that he likes it better like this.

In fact, the waterbender has stopped catching by surprise. Or perhaps he's just learning to accept everything about her.

Katara turns an eye onto him and suddenly their faces are close. Very close. Too close. They could lean in, they could do something about it. But both of them stay absolutely still.

"I've decided that you're not all bad." Her voice is barely above a whisper, and the sound of it is nearly blown away by the ferocious evening wind.

Something jolts inside Zuko, but before he can speak Katara continues. "Don't get me wrong, you're messed up. But who isn't, really?"

"You're wrong," Zuko says sharply.

But Katara shakes her head. "You let June go. You let Toph go. You taught me to read. You worried over your friend after she was poisoned. You care about your father. There's a part of you that's not bad, Prince Zuko."

She has called him _Prince_ Zuko. She's never done that before.

He can't look at her anymore.

"You're wrong," he states again. "You don't understand. I did a bad thing."

_There's blood on his swords._

Zuko forces himself to keep talking. She, out of anyone, deserves the truth. "My father has always preferred my sister. She was the better bender, the better politician, the better _everything_."

_Dead. Dead. Dead._

Zuko swallows thickly. "I did something that I knew would earn his respect. And I was right. He respects me now. He prefers me now." He sounds crazy. He knows that he sounds crazy.

Katara has scooted a couple of inches away and has turned her body so that she is completely facing him. Zuko can understand why she wouldn't want to put her back to him right now.

"What did you do?" Her voice wavers.

"I killed Zhao." His voice isn't inflicted with any emotion. He says "killed" and "Zhao" and puts them together like they're just words, like they don't mean anything.

"So, you see," he continues, forcing his body not to shake, "I might have done a couple of good things. But that doesn't make me good. A good person doesn't take the life of someone else."

"Things aren't always that black and white," Katara says softly.

"No. I murdered him. With my swords. I cut him up into pieces, just because I could. Because a small part of me kind of wanted to. And then I dumped his body in the sewers." He laughs. He _laughs_. "Sorry, Uncle. But I am like them, no matter what you say."

He looks into Katara's eyes. "Well, aren't you disgusted with me now? Aren't you afraid?"

But she doesn't move.

"I've killed someone," Zuko insists. Every part of his body is hot and his head is swimming.

She blinks, eyes wide. "So have I."

It is as if all the blood in his veins has frozen. "Who?"

Katara's eyes shine with unshed tears. "I killed my mother."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

**Oh boy.**

**Don't forget to review! :D**


	12. Heartache

**Just give me time  
>You know your desires and mine<br>Wrap my flesh in ivy and in twine  
>For I must be well<strong>

**Keep the earth below my feet**  
><strong>For all my sweat, my blood runs weak<strong>  
><strong>Let me learn from where I have been<strong>  
><strong>Well keep my eyes to serve, my hands to learn<strong>  
><strong>Keep my eyes to serve, my hands to learn<strong>

—"**Below My Feet" by Mumford & Sons**

* * *

><p>He stares at her, golden eyes wide with disbelief, and she stares right back.<p>

"No," he breathes.

Tears spill out of her eyes and drop down, down her cheeks and onto the balcony floor. And then she lets out a pitiful, mournful noise, and despite his incredulity he cannot push her to speak again.

Her body wracks with powerful sobs and Katara covers her face with her hands.

All Zuko can do is stare.

After a moment he reaches out a hand and places it on her trembling shoulder. It's all she needs. She lets her body pitch to the side and then her head is resting in his lap as she cries.

"She looked like me. I look like her, before I got my scars," Katara wails, fingers curling into the fabric of Zuko's pants. "We had the same eyes, and she used to sing me to sleep and braid my hair. And I killed her. I did."

Zuko trails his fingers through her locks and stares listlessly down at her, seeing her but not really _seeing _her, because his mind is very far away. Something doesn't feel right.

"I know you," he finally says. "There's no way you have the capacity to kill your own mother."

She twists her neck up so that she can look him in the eye. "You don't know _anything_ about me," she snarls, and Zuko's fingers still in her hair.

He doesn't say anything more, only listens to her ragged breathing as it eventually evens out and deepens with sleep. He waits until the sun has completely set, until it is completely dark, before he slowly and gently maneuvers her into his arms and then gets to his feet. She barely stirs.

Usually Zuko is kept awake by his troubled thoughts. Apparently the opposite is true for the waterbender. He remembers Iroh once telling him that dreams can be an escape for some.

He places her on top of his bed and pulls a blanket over her. She pulls the edge of the blanket over her head in her sleep and buries herself deeper into his plush bed. Not wanting to disturb her, Zuko walks to the other side of his bed and perches on the edge of it, too lost in his own thoughts to consider sleeping himself.

He spends the rest of the night watching the door, daring anything or anyone to threaten Katara's temporary peace.

* * *

><p>Zuko eventually drifts off when the early morning rays of the sun start to make their way into his room. He catnaps for a bit, finally waking when there's a rustle of movement beside him. He rolls over to see Katara sitting up in bed with her arms wrapped around her knees. She stares ahead of her, eyebrows furrowed in deep thought.<p>

She's a murderer. She's a murderer, just like him.

The thought doesn't disgust him like it should. In fact, it comforts him. Today, she is a closer to his equal than anyone else.

He slowly sits up beside her, rubbing the back of his neck.

"I know what you want to talk to me about." The waterbender's voice is raw.

"You can tell me later." Zuko turns his body and places his feet onto the floor. His back is to Katara, but he can easily imagine the surprised look on her face that she's probably shooting in his direction.

When he tilts his head to look at her he finds her slack jawed, just as he had suspected.

"It's early," he explains. "Besides, I have things that I have to attend to at this moment."

Oh, that reminded him…

"By the way, your Interviews start this afternoon." He can't meet her eyes. He might say something that he doesn't mean. Or maybe he would mean it.

Katara nods slowly. "Fine." The bitterness in her voice creeps into his bones faster then he would like to admit.

He disappears into his closet and dresses himself before putting on his shoes and making his way to the door. He pauses before closing his fist around the doorknob. Odd, normally the girl he wakes up to is the first one to leave.

"You can stay in here as long as you want," he says, gesturing toward his bathroom.

"Are you sure that's smart?" she questions. "That bathroom is filled with water. I could bend my way out of here."

Zuko snorts and Katara's lips twitch in an almost-smile.

He leaves, closing the door behind him. A burning, crushing curiosity is threatening to engulf him. Katara is going to tell him the back story between her and her mother, and she is going to tell him _tonight_.

* * *

><p>There's a flask in his pocket, but this time he doesn't pour anything into his tea. He sips from his teacup instead and lets the scolding liquid scold its way down his throat. The heat is comforting. The heat is something that he's used to.<p>

Len looks pale today, much paler then she did yesterday. There are bags underneath her eyes and Zuko wonders how much sleep she managed to miss the night before.

The two of them sit in silence as they wait for Zhen.

The nobleman arrives right on time today.

Zhen slides into his chair without a word, and by the way his mouth is pressed into a firm line in seems as if he doesn't plan to speak at all today.

That resolve shatters as soon as he spots the plate full of raspberry tarts. He blinks in surprise, mouth open, before grabbing one.

"You didn't eat them all today," he notes.

Len shrugs one casual shoulder. "You weren't late." This comment earns her a small, discreet smile from Zhen, and the young man happily pops the tart into his mouth.

Zuko glowers into his tea. This is stupid. He doesn't want to be here. His mind is whirling with thoughts that have nothing to do with Zhen and Len and raspberry tarts.

But this is his duty, he reminds himself. He's here because Ozai decided that he was the better man for the job over Azula.

Because he's more capable then Azula. He's more brutal.

He is.

The prince glances down at the conversation starters, glad to have them. "How many children would you like to have?"

"None," Len states immediately. "But I don't really have a choice, do I?" She snarks out the last bit, but doesn't aim it toward anyone in particular.

Zhen is watching her. "I think having a couple would be nice." He quickly continues at Len's raised eyebrow. "I mean, it'd be interesting to see how they turned out."

"So you're morbidly curious." The earthbending volunteer traces her fingertips along the china teacup, but she doesn't take a sip. Her green eyes flick up to the man sitting across from her. "To be honest, I'm more interesting in making the children."

Both Zuko and Zhen stare openly at the young woman with wide, disbelieving eyes. Zhen's cheeks have turned bright red.

"Perhaps we should talk about things that are more appropriate." But Zuko can't keep the clear amusement out of his voice. He likes this girl. She's interesting.

Len raises an eyebrow at him. "Why not?" she challenges. "Sexual chemistry is important for any potential romantic relationship."

"But we don't even like each other," Zhen points out.

"You don't have to like someone to be sexually attracted to them."

"Well, yeah. But it helps."

"This program is essentially a breeding program. Sexual attraction is all you really need."

"You're over thinking this."

"Eat your raspberry tarts."

"No."

Len huffs and crosses her arms under her breasts. "Let me just ask you one question. Would you have sex with me?"

Zhen stares at her, dumbfounded, for a few long moments. His amber eyes start to glaze over, and Zuko can easily guess what he's thinking about.

"Right." Zuko scribbles down a couple of notes onto their progress sheet. "I'm giving the two of you clearance to go out on a chaperoned date. Have fun."

"Your Highness, wait." Zhen looks slightly panicked. "You're going to set me up with this…this _crazy_ girl?"

"My sister is crazy. She isn't crazy." Zuko gives Len a curious once over. "Just aggressive."

Len looks particularly pleased with herself, as if she has reached some personal goal. Zuko wonders if intimidating Zhen during this Interview was her intent all along. He has to commend her on a job well done.

"You're both dismissed," he orders. He doesn't watch them leave. He pulls out his flask and lets it rest on top of the table. He takes in deep breaths, forcing himself to relax.

Fifteen minutes later _she _walks into the room, and his mind goes completely blank.

* * *

><p>Her guards must have gone to his room and taken her back to her own, because it looks as if the royal dressers have given her an impromptu makeover. Her long, brown waves have been pulled back and piled on top of her head and someone has lined her eyes with charcoal.<p>

Zuko hates it. She doesn't look anything like the spirited waterbender that he knows, that he's friends with. Because that's what they are, despite everything.

Friends.

"Stop staring at me," Katara snaps. She won't meet his gaze with hers, and Zuko can only imagine how uncomfortable she's feeling right now.

"Relax," he says quietly. Katara only purses her lips and turns her head away from him.

Something inside of Zuko's chest crumbles a little.

The door at the other end of the room swings open, and in strides a young looking man with light brown hair and kindly coffee-colored eyes.

Zuko hates him instantly.

Out of his peripheral vision he sees Katara sit up a little straighter and fold her hands in her lap. She hasn't touched her tea, nor any of the food sitting on top of the table.

The young man smiles at her as he sits down. "Hello," he greets, brown eyes taking in the waterbender.

Katara shifts a little bit in her seat.

The young nobleman looks at Zuko and bows his head in respect. Zuko merely frowns back at him.

"Katara," Zuko begins, voice low, "this is Ren. His father is a member of the Fire Lord's council."

Katara nods slowly and sniffs, clearly nervous.

"You look lovely this afternoon, Katara," Ren compliments. He actually sounds sincere; there's no trace of mockery in his voice.

However, by the way Katara sinks down in her seat Zuko can tell that she doesn't really believe him.

"Thank you." Her brown cheeks darken in a blush.

Zuko glares down at his now empty teacup. He forces himself to speak. "What are some of your favorite pastimes?" he asks, pulling from his ever present list of conversation starters.

To his utter fury, Ren immediately answers the question. "I quite enjoy reading." His eyes have not left Katara's since he greeted Zuko.

The waterbender reaches up to fiddle with her hair before remembering that it's all pulled back and out of her reach. "I just learned to read, actually."

Ren's expression lights up with interest. "That's wonderful!"

Katara nods. "Prince Zuko taught me himself."

Ren glances at Zuko in surprise. "Really? I would think his Highness would be too busy for things such as teaching—"

Zuko pins Ren with a withering look and the other man quickly changes the subject.

"Well, Katara, do you have any favorite scrolls yet?"

Katara perks up. "I really enjoy reading about the Painted Lady. She's intriguing."

Ren smiles. "She's my favorite as well."

The two strike up a conversation and soon seconds, minutes fly by without Zuko's permission. He doesn't take notes. He doesn't offer up anymore conversation starters. He simply stares at the wall and refuses to look at Katara, refuses to acknowledge her presence.

It hurts and he doesn't understand why.

They're laughing about something and Zuko blinks and swallows. What if Ren is Katara's right match? What if she leaves the palace, marries him, and has his children? These thoughts swallow Zuko whole and the ink brush snaps in his hand.

These thoughts are not just impossible, they are unacceptable.

It hurts and he doesn't understand why.

And then there's a pause in the chatting. Zuko looks up long enough to see Ren steeling himself to ask a question.

"Katara, out of curiosity, how did you get those scars?" He asks earnestly, and Zuko can detect no malice coming from the other man, just genuine inquisitiveness. But Katara's face, which had been happy and satisfied a moment before, suddenly darkens.

Something inside Zuko snaps at seeing Katara go from cheerful to cheerless in such a short amount of time.

It hurts and he doesn't understand why.

Before the waterbender can open her mouth, Zuko rounds on Ren. "What did you just ask her?"

Ren jumps, startled at Zuko's sudden outburst. "I apologize if I stepped out of line, but most scars come with a story. I was wondering if Katara—"

"Get out." Zuko's voice is low, dangerous. His pale fingers curl around the edge of the table. The smell of smoke is suddenly in the air.

Ren stares at him, shocked, and doesn't move.

"Get out," Zuko repeats, ignoring Katara's concerned hand on his arm.

Ren slowly nods and stands up before bowing low. "As you wish, Prince Zuko." He straightens up, lips twitching as he looks at Katara one more time. Then he leaves. Finally.

Silence stretches out between Zuko and Katara for a long moment.

"What is wrong with you?" Katara stands up so quickly that she knocks her chair backwards.

"He asked you about your scars!" Zuko shouts, rising from his seat.

Katara's mouth falls open in incredibility. "_So_? A lot of people ask me about my scars. You've asked me about my scars!"

"Yes, but I _stopped_ asking!"

"Why does that matter?"

"Because you don't like it! You don't like it when people point out that half your face is mangled!"

Katara freezes, blue eyes shiny, and Zuko opens his mouth to barrel forward before suddenly stopping.

It hurts and he doesn't understand why.

He turns around and stalks from the room, trying to ignore the fact that Katara is hot on his heels.

"Why does it matter?!" she shouts at his back furiously. "Why does it matter to _you_?"

It hurts and he doesn't understand why.

He makes his way through the palace corridors, intent on getting to his bedroom as quickly as possible. Katara screams at him the whole time. Servants stop and stare, flabbergasted that he's letting her.

He reaches his bedroom door and yanks it open. Katara doesn't let him slam it in her face; she follows him inside instead.

Her voice sounds far away. "I am a scarred, messed up, runaway waterbender with no life prospects outside of running around with a bounty hunter. You…you're a prince of the Fire Nation. You're a master of your element, you were born to rule, and you're _beautiful_." Her voice breaks. "Why do I matter to _you_?"

It hurts and he doesn't understand why.

When he kisses her, he half expects her to feel cool. But she's doesn't. She feels far from it. Her mouth is burning hot against his; her tongue leaves fire as it traces over his bottom lip. She is an inferno and Zuko thought that he was used to this kind of sweltering heat. He's not. He's far from being used to it. He doesn't ever _want_ to get used to it.

She burns.

* * *

><p>Her head is propped up against one of his pillows. She watches him behind a curtain of messy waves. This is the Katara that he's used to. This is the Katara that he prefers. She's still in her nicer clothes from her earlier Interview, but the upper part of her top is ruffled from Zuko's wandering hands. The charcoal around her eyes is smudged, but Zuko likes it. Tonight, there's something wild about her.<p>

His head feels sleepy and it's as if something heavy is sitting atop his chest. He doesn't mind. He doesn't mind anything.

Katara reaches out and traces a design into Zuko's shoulder. He lets her. It feels nice, comforting.

He's not all that surprised when she starts to speak.

"There was a raid. I'd never seen a raid before, but the older members of the Tribe always talked about how the snow would turn black, and when that happened then you needed to hide. You can't run away in the Water Tribes. There's nowhere to run to. I was ten, and I was with my brother. When the black snow started to fall I ran to go find my mother. By the time I found her in our igloo there were already Fire Nation soldiers everywhere. I thought they were going to eat me, devour me whole. I wasn't young enough to still have thoughts like that.

"I walked into our igloo and found my mother with a soldier. This man…there was something off in his eyes. There was a blood thirst, a desire to harm. Sort of like your sister. My mom told me to run and find my father, the Chief. I left the igloo…but it was like my feet couldn't move. I was too scared to do anything.

"That's when I heard the man start speaking to my mother. He told her that he was looking for the last waterbender, and that if she handed them over then he and the rest of his men would leave us alone. My mother…my mother told him that _she_ was the last waterbender. I knew that I should have revealed myself. You see, rumors had spread that the Fire Nation was looking for benders to help populate their own country. A young, waterbending girl like me would've been taken alive. But someone as old as my mom…"

Katara's voice cracks and the tears start to run down her cheeks.

"She claimed that she was the waterbender, and he killed her, and I didn't do anything to stop him. I didn't tell him the truth, like I should have. I let my mother die for me. I let her die for me and my bending, all because I was too frightened to tell that soldier the truth. I could have saved my mother. I could have kept our family whole. But I didn't."

Zuko shakes his head and scoots a little bit closer to her. "You were a child."

"I was old enough," Katara says haughtily. "In the Water Tribes, we protect out family. And I didn't do that. I didn't do what was right. My mother's blood is on my hands. _Mine_."

"But you didn't kill her, Katara."

Incomprehensible sadness washes over her face. "I might as well have."

She sighs and then continues. "We pushed her out to sea the next day. My father and most of the other men of our Tribe left soon to fight in the war. A few years went by…" She hesitates here, as if skipping over details. Zuko realizes that she's hiding something from him. "I felt guilty and disconnected from my brother and my grandmother. So, when I was twelve, I snuck onto a trading ship from Kyoshi and left."

"And found June."

"She found me, rather."

Zuko frowns and looks at the wall over Katara's shoulder. It figures that she would guilt trip herself into thinking that something that clearly wasn't her fault was her fault.

Meanwhile, he'd murdered someone in cold blood. He wins this particular contest.

But he doesn't say this aloud.

Soon, Katara's body curls along his and the smell of her hair relaxes him until he finds himself in a deep, dreamless sleep.

* * *

><p>He's unceremoniously roused in the middle of the night by someone banging on his door. The first thing he does after waking is to check to make sure that Katara is all right.<p>

She continues to peacefully sleep. He smiles. It must be nice to be such a heavy sleeper.

He gets out of his bed and yanks open the door, lips curving down in a deep, irritated frown.

The guard looks embarrassed and a bit mortified. "My apologies, Prince Zuko, b-but your sister has returned."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

**First off, sorry that this wasn't updated soon. Real life can get super crazy, as I'm sure y'all know.**

**Second off, wasn't really expected the massive response for the last chapter SO THANK YOU to everyone who left their thoughts. I really appreciate it! You guys are awesome.**

**I hope this chapter made some of you happy. ;) Leave me your thoughts!**

***sigh* We're so**_** close**_** to the sexy times. Finally…**


	13. Climax

**She burns like the sun, and I can't look away  
>She'll burn our horizons, make no mistake<strong>

—"**Sunburn" by Muse  
><strong>

* * *

><p>"<em>What<em>?"

Zuko doesn't wait to hear any more from the servant. He shoulders past him and makes his way down the hallway, toward the Fire Lord's bedchambers.

He bursts inside, banging the door against the wall in his aggression.

Ozai rolls off his concubine and she lets out a surprised squeal. Zuko's upper lip curls in disgust.

Ozai glares at him, long hair down and mused, and bites out, "And what does my son wish to say to me at this hour?"

Zuko's hands tighten into fists. "You let _her_ back into the palace?!"

Ozai rolls his eyes and shifts underneath his silken sheets. The concubine sitting next to him tries to smooth down her hair, which seems silly to Zuko. It's not like he hadn't been aware that they were fucking.

"Your sister—"

"Is a murderer."

Ozai raises an eyebrow. "And you are not?"

Zuko quickly looks down at the floor, irritated with himself. His hands have started to shake, he's so furious.

"Azula has come to me and made her amends, so I have accepted her back into my home."

"Father," Zuko begins, forcing himself to speak slowly so that Ozai will understand his point, "she poisoned Mai, her childhood friend. What makes you think that she won't harm someone else? Someone that hasn't done her or this family any wrong?"

Ozai frowns. "Zuko, she is your sister."

"That doesn't matter!" Zuko shouts, briefly losing control. The concubine shrinks back in the bed, as if she's afraid that Zuko will attack.

"She is _blood_—"

"It doesn't matter! You've raised us to make _sure _that it doesn't matter!"

Ozai looks appalled and livid at his son's outburst, but Zuko turns around and leaves the bedroom before anything else can be said.

He slams the door behind him. He's never been that angry and disrespectful toward his father before. Never.

As Zuko walks back to his own bedroom and climbs under his own silken sheets, he realizes why.

Zuko and Ozai are the same height. Zuko and Ozai have the same build. Zuko and Ozai have both mastered fire bending. And Zuko and Ozai both know how to hate.

If Zuko were to face off with his father, he could quite possibly win.

Katara mumbles something in her sleep and sighs, lost in dreamland. Zuko feels something surge inside his chest. Perhaps it's protectiveness, maybe fear.

Zuko is no longer afraid of his father, but there is still a part of him that is afraid of his sister.

* * *

><p>Katara sits perched on the edge of his bed, watching the servants walking in and out of the room like a hawk.<p>

She's still wearing her nice dress from the night before, and the way she's sitting is causing the hem to ride up, showing off her shapely legs.

Zuko catches a few of his guards ogling. They stop ogling as soon as they see his potent glare.

Eventually the last servant bows low to Zuko before leaving the room and shutting the door quietly behind him.

Katara fixes a suspicious gaze onto him. "Why did you have all of my stuff brought to your room?" There's a twinge of curiosity in her voice. Her teeth catch her bottom lip and Zuko finds himself temporarily distracted. Her hair is down, but she's not trying to cover up her scars. Not anymore.

A moment passes and finally Zuko snaps his head up sharply, forcing himself to take in a deep breath. He can't think about having sex with the waterbender right now. He's not even sure where their relationship stands, which is frustrating.

Zuko clears his throat and cuts straight to the chase. "My sister is back."

Katara visibly recoils, fear and panic dawning on her face. "You're joking," she accuses pathetically.

Zuko frowns and shakes his head. "I found out late last night, or early this morning, rather."

"Why didn't you wake me up?"

Zuko leans his back against the wall. Her blue eyes are wide, searching. He doesn't understand. How can she manage to make him feel so small?

"You were sleeping. I figured it'd be best not to wake you."

Katara folds her knees up to her chest, clearly worried. "She doesn't like me, Zuko. Your sister isn't stupid. She knows that I helped you search for her. She'll…she'll find some way to—"

"She's not going to _touch_ you."

He pushes himself off the wall, strides over to the bed and crouches down in front of her. He almost, _almost_ reaches out and touches her cheek. Something forces him to stop. Uncertainty, maybe.

Katara isn't even looking at him. Her eyes are focused on the wall behind Zuko's shoulder. "She's murdered innocent people—"

"I wouldn't exactly call them 'innocent'. They were all enemies of my father."

Katara sends him a withering look. "That doesn't mean much to me." She drums her fingers against her knee before catching his eye. She stares at him for a long, unnerving moment. "What if she finds out about me and you?"

Zuko's heart begins to hammer. "Me and you?"

Katara is quiet. She shifts her body a little bit, uneasy. Zuko forces himself not to move, as if she's a frightened animal and he'll scare her away if he makes any sudden movements.

"What's going on?" she whispers, and Zuko knows that she's not asking about his sister.

He blinks, keeping eye contact with her. He no longer feels just small; he now feels miniscule and he has no idea how this girl managed to render him to this state. He lets out a breath. "I don't know."

Something crosses over her face, and Zuko wonders if she's made some sort of decision. He watches as she steels herself before reaching her hand to his face and trailing her fingertips along his jaw. Then she cups his cheek and leans her face toward his.

The kiss is slow and sweet, but Zuko thinks that it tastes like bitterness. Bitterness, because he's not sure how this can go anywhere but nowhere. Even still, he leans forward, turning aggressive and biting her bottom lip. She squeaks, moving her hand into his hair and forming a fist.

Zuko rolls up onto the balls of his feet and pushes her back into the bed. He's used to taking control of situations like this. He's used to being the predator.

Katara uses her fistful of hair to yank his head back and away from her.

He gasps for air, startled, eyes wide.

She frowns down at him. "Ow."

"Ow?"

The corner of her mouth quirks up a bit. "You bit me."

Zuko runs his hand along her calf, hoping to distract her. But her grip in his hair only tightens. He swallows, watching Katara's eyes flick to his throat.

"Sorry," he mumbles.

And then Katara smirks. She eases up on his hair, leaning forward and tilting her head to the side. She breaths onto the skin of his neck, and the heat coming off of her makes a shudder run down his spine.

She nips at his neck and his hands settle themselves onto her hips.

There's a knocking on the door. "Prince Zuko, Fire Lord Ozai has summoned you to his office."

Zuko breaks away from Katara's grip. He looks up at her and an unspoken agreement passes between the two of them.

He's happy to see that the waterbender looks thoroughly disappointed.

* * *

><p>Zuko struts into his father's office with his head held high. He clenches his jaw and bows respectfully toward the Fire Lord. "You summoned me?"<p>

Ozai's golden eyes are hard with anger. They used to terrify Zuko when he was a child, when he was too young to realize that his eyes were exactly the same.

"Prince Zuko, what you did last night was unacceptable behavior. You will never do it again, do you understand?"

Zuko nods slowly. He knows to pick his battles with his father.

"Good." Ozai folds his hands together and leans back in his chair. "I heard that the waterbender had her first Interview yesterday. How did it go?"

"Fine," Zuko bites out, blood beginning to boil.

Ozai raises a sharp eyebrow. "Just 'fine'? She met with Ren. His father sits on my council. Since Admiral Zhao's…untimely demise, his father is expected to take his place."

Zuko forces himself to stand still. "With all due respect, how does this relate to Katara?"

Ozai freezes and Zuko instantly realizes his mistake.

"It relates because this waterbender is extremely important. You know this, Prince Zuko. The higher family she is placed with, the better."

Zuko nods, hoping for dismissal.

But Ozai continues. "I also heard that her Interview with Ren abruptly ended."

"He acted inappropriately."

"Did he now?"

His father has managed to corner him. Zuko flexes his fingers. He used to never allow himself to be so easily manipulated. He would have to concentrate better.

"Have her interview with him again. See if he behaves more accordingly this time," Ozai orders.

Zuko gives him one quick nod. "Yes, father."

"You're dismissed."

Zuko turns his back to Ozai, his hand on the doorknob.

"Oh, and Zuko?"

Zuko glances at his father over his shoulder. "Yes?"

Ozai's mouth curls into a cruel smirk. "Don't knock up the waterbender."

* * *

><p>When he reenters his room, he finds Katara stationed at his desk, peering over a scroll with an ink pen tucked behind her ear.<p>

"Reading?" he asks, closing the door behind him. He tries not to let his apprehension leak into his voice.

She spares him a glance and a nod, obviously engrossed in her scroll.

Zuko frowns, remembering all the unsent letters to his Uncle tucked into the drawers of his desk. He hopes that she hadn't decided to go snooping.

Although, knowing the waterbender, she had.

Shaking, Zuko disappears into his bathroom and heaves up whatever was in his stomach.

How _stupid_ could he be, to let his father in on his relationship with the waterbender? Because if Ozai mentioned to Azula that Zuko was on a first name basis with Katara then…

Things could go bad very, very quickly.

He bends over his sink and rinses his mouth out, feeling light-headed. He needs a nap. And he probably needs to _not_ have Katara cooped up in his room. He finds that he lets things slip out when she's around, things that he should keep secret.

But he can't send her back to her room. Not with his sister roaming about the palace. The idea makes him jittery, makes him panicky.

This isn't good.

He exits his bathroom to find Katara staring in his direction, eyebrows furrowed in thought.

"Are you all right?" she questions softly.

He shrugs one shoulder. "I have to go chaperone another Interview. You should be safe in here. The servants will bring you your meals."

Katara nods quickly, ink pen hovering over her scroll.

When Zuko leaves his room, he's tempted to lock the door behind him, despite the fact that guards are stationed outside of it twenty-four-seven.

But he doesn't.

* * *

><p>He's not paying attention.<p>

A noblewoman is sitting to his right, listening to a bone-thin earthbender prattle on about his extravagant life in Ba Sing Se. The boy's parents had sent him to the Project when he had turned seventeen.

The haughty, but lovely noblewoman looks particularly uninterested in the earthbender, but she keeps sending Zuko shameless looks over her teacup. He ignores them. He barely even notices them.

He wishes that he was back in his bedroom, spending his afternoon with Katara. He wishes that they could pick up where they had left off this morning.

That thought makes his blood burn and run south.

The noblewoman bites into a raspberry tart, and some of the filling oozes out and smears her onto her bottom lip. She catches Zuko's eye and licks it off suggestively.

He nearly laughs.

The earthbender, however, is not laughing. He's staring at the noblewoman's mouth with piqued interest. Zuko decides to do him a favor.

Zuko starts scribbling onto their Interview sheet. "You have my clearance to attend a chaperoned date together at an establishment of the lady's choosing." He gives the volunteer a genuine smile. "Congratulations."

The earthbender looks ecstatic. The noblewoman looks furious.

Zuko is the first one to stand up and walk out. He needs to get back to his waterbender.

* * *

><p>He knew he should've locked the door behind him.<p>

In one corner of his bedroom a table has been set up and there sits Azula, watching as Katara sips from a cup of tea.

"What's going on?" he barks out, striding over to the table quickly and looming over it.

Azula shoots him an innocent smile. "Just getting to know the waterbender a little bit better. She's such a wonderful addition to the project, Zuzu, don't you agree?"

"An absolute joy," Zuko laces his voice with malice and his sister easily picks up on his threat.

Azula laughs and pats Katara's hand. "My brother has such a flare for dramatics. I've always said that he would make a tremendous actor."

Katara smiles back at her politely, but Zuko catches the sparks in her blue eye. She's covered up the scarred side of her face with her hair again.

Azula stirs her tea with a spoon and crosses her legs and peers at Katara, eyes catlike. "I have to admit, I find it interesting that you've taken temporary residency in my brother's room. Or is it that he's taken temporary residency between your legs?"

Tea sloshes over Katara's cup, though she hadn't even touched it.

"Azula," Zuko snarls, "get out."

His sister smirks at the both of them. "Fine. I was just leaving, anyway." She gets up and saunters out of the room and a moment later a couple of servants file in, grab the tea supplies and table, and file out.

As soon as the door closes Zuko whirls on Katara. "Did she hurt you?"

The waterbender is fuming. "No."

Zuko exhales in relief. "What did she want?"

Katara is glaring down at the floor. "To talk." She looks up at him and pins him in place with her stare. "It was stupid for you to move all of my things into this room. Now the entire palace, including your father and sister, knows about…knows about…" She makes a gesture between the two of them, finishing her sentence.

Zuko crosses his arms over his chest. "What was I supposed to do? Let you stay in your room so that she can sneak into it and—"

"I don't think she's going to hurt me, Zuko," she interrupts softly.

Katara doesn't understand. She doesn't understand that Azula wouldn't hurt her because she wanted to hurt _her_. She would hurt her to hurt him.

But he cannot bring himself to say this aloud.

"Have you eaten yet?" he asks, changing the subject.

Katara quirks an eyebrow. "I just had tea."

"Right."

Something crosses over her face and then she's slowly moving in his direction.

He feels his heart rate pick up, feels his body start to tremble. Katara slides her hand up his forearm, past his elbow, and lets it rest on his shoulder. He knows exactly what she wants by her gaze, and he wants the same thing. He does. His mind and body are screaming for it.

But…he can't.

He takes a small step away from her, suddenly too much of a coward to look her in the eye.

Out of his peripheral vision he sees her warm hand linger in midair, and then sees it falls down to her side.

An apology is at the tip of his tongue, but he swallows it back. He's not sure what he should feel sorry for, he just knows that his chest is aching. He flicks his gaze up toward her, sees her staring at him in disappointment.

"I don't…" he trails off, already uncertain with his words. This has never happened to him before. Never. "This just feels different then what I'm used to."

Katara says nothing, only turns around and makes her way back to his desk, back to her scroll.

She does not speak to him for the rest of the night.

* * *

><p>A week passes in the same manner. At night she curls up on the other side of the bed, refusing to touch him. This shouldn't bother Zuko as much as it does; he's never been one for cuddling.<p>

During the day she talks to him as if nothing is wrong, but he can tell that she is not happy. He can tell that she feels like a bird cooped up in a cage. He hates himself for putting her in this position.

One morning he gets the notice from a servant. He clears his throat and faces the waterbender, who's just now waking up.

"You have your second Interview with Ren this afternoon," he says, voice hard. "I'll be chaperoning it."

Her entire face darkens and she narrows her eyes at him. "I still have to sit through Interviews? I thought—"

"My father demands it," Zuko says, cutting her off.

Katara scoffs at him. "Well, I'm glad I mean so much to you."

They go back to not speaking.

A few hours later Zuko finds himself sitting between Katara and Ren once more.

Somewhere in his emotional spectrum he feels angry, but right now he feels more listless than anything else.

Katara's hair is piled on top of her head again and she is beautiful.

She's always been beautiful. Why had he never noticed before?

She and Ren are talking about nothing in particular. Katara seems unenthusiastic, while Ren seems desperate to keep her attention on him at all times. Zuko thinks that he's pathetic.

Eventually the conversation lapses into silence.

Ren drums his fingers against the table. "Prince Zuko, I wish to ask a question that you might deem inappropriate."

Zuko stiffens. "Is it about her scars?"

Ren quickly shakes his head. "No, sir. It is not."

Zuko spends a moment frowning, considering. "Go ahead."

Katara's blue eyes go wide and she gives him an alarmed look.

Ren casts her a smile that's supposed to be reassuring. "Katara, I wouldn't be asking you this if it wasn't important to me, but, I was wondering… How many men, if any, have you been with in your lifetime?"

Katara looks extremely uncomfortable and squirms a bit in her chair. She looks at Zuko again, as if expecting him to shout at Ren like he did the last time.

But Zuko doesn't. Instead, he leans back in his chair and looks at her expectably. "Well, answer the question."

Her cheeks flush a deep red. "Two," she grumbles, irritated.

Ren's brown eyes widen for a moment before he schools his expression. "Women in the Fire Nation are encouraged to wait for their husbands until performing the act of love."

Zuko snorts. _No one_ waited here, especially members of nobility. Scandal was everywhere amongst them, if only you knew where to look.

"Then it's a good thing that Katara isn't from the Fire Nation, isn't it?" Zuko points out calmly, tracing a pattern into the table cloth nonchalantly.

Katara's mouth curls into a small smile, and she stares down into her teacup, pleased.

"R-Right, of course," Ren says, stumbling over his own words. "Absolutely."

Zuko glances at the clock hanging on the wall. "Our time is up. Nobleman Ren, I will contact you if and when another Interview is scheduled. You are dismissed."

Ren nods quickly, stands up, bows to Zuko and tilts his head toward Katara before leaving.

Katara and Zuko make their way back to the bedroom in utter silence.

* * *

><p>Katara doesn't change out of her dress. She lingers in it, making his mouth water with want whenever he looks at her.<p>

She finally breaks their silence. "I don't want to go to anymore Interviews," she states. "And you don't want me to, either."

Zuko sighs. "Katara—"

"Why does it matter? You're a Prince, you have power!"

"And if I want to keep it then we have to abide by the rules."

Katara presses her mouth into a thin line before speaking. "I know that you think that you're your father, but you aren't."

She steps up to him, but doesn't touch him. She looks him right in the eye, but he feels as if she's looking even deeper. She knows him. He knows that she knows him.

"Stop being afraid," she instructs, voice just above a whisper.

"I'm not afraid," he says stubbornly.

For a moment he thinks that she's going to laugh at him. She doesn't. "Yes, you are." She turns away from him, reaches up and tugs her hair out of its topknot and lets it cascade down her shoulders.

Zuko's resolve breaks.

He's on her in an instant, one hand gripping her hip and the other tangling itself in her hair. He kisses her and she kisses back, just as insistent and passionate as he is. She moans and slips her tongue past his lips.

Her dress comes off easily enough. Zuko decides that it looks better crumpled up on his bedroom floor then it ever did hugging her frame.

Soon his shirt joins her dress, but Katara is impatient. She pulls at a knot and a moment later the cloth that binds her breasts begins to unravel, revealing dark nipples contrasting against brown skin.

Zuko moves to pick her up but she skirts out of his grip, scrambling up onto the bed and giggling. Zuko smiles, his hair falling into his eyes. He can't even remember if he's ever heard her make that sound before.

He follows her onto the bed and falls down on top of her, running his lips along her neck, licking her pulse. Her fingers find their way into his hair and she arcs her back into him, pressing her warm breasts into his chest.

Seeking friction, Zuko grinds his hips against hers and Katara gasps. She flicks her blue gaze to his, eyes half lidded with lust.

Zuko's moves his mouth down to one of her breasts and sucks a nipple into his mouth, working it with his tongue until it hardens.

The small, greedy noises that she's making become continuous, like a song.

Zuko spends some time caressing and kissing her breasts, all the while rocking his body against hers in order to help alleviate some of his own aches. He finally pulls away from her breasts and Katara whimpers as the cool hair hits her upper body.

But he's far from being done with her. He kisses his way down to her stomach, stopping to swirl a tongue around her navel before continuing even further south. When he reaches her underwear he hooks his fingers under the hem and pulls them down without asking for her permission.

The smell of her arousal hits him and his eyes nearly roll back into his head. Soft, curly brown hair covers the place between her legs. Zuko palms her thighs and spreads them, not bothering to take his time or be gentle. That's not what either of them wants.

He ducks his head and swipes his tongue across her core. Her whole body tenses and then she begins to buck her hips against his mouth, trying to get as close to him as she possibly can. With one arm he reaches up and curves his hand along her stomach, pressing her down into the bed. With the other hand he easily slips a finger inside of her; her body is slick and ready for him. He brushes his tongue along her nub, moving it and his finger into a tempo that has her hands forming a tight grip in his hair.

When she comes for him the first time she goes rigid, as if he has shot her with a bolt of lightning. She doesn't cry out his name. Not yet. But she will. She digs her fingernails into his skull, mouth open wide in a silent scream.

Zuko places soft kisses to the inside of her thighs as she goes into her aftershocks. Then he pulls away, sliding his pants down and over his hips before tossing them over his shoulder to join his shirt and her dress.

He moves on top of her again, settling himself between her legs. Amazingly enough, Katara is already relatively alert. She crosses her ankles over his back and stares up into his face, challenging him.

He smirks and thrusts inside of her in a deep motion.

Katara gasps, throwing her head back and stretching out her neck.

Zuko moves inside of her, basking in the way she feels wrapped around him, and somewhere in the back of his mind he wonders why it feels so different here and now than it did with any of the others.

After seconds or minutes or hours, she is pushing against his shoulder and Zuko complies with her wishes, allowing her to flip him onto his back. She straddles him, hands coming to rest upon his chest. The penetration is deeper now, and Katara moans loudly as she works her body above him.

The light from the setting sun comes shining in through the window, illuminating her whole body. Katara has other scars, some small and inconspicuous and some large and predominant. She is perfect. Perfect.

When she comes for him the second time her fingernails curl into his chest and Katara breaks her own rhythm as she begins to clamp down onto him. His name comes cascading out of her mouth and she repeats it continuously, like mantra.

Zuko feels as if his own orgasm is starting from the base of his spine. Pleasure shoots through his core and he clutches at her hips as he bucks up against her once, twice, a few more times. It is as if Katara's body is swallowing his into her own.

Briefly, everything is clear. He thinks he might love this girl. He thinks maybe that's why this time felt different.

* * *

><p>Zuko wakes up a few hours later to a face full of Katara's hair.<p>

The sun has set, plunging the room into total darkness. Zuko snaps his fingers, lighting candles stationed around the room. The waterbender wiggles next to him, stirring as she awakens.

She peers at him through her tresses before giving him a lazy, satisfied smile. He returns it, and she props herself up onto her elbow so that she can kiss his forehead.

"On second thought, I'm glad you moved me into your room," she breathes, hand trailing down his chest.

She'd meant to be playful, but for some reason Zuko feels himself sobering. He sits up and her hand falls back to her side.

"I did it to protect you, you know," he says quietly.

She sits up beside him, her shoulder brushing his. "Have you ever thought that maybe you're the one who needs protecting?"

He gives her an amused look. "I don't think your puddles and ice needles can do much damage."

To his surprise, Katara's face goes serious. "If I shoved it in forcefully enough, an ice needle could pierce a heart."

Zuko frowns. Katara doesn't need ice needles in order to pierce hearts.

There's a soft knock on his door and Katara moans. "Why are people always asking for you?" she says, falling back against her pillow.

"Because I'm a prince," Zuko points out.

He slips out of the bed and pulls on his pants. He opens his door, hair sticking up and with a bare chest.

The guard blinks in astonishment before clearing his throat. "Prince Zuko, Fire Lord Ozai wants you to know that your Uncle is on his way here."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

***wipes forehead* Phew! **

**This chapter was a lot of fun to write, but it required a lot more careful thought then the others. Anyway, I hope everyone liked this! It was nice to finally reach the sexy times. I've been waiting to write that scene for ages.**

**I won't be updating this story until December, since I will be participating during National Novel Writing Month in November and don't want any of my fanfiction stories to distract me. So, Happy Halloween and Happy Thanksgiving! Eat lots of candy and turkey!**


	14. Hunger

**You left my soul bleeding in the dark  
>So you could be king<strong>

—"**Explosions" by Ellie Goudling**

* * *

><p><strong>AN: **

**Guess I couldn't quite wait until December in order to update.**

* * *

><p>It's strange to wake up beside someone for longer than a month.<p>

Zuko is beginning to learn his partner's habits. Katara never likes to wake up early. Never. Unlike some women who only spend a few minutes in the bathroom each morning, Katara will spend the better part of an hour. Most of this hour she spends submerged in Zuko's bathtub, gleefully surrounding herself with her element.

For breakfast, Katara enjoys fresh fruit the most.

Unlike Zuko, Katara does not find tea time all that important.

Katara snubs her nose up at rice wine, openly preferring firewhiskey. Unlike Zuko, Katara does not like to get drunk before the sun sets.

Katara does not like to get overheated, and will often push Zuko away in her sleep. Zuko has started putting lighter sheets on his bed because of this.

Katara likes the fried fish sold in the markets much better than the expertly prepared fish to come out of the palace kitchens.

Katara cries when she becomes frustrated. She also cries when she's been laughing really, really hard.

Zuko absorbs these details and puts them away. He likes knowing things about her. He cares about these things

He _cares_.

* * *

><p>It is nearly impossible for Zuko to get too hot.<p>

His body twists and turns, long streams of fire flying over his head. Sweat drips down between his shoulder blades and his pale skin is hot to the touch under the undeniable heat of the sun.

Azula watches from the sidelines of their practice area, eyebrows drawn forward in thought.

Zuko has no desire to know what it is that his sister is thinking about. He stops his movements, his flames dimming and fluttering out. He turns to one of his servants and holds a hand out. A young man places a towel in his palm and Zuko walks back toward the palace. He runs the cloth over his soaking wet hair.

"Zuzu."

Zuko sighs, stopping in his steps. He runs the towel along his shoulders before stretching his arms up over his neck. "What do you want?" he snaps, irritated that he's being delayed.

Azula shrugs one shoulder casually. "We haven't really spoken much since my return. Didn't you miss me?" Her eyes, golden and exactly like his, gleam.

"Not really." Zuko flips the towel over his shoulder. "Although you sure caused quite the ruckus while you were gone."

Azula steps to her right. Zuko steps to his left. Neither of them will show their back to the other.

Azula sniffs and props her hands over her hips. Her gaze moves over his form, though she doesn't comment on his state. Zuko also notices that she hasn't said a word about his bending. Usually Azula loves to point out where his bending forms and stances are weaker than hers. But not today.

Today they are equals.

"What are you doing this evening, Zuzu?" Azula asks with false sweetness in her voice. "Are you planning on spending it with the waterbender? Or should I call her _your_ waterbender now?"

Zuko doesn't flinch. He turns, careful not to face Azula with his back, and begins to make his way toward the palace once again.

"If she's so much fun," Azula calls after him, "then you should be a good brother and share her!"

Zuko stops, turns his head. "If you touch her then I'll kill you."

Azula snorts and she cocks an eyebrow, incredulous. "You've certainly gone noble, big brother."

Zuko can only answer her by shaking his head. "Not really."

* * *

><p>That evening he tries his hand at making tea. He's never really had to before. There are servants who work in this palace whose only job is to make the finest tea in all the Fire Nation for the royal family.<p>

But today is different. Today Katara is sitting across from him at a small table that Zuko has had set up on his balcony. She's wearing casual, loose fitting pants and her hair is down. Despite the high sun, she keeps yawning and stretching her arms above her head like a content cat.

And for whatever reason Zuko doesn't want anyone, not even servants, to walk in and interrupt this moment.

He's been steeping the tea, or whatever (something with the leaves) for awhile, and Katara brings one of her legs up to her chest and watches his hands lazily.

Soon the tea is finished and he pours them both cups, irrationally proud of himself.

He tastes the tea in its purist form first before deeming it drinkable. He enjoys anything hot, really.

Katara plops three sugar cubes into her cup before bringing it to her lips. She then proceeds to choke and gag.

Zuko frowns, leaning forward in his seat. "What is it?"

Katara blinks down at her tea in horror. "Did you slip poison in this when I wasn't looking?" she says, coughing.

Zuko's lip curls. "No. I'm not my sister."

Katara's brown fingers grip the teacup, as if she's trying to keep certain that it's on the table and not anywhere near her mouth. "Have you ever made tea before?" she asks, lips twitching.

"No."

Katara's lips twitch some more. Zuko knows that she's trying not to smile.

Refusing to admit defeat, he sips from his cup. "I think it tastes fine."

Katara snorts. "Really now?"

"Yep."

"You're a big fat liar."

He laughs outright at this. "I really do like it, I swear." He points at his cup and then gestures to hers. "I'll drink my cup and yours as well, if you won't."

She pushes her intricate, hand-painted teacup across the table so that it is sitting next to his. "Be my guest," she says, the shadow of a smirk on her face.

There's a small commotion down below, and Zuko looks over the railing to see his sister and a few of her servants walking about the gardens.

He'll have to watch his sister even more carefully from now on. She has left Katara in peace these past few weeks. But peace and Azula were never meant to coincide.

He looks back up at her to find Katara watching him with her cool gaze. She doesn't look away when his eye catches her.

"You'll like it when my uncle arrives," Zuko says. "He makes the best tea."

Katara smiles politely, but Zuko can tell that she's not interested in talking about tea. "That's great. I'll have to try some when he gets here."

She looks away from, head turning toward the sun. But she does not look down at the flourishing gardens. She looks out, looks toward the markets and the housing districts, looks toward the country that lies outside of this lavish palace. And beyond all of that Zuko knows that Katara is looking out toward the sea.

The expression on her face is a familiar one to him. She's given it to him a couple of times.

It is an expression of longing.

* * *

><p>Despite the coolness of the early morning, Zuko's bangs are plastered to his slick forehead. He doesn't think that his heart can possibly beat any faster. His silk sheets are sticking to his back, yet he digs his fingers into them regardless.<p>

A lightning bolt is stirring within his body. His hips buck forward helplessly and it takes a great deal of effort not to gasp. He keeps his eyes glued to the ceiling, knowing that if he tilts his head up and looks down then he'll lose it.

He's already about to lose it.

Katara's mouth is wet and hot and her tongue is talented. The lightning bolt comes undone and shoots across Zuko's entire body, leaving him moaning helplessly.

It takes a few moments for his gaze to clear.

Katara's wavy haired head pops out from under the sheets, looking entirely too proud of herself. She swipes discreetly at her bottom lip, but Zuko's mind and body are still too muddled with pleasure for him to feel embarrassed.

Not that he normally feels embarrassed during these situations, really.

He sighs, letting his head fall back against the pillow. His heart is finally starting to slow down. "You're good at that," he sighs in contentment.

Katara scoots out from the end of the bed, arm falling across his chest as she lies down next to him. She looks a little smug and a little awkward at the same time, as if she's not sure how to take that kind of compliment. "Well, you're good at it too. I return favors."

Zuko smiles at that, humming a little in his throat. His fingers glide along her arm and he hears her sigh.

"Don't go back to sleep," he says lowly, playfully.

"Shut up," she mumbles, blue eyes already fluttering closed.

Zuko takes this opportunity to sit up and flip her over onto her back. She yelps, surprised, before craning her neck back in order to see what he's doing.

He taps a bright red scorch mark that's sitting between her shoulder blades. He's been meaning to ask her about it. He _thinks_ that it's in the shape of an eagle. "How did you get this?"

Katara's cheeks flush red. "Oh. That."

"This looks like some kind of gang mark."

"It is," she grumbles.

Zuko runs his fingers over the puckered skin and lifts an eyebrow at her expectantly.

She sighs. "I got in over my head with a rebel group when I was fourteen."

Zuko shakes his head, amused. "Let me guess, the illustrious Freedom Fighters?"

She blinks at him in surprise. "How…? How did you know?"

"The Fighters like to recruit them young. They scour the Earth Kingdom for impressionable youth." He sends her a thoughtful look. "How did you get out?"

Katara bites her bottom lip before looking away from Zuko. "The leader had a crush on me, so he let me leave."

The idea of this bothers Zuko more than it should. A large, loud part of him wants Katara to further explain her relationship with this gang leader, but on the other hand… Katara doesn't really owe him anything. It's not like she's asked about his past trysts.

Although it would probably take him an awkwardly long amount of time to explain all of them.

He strokes his hand from between her shoulder blades to her ribcage, where a long strip of skin is darker than the rest of her body. "How about this one?"

Katara grimaces. "I fell off Jun's shirshu once and landed on a rock."

Zuko winces on her behalf. "Sounds painful."

"It was."

Zuko traces his fingers across her back. He flicks a small, shiny scar near her hip.

Katara answers his unanswered question. "Knife fight with somebody we were searching for. She _really _didn't want to be found."

"Sounds like you've had some adventures with Jun," Zuko observes, pressing his fingers down into her shoulder blades and massaging her muscles. She groans in appreciation.

"Just living life," she says after letting out a whooshing breath. "What's it worth if there's not any excitement?"

And for some reason this makes Zuko frown. He rolls his hands against her shoulders for another minute or two before pulling away and lying back down. He stretches his legs and pops his knuckles, mulling over the pros and cons of staying in bed with the waterbender all day.

Zuko glances at her out of the corner of her eye. Katara's hair has fallen over the scarred side of her face, and she seems to not even notice it. Zuko's lips part; he's going to ask her about her face. He's asked her about all her other scars. But he quickly closes his mouth.

Once again, Katara doesn't owe him anything.

Katara props her head up on her palm and peers down at him, the ends of her brown waves tickling his chest and abdomen. "Can I ask you a serious question?" She looks solemn.

Zuko suddenly feels the itching, burning need to get up. But he stays where he is. "I suppose," he says a little bitingly. It's too early for this kind of seriousness.

"Have you ever done anything that you really, _really_ regret?"

She thinks the answer is obvious. He is a murderer after all. So when Zuko says, "It's more like what I _didn't_ do," her eyebrows furrow in confusion.

Zuko keeps quiet for a moment, deciding to draw this out as long as possible. "When I was thirteen my dad let me sit in on one of his war councils. You don't understand, to be allowed to do that at such a young age was a big deal. I sat there next to my father and listened to everything that was said." Zuko sucks in a long breath and breathes it out as a sigh. "One of the generals suggested sacrificing an entire division of new recruits so that another, more experienced division could attack the Earth Kingdom army from the rear. A well devised plan, I guess."

Katara's blue eyes have done wide with horror.

"I always thought," Zuko continues, "that it was wrong. That it was unfair. I wanted to speak out against my father's general. I wanted to tell him how much I disagreed with him. But I didn't. I didn't say a word. After the meeting was over my father patted me on the shoulder and told me he was proud to have me as a son."

Katara looks ill. "That's…did they actually…?"

"Go through with it?" Zuko finishes for her. "Yes. Hundreds of men died." The way he says it is cold. Too cold. But Zuko has never allowed himself to dwell on this particular event.

"You should've spoken out," Katara says, voice firm but soft in its dismay. "What would your father have done if you had spoken out?"

Zuko slides one shoulder against the bed in an attempted shrug. "He probably would have reprimanded me and wouldn't have allowed me in any more meetings until I was older."

Katara looks as if _she _would like nothing more than to reprimand him. She opens her mouth to presumably do so, but Zuko quickly changes the subject. Something way too close to shame is crawling up his throat and making his face burn.

"What's something you regret? Besides the obvious."

They won't talk about her mother again. He knows that she doesn't want to.

He inspects Katara to come up with something quickly, perhaps another story about her and Jun and bounty hunting.

Instead she slowly slides her hair over her shoulder and tilts her head up. Her scars, long and red and ghastly, catch his eyes. He can't look away. It's like he's seeing them for the first time all over again.

"I was mauled by a bear. A snow bear. That's what we call it in the south. I suppose you could say I provoked it." She stops, words hitching in her throat, and Zuko realizes he is not the only person overwhelmed with shame this morning. "Zuko… I did it on purpose."

He feels his body turn cold. "What?"

"I wanted it to..." She cannot look at him. "And it would've if my brother hadn't been there." She sniffs a couple of times, as if determined not to shed any tears. "Grief is a potent thing."

And this Zuko understands.

Katara ducks her head; her hair falls over her face and she is hiding. But she hasn't left yet. Zuko thinks that that's what matters.

He brushes his hand across her jaw gently before leaning in and pressing kiss against her mouth. He pulls away quickly, leaving Katara looking up at him in confusion.

With a wolfish smirk he lifts the sheets over his head and ducks underneath them before placing kisses across Katara's belly. As he starts to move lower he can hear Katara's breathing quicken In anticipation.

Zuko likes to return favors as well.

* * *

><p>Katara peels the skin off of a tangerine before popping some in her mouth. Her eyes nearly roll into the back of her head and she hums in satisfaction. Zuko watches as she chews slowly, and then swallows.<p>

And then she looks down at her tea in distain. She reluctantly sets her fruit to the side before taking a sip and nearly gagging. She then plops three sugar cubes into the cup.

"That's six sugars, now," Zuko points out in amusement. In his defense, he did_ not_ make this tea.

"You're lucky you don't have to drink it." Katara narrows her eyes at him before taking another sip. She winces, but her grimace is not nearly as pronounced as before.

Zuko drums his fingers against the table. "Well, you don't have to drink it. But then we'd have to stop sharing a bed. In fact, I'd probably have to move you out of my room."

Katara guzzles the rest of her tea, likely scolding her mouth. She sets the cup back down onto the table. "Don't be silly." The corner of her mouth curves and she bends over the table, eyes scanning her newest scroll.

Zuko could easily spend the rest of the afternoon watching her read. Sometimes she'll stick her tongue out between her lips in concentration. Sometimes she'll move her fingertips in circles across her knee without realizing it. Sometimes the ends her hair fall into a half empty tea cup or dip into a fruit tart. She usually never notices until her hair is already tangled and sticky.

And for some reason watching her read is relaxing to Zuko, like writing a letter to Uncle or drinking.

Suddenly a scroll is being shoved against his hand.

"Zuko, what does that character mean?" Her face is completely serious.

Zuko glances down at the character she's pointing out. "It means 'to stab'. Is that another Painted Lady scroll? What, are you hoping to one day become the Painted Lady?"

Katara ignores his last two statements. "How gruesome," she comments, sliding the scroll back in front of her. "I can't imagine what it'd be like to be stabbed. _Really _stabbed, I mean."

"I suspect it would hurt."

Katara snorts, eyes already darting up and down as she reads.

It is then that Zuko realizes that this new phase of his life has become quite comforting.

It is then that Zuko realizes that this could be permanent.

* * *

><p>Zuko lets himself into his father's office, startling the guards posted outside.<p>

Ozai does not look up at him from where he is bent over his desk. "You knocked up the waterbender, didn't you?"

Zuko's rolls his eyes. "No. We're being precautious."

Ozai straightens up in his chair before tossing the parchment that he was reading to his side. "I am not stupid, Prince Zuko." He folds his fingers underneath his chin. "You've come to talk to me about the waterbender. Might I add, I don't understand your fascination with her. She's about as attractive as an ostrich-horse."

This slight toward Katara is like a slight toward Zuko. It slices into his chest. But he brushes his anger aside and forces himself to concentrate on the task at hand. "You've told me multiple times that you want her matched with someone in a high, important family, so that their potential waterbending children will go to the finest schools, have the finest trainers, become the epitome of noble, Fire Nation citizens, yes?"

Ozai nods, golden eyes narrowing in suspicion.

"But by doing so the waterbender would be taken directly out of our control," Zuko continues, growing more and more confident with every word. "She could become corrupted, she could run away, she could escape with any children she might have to the Earth Kingdome or worse, the Water Tribes." Zuko leans forward, keeping eye contact with his father. "She's much cleverer and more determined than the other volunteers, father."

"What exactly are you implying?"

Zuko spreads his hands. "Why not keep her here, in the palace? Better yet, why not keep the waterbender and any of her potential waterbending children in the royal family?"

Ozai's eyes go wide and his mouth snarls with ferocity, but Zuko plunges on.

"What kind of message would having a waterbending prince or princess of the Fire Nation send to the Earth Kingdom or the Water Tribes? It would tell them that anything they can, we can do. A waterbending child that goes beyond Fire Nation nobility, but represented the Fire Nation as a whole…you can't deny that they would be powerful. They would have all the world at their feet."

"And they would be yours." Ozai does not phrase the statement like a question. There is disgust in his voice.

Zuko says nothing.

Ozai watches his son for a long, long time. Finally he leans back in his chair and deeply frowns. "I will think over what you said, Prince Zuko. I will present this matter to my council and they shall decide. But, my son, you do realize what you're doing?"

Zuko blinks, awaiting his answer.

Ozai gives his son a cruel smile. "You're condemning your pet to the life of a mistress. And, as much as they might assure you otherwise, no woman enjoys living in the shadows."

* * *

><p>He waits two weeks. Two weeks.<p>

His father has given him his answer through silence. There are whisperings about, from servants and from nobleman, that soon the waterbender will no longer be a volunteer. She will be officially accepted into the palace household, and under the constant protection of Zuko's guards.

Azula will not be able to touch her without being punished.

Not that she's shown much interest in the waterbender since the day she watched Zuko train.

He walks into his bedroom and does not immediately spot Katara. For a brief moment, he panics. But then he remembers the balcony, and there he finds her watching the sun set. The sunlight bounces off of her, exaggerating her features.

"Hello." She doesn't look at Zuko when she greets him. She slowly turns toward him, eyebrows drawn together. She looks…somber and apprehensive. "I need to talk to you," she says, voice low and shaky.

Zuko watches her for a moment before gulping. "Funny, I need to talk to you too."

Katara wrings her hands. "Oh? Well, you go first."

She's stalling, but Zuko skips right ahead into the conversation, determined to share his news.

"I talked to my father. You've been removed from the Project and will be allowed to stay. You'll be put under the protection of my guards. You and I, we can be…together. We can be together."

"Zuko, what are you saying?" Katara's face has gone ashen. And then she seems to understand. "You're not asking me to _marry_ you, are you?"

Zuko winces, heart beating too fast. "Well, no. A member of the Water Tribes as the Fire Lady… the Fire Nation is hardly ready for that. But you'd be my companion." Companion is the gentlest word that Zuko could come up with.

She watches him for a long time, ocean eyes absorbing his every move, his every expression. Zuko thinks that she might smile, that she might nod with nervousness and then embrace him.

Instead she says, "Are you crazy?"

Time seems to stop and for a moment Zuko cannot think of anything to say. He is not used to shock. "What?"

Katara shakes her head. "Zuko, I can't stay here with you. I don't belong here. I never did. That's what I was going to talk to you about. I was going to ask if…if I could leave."

"You want to leave," Zuko repeats, voice as hard as stone.

Katara sucks in a shuddering breath. "It's just, what would I do if I stayed, Zuko? Have your bastard children?" she snaps, and Zuko catches on to her suddenly growing anger.

"They would be legitimized—"

"Oh, well how wonderful," Katara growls, throwing her hand up in the air. "I can stay here and give you children that would grow up under your watch, that would Fire Nation?"

"That's not—"

"Don't deny it. You would use any waterbending children I'd have as a _weapon_. They would be taught to _hate_ the country that their mother is from! Because that's what you people do here, you spread hate."

"That's not true."

Katara's eyes flash.

"I don't hate you," Zuko admits. It is a straightforward confession, and Zuko wonders why it even feels like a confession at all. It is nothing more than the truth.

All the fight seems to drain out of the waterbender. She slumps against the balcony railing and sighs. "There's nothing for me here if I stay, Zuko." She swivels her gaze onto him, nothing but vulnerable. "But you could always come with me."

Zuko takes in a sharp breath of surprise. That was something that he had never considered. Could never consider. He knows as soon as she says it that it is impossible.

"And give up my throne, my birthright? Leave it to my sister? No. I could never do that."

Katara stands still, and Zuko can feel her sadness.

He feels…rejected. It is not a feeling that Zuko is used to, nor does he enjoy. Therefore he retaliates.

"Perhaps you should just go ahead and go."

"W-What?"

"You should leave now." Zuko does not let his bitterness seep into his voice. "What's the point in you staying, then? If you don't want to be here, then go."

"Zuko—"

"Then go."

She reaches out to touch his elbow, but he jerks it out of his reach. She brushes by him and he follows, shutting the balcony doors behind him. He sits on the edge of his bed and stares at the floor.

He hears her maneuvering around, although he isn't sure why. It's not like she has many possessions. Out of the corner of his eye he sees her lean over his desk.

"Can I take a scroll—"

"No."

"But—"

"Just _go_."

She lingers in the doorway, and Zuko is suddenly flooded with images of all the other girls who have lingered in his doorway. Those images always brought relief, relief that he was finally going to be left alone. But what he's seeing now, the sight of Katara going, brings bile to his mouth.

What was even the point in caring.

She locks her eyes with his and opens her mouth, probably to say goodbye.

Zuko turns his head.

He hears the door softly shut.

* * *

><p>Sometime later, either minutes or hours, Zuko gets to his feet and leaves his room. There is a bottle of rice wine in the kitchens that will be entirely his tonight.<p>

Going into oblivion would be better than staying here.

As he walks down the corridors, someone grabs his arm sharply and whirls him around. He opens his mouth to yell at them before pausing in astonishment. "Ty Lee?"

His childhood friend looks nervous. She tugs on his arm. "Come on."

He runs after her, a horrible feeling churning in the pit of his stomach.

Ty Lee leads him in a parlor, the parlor where Zuko had seen Katara and her scars for the first time.

Azula and the waterbender are at the table, a teapot between them. Katara stands up as soon as Zuko enters the room.

"Azula," Zuko snaps, "what's going on?"

Azula gets to her feet and pushes her chair back. There is a guard stationed at every corner. Zuko recognizes the man to his right as one of the guards that used to stand outside Katara's room. That particular time period seems so long ago.

His sister walks around the table and throws an arm around Katara. "Zuzu, I found your pet trying to leave. I was a little concerned. I'd never seen her walking the halls with such _purpose_ before. So I thought we'd drink some tea and she'd tell me what was going on, what kind of spat you two were having. It's a lover's spat, is it not?" Azula tugs on a lock of hair that had been covering the scarred side of Katara's face. "Lover's spats are usually so silly."

Zuko steps forward cautiously. "Azula—"

His sister huffs. "Why are you so suspicious?"

Zuko swallows, suddenly afraid. "Let her go."

Azula taps her chin in mock thought. "You know, I don't think I will. After all, you were letting her walk away. I guess that means she's fair game, right?"

Faster than Zuko thought was possible, Katara brings the tea from the teapot to her hands, forming a long, sharp dagger. She turns swiftly on her feet and drives it toward the Fire Princess' face, skimming the icy blade over her neck.

Azula gasps in pain before pivoting to the side and knocking the dagger out of Katara's hand with a round kick.

"Very impressive," she coos.

Katara turns around, hands forming into fists. She clearly wants to surprise Azula by whirling around and punching her. Zuko does not have time to yell, to warn her to _run _because Azula will never fight fair. He doesn't have time to tell her that you should never turn your back on his sister.

Azula turns, pulls one of the swords out of a guard's scabbard and then shoves it through Katara's back.

The end of the blade sticks out of the middle of Katara's chest, slick and red.

He sees blue, blue eyes. He sees her cough, sees blood dribble out from between her lips.

Zuko's waterbender falls to her knees and all the Prince of the Fire Nation can do is scream.

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

**:(**

**Please don't hate me forever. Also, there's one chapter and an epilogue next. Please let me know all your thoughts.**


	15. Slaughter

**And at once I knew I was not magnificent.**

**—"Holocene" by Bon Iver**

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

**While I realize that this installment is short, this chapter is very dark. Please keep that in mind as you read on.**

* * *

><p>Blood everywhere.<p>

Zuko sees Azula pointing to the guard to his right. "Drag her away. Take her down to the morgue."

Fury burns over every inch of Zuko's skin and he bolts forward, enraged eyes fixated onto his sister. She smirks at him. The remaining three guards fall on top of him, something is slammed into the back of his head and everything goes dark.

* * *

><p>Zuko's bedroom door is locked. He's banged on it, kicked on it, slammed his whole body into it; he can already feel his sides bruising with his efforts. Eventually someone shouts from outside for him to quiet down and Zuko cannot think. His thoughts are too clouded and he cannot feel the tips of his fingers. They are numb.<p>

Outside his balcony there are at least ten guards stationed in the garden, should he try to climb out of his bedroom that way. Zuko hisses through his teeth, a small, hot flame flicking out of his mouth. He can feel and taste and smell the smoke building up inside of his body, waiting to feel release.

Zuko can practically hear his Uncle's voice echoing inside of his own head. _Now is not the time to lose control of your inner being. You should close your eyes and calm yourself, or you will destroy everything around you._

Maybe Zuko should've listened to Uncle more when he was a child. Maybe he should have left with Uncle when the Dragon of the West abandoned his position as Prince Iroh and went to the Earth Kingdom. He could've left the throne and his birth right to his sister. She'd always wanted it, always lusted after it.

But then…but then he wouldn't have met Katara. And maybe it would've been better that way. Maybe she wouldn't be bleeding to death right now if she'd never met him.

"She's not dead," Zuko whispers out loud to himself. "I just have to find her."

He just has to find her.

His bedroom door swings open and in struts his sister, so full of youth and arrogance. Why hadn't he watched over Katara more? Why had he let the princess standing in front of him get her hands on his waterbender?

_Why?_

Zuko stills, eyes narrowing, as if he is a predator that has finally caught sight of his prey.

Azula's smirk fades. It is replaced by a smile, a gentle smile. A sisterly smile. "Honestly, Zuzu, you'll thank me for this one day."

He simply stares.

"Don't look at me like that. You were going to let some waterbending rat and her potential offspring run around with _royalty_. Pets are pets Zuko. They're to _remain_ pets."

He is shaking. "You didn't have to do what you did. She—Katara was leaving anyway. _She was leaving anyway_."

Azula crosses her arms and quirks an eyebrow. "And you wouldn't have followed? Zuzu, you're too possessive. I did what I had to do in order to keep this family from completely falling apart."

"You're_ insane_."

"No!" she barks, stepping forward, getting so close that she has to look up in order to keep eye contact with her brother. "I'm the only one who _cares_! You don't! You let the Project and everything that it stood for fall to the wayside so that you could run about with a volunteer! I'm the one who left and took down some of our enemies who were still wandering the streets! I'm the reason why our citizens still respect us! I'm the one who is protecting us. Not you, never you."

And then she laughs. It is a high, painful sound.

"Not that that didn't stop you from always being the favorite. Mother worshipped you—"

"Mother is—"

"She thought that I was a _freak_. And father…You kill one measly Admiral and suddenly he's falling at your feet like you're some _god_. Giving you control over the Project when you'd never cared about it, turning a blind eye away from your relationship with that…_He didn't even want me to kill her_!"

Zuko freezes, all the tension in his body making him feel as if he is going to explode. "What."

Azula's golden eyes move about the room frantically, but there is malice still embedded in her gaze. Malice and hatred and greed.

"He just wanted me to get rid of her. He said that we'd find another waterbender, one who wasn't such a nuisance. So he told me to take care of her. Which I did. Quite adequately."

Zuko's body feels cold and feverish at the same time.

"But do you know what the worst part is, brother? The worst part is that you took some plucky, ugly little waterbender out of the program with every intention of turning her into your own skewed version of a princess. The nobility would've been scandalized, of course, but think of how the lowly citizens would have reacted? Some would've found it romantic. You would be hailed as strong and merciful, to take pity on something like a waterbender. And where would that leave me? Nowhere with nothing."

Zuko has never seen his sister look so determined. " I'm not nothing," she says, voice low.

Zuko's sister slides a step back, suddenly calm and collected, as if they are discussing the weather or tea or servants.

"You should be thanking me for all I've done for you." Azula sniffs haughtily. "But you never will. You're such an ungrateful bastard, Zuzu. Not that I don't love you anyway."

Zuko spits and it lands on her cheek.

Azula wipes it off with the flick of one finger, lips curling up as if she's gazing at something unpleasant. "She gasped, Prince Zuko. She gasped like a fish out of water."

And then Azula turns her back on her brother.

Zuko springs, decision made a long time ago. He wraps his large hands around his sister's long, pale neck and snaps her head to the side. He can feel the bones breaking underneath his fingers.

Azula falls to the ground, limp and quiet. She is unconscious and Zuko watches as she struggles to breathe.

"Gasping like a fish," he repeats.

* * *

><p>Hatred and love reside in the same emotional spectrum. Sometimes one can be confused for the other.<p>

Zuko wonders if he ever loved his younger sister. He's starting to think that perhaps he's always hated her.

* * *

><p>It has been minutes. Hours, perhaps. And yet the guards standing outside of his door don't knock and question what is taking the Fire Princess so long. Zuko takes this as a benefit.<p>

He slides her body to the corner of his room so that he won't have to look at it. Azula's skin is cold underneath his touch.

And so he thinks about everything and nothing. Sometimes he feels numb, as if nothing can penetrate him in the fortress that he has created for himself. Sometimes he feels as if he can comprehend everything at once. Perhaps that's why he should shut down.

He holds up two fingers. "Two people," he whispers to himself. "I've killed two people." He wonders if it will stay at this number.

Probably not.

He does not bow his head and pray to Agni. The god that Zuko is supposed to worship does not strike him as a forgiving one.

Eventually he picks his sister's body up and places it atop his bed.

And then he sets his bed on fire.

* * *

><p>There is a commotion outside his door. Thick, black smoke is billowing everywhere and Zuko stands in the middle of his room, staring into nothing and completely unaffected.<p>

He hears shouts of pain and then suddenly his door is shoved open. Uncle Iroh is standing in his door way, a horrified look on his face.

"Prince Zuko, what have you done?"

And Zuko almost laughs, because if Uncle had only arrived hours earlier, then perhaps Katara would still be alive. Katara.

_Katara._

Zuko stumbles forward and Iroh catches him and Zuko can't help but feel like a child again, disappointed that his mother had abandoned himself and his sister.

His sobs.

No, he weeps.

Iroh is stroking his hair like he used to do when he was still around. "What have you done, boy?"

Zuko can barely get the words out. "She killed her." He repeats this again, several times, and Iroh briefly glances toward the bed.

He wonders how many people already know, or if it's just them. Certainly Ozai is sending soldiers to find him, to throw him in prison for high treason and the murder of a royal family member?

It is now that Zuko notices the scent of burning flesh permeating the air.

"She deserved it," Zuko finally says, swallowing. His throat is dry.

Iroh looks sad. Unbelievably, incomprehensibly sad. "My nephew, one day you will regret this. And that day will not be tomorrow. It will not be next month. It will not be next year. But there will come a day where you will regret what you've just done."

But Zuko knows in his heart of hearts that his Uncle is wrong.

* * *

><p>"They will be looking for you. We must be quick."<p>

Zuko wants to ask Iroh why he's doing this, why he's leading him away, why he's helping him. The question is on the tip of his tongue, but yet he cannot ask it. He's afraid that if he does, Uncle will stop doing what he is doing.

Zuko finds that he really doesn't want to be alone right now.

They're taking a shortcut through the corridors typically used by servants. They travel down the staircases, some passages barely lit by sconces on the walls. Zuko follows his Uncle without wondering where they're going.

And then Iroh is ushering him through another door. That is when Zuko finds himself in the palace morgue. It's reserved for servants, palace sages, and…and volunteers.

"Hurry up, Prince Zuko!" Uncle is already on the other side of the room, waving for Zuko to catch up.

Instead, Zuko turns and begins ripping white sheets off of the bodies. Most of the faces that he reveals are old and wrinkled, taken by age. Few others are young, taken by disease or murder. All have dead, lifeless eyes. None of these eyes are blue.

Zuko sways on his feet. He can't breathe; for a moment all he can do is think about the fact that Katara isn't here.

"She's not here."

Uncle already has his hands on his shoulders, steadying him. "Nephew—"

"She's not _here_." Zuko rips himself away from his Uncle's grasp, eyes wide with panic. With hope. "Katara's not here. I have—I have to find her and I have to find her _now_!"

Uncle is pulling on his sleeve. "Prince Zuko—"

"I have to find her! I have to find her—Katara—I have to make sure she's okay. She can't die on me, Uncle. She can't." Zuko's eyes feel hot. Everything feels hot and all he knows is pain.

Uncle's voice is much too soft. "Zuko, the waterbender wouldn't have survived that. She would've bled out."

"No." Something wet trickles down Zuko's cheek. "_No_. It's not fair. It's _not fair_." He sinks to his knees, knowing that he has to move, knowing that he's probably being searched for. Knowing that if Uncle is caught trying to help him escape…

He is breaking.

And then he is being engulfed in Uncle's embrace. "Loss scars us all deeply, my nephew. I'm afraid that even time will not heal your wounds, but you will learn to press on. Everything passes."

He is broken.

* * *

><p>The steady rise and fall of the ocean has stopped affecting Zuko. He sits in his cabin, dressed in commoner's clothes, with nothing but gray walls to stare at.<p>

Uncle enters his cabin with a bowl of rice. "Hungry?"

Zuko turns his face away, lips pressed together.

Iroh sighs. "You must eat, nephew. You haven't done so in two days."

Zuko remains silent.

Iroh clears his throat before holding out the rice once more. "If you eat, I will tell you where I am taking you."

Zuko rolls his eyes, mentally weighing the pros and cons of being stubborn. Finally he reaches out and takes the bowl from the older man, ignoring the relief crossing over his Uncle's face.

Iroh waits until Zuko takes a bite before he speaks. "The world is no longer in balance, Prince Zuko. It has not been for quite some time. Your father, my brother, is leading this world into destruction. The Spirits are angry with him. He must be stopped."

Zuko swallows his rice before shaking his head. "My father…"

But the words die on his lips. Ozai is responsible for Katara's… For Katara's…

Zuko cannot think it.

"Someone else must rule in his place," Iroh continues. "It is not too late for you, Zuko."

"Uncle, I murdered my sister. I'm pretty sure the Fire Nation doesn't want me anywhere near the throne."

Iroh sighs. "The world is not so black and white."

Zuko sets his barely eaten bowl of rice off to the side. "You still haven't answered my question. Where are you taking me?"

Iroh's expression goes serious, but his golden eyes light up. "My nephew, have you ever heard of the White Lotus?"

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

**Only the epilogue is left, and I have to admit I'm super excited about it. I hope you are too! It should be up super soon.**

**Just wanted to thank everyone who reviewed the last chapter and left me your thoughts, even if they weren't happy thoughts. I know this chapter wasn't too happy either, eep. But I just wanted to let you guys know that I love you all, even if you don't review. Thank you for reading my work, as flawed as it can be. I have the best readers in the whole wide world. :)**

**Let me know what you think if you feel so inclined. :D**


	16. Epilogue

**Lay back, lay back, go to sleep my man  
>Wipe the blood from you face and your hands<br>Forgive yourself if you think that you can  
>Go to sleep, go to sleep my man<strong>

**—"Go To Sleep" by The Avett Brothers**

* * *

><p>SIX MONTHS LATER<p>

* * *

><p>The whiskey burns as it runs down the back of Zuko's throat. It burns, and he thinks in the back of his mind that this all might taste a little bit like bitterness.<p>

The bartender is eyeing him curiously. Zuko can tell that she's working herself up to say something to him, so he turns his back toward her before she has the chance.

Honestly, he just doesn't _care_ anymore. About anyone or anything.

Except for, of course, the White Lotus.

He is useful to them. Willing to do their dirty work so that the old men can keep their reputations of being pure and just. They leave Zuko to the finding and the questioning and the disposing. And Zuko really doesn't mind as much as he should.

"Did you hear the news?"

The bartender has decided to speak up despite Zuko's obvious lack of interest. He turns his head toward her, lip curling a bit. "No."

The bartender smiles, not put off by his hostility. "Fire Lord Ozai and his new wife are expecting. There will be another heir to the Fire Nation throne."

"How wonderful." He taps the bar and she pours more whiskey into his glass.

"I wonder if it will be a boy? I bet he won't be as pretty as the one who killed himself by setting his bedroom fire." The girl clicks her tongue, eyes glazed over as if her mind is somewhere far and away. "Such a pity."

Zuko laughs, smile overwhelming his face. He tosses back the alcohol and then steps away from the bar, ignoring the girl's confused expression.

And that's when he spots_ him_ coming in through the entrance. The young man looks out of place with his boomerang strapped to his waist and his choppy haircut falling into his eyes. He scans the bar until he spots Zuko; his shoulders straighten and his expression turns professional, business like.

Zuko finds a table and soon the young man from the Water Tribe is sliding into the seat next to him.

Zuko disregards his outstretched hand. "Are you going to get yourself a drink?"

The young man pulls back his hand and clears his throat. "Uh, no."

"Suit yourself. Where's the kid?"

"My name is Sokka. Thank you for asking, I'm-Actually-Not-Dead-Prince-Zuko. Or, my personal favorite nickname of yours, Sister Slayer."

Zuko lays a white hot hand onto Sokka's shoulder, lips pressing together as the other man yelps in pain. "I don't like that nickname, is that clear?"

Sokka wrenches himself away from Zuko's grasp. "Crystal clear, buddy."

"Don't call me that either."

"Well, aren't you a barrel of fun."

"Where is the kid?"

The Water Tribe man is now poking at his fresh burn, pouting. Then he sighs and props an elbow on top of the table. "Did you really think I'd bring a twelve year old into a shady place like this? I thought this was the White Lotus, don't you guys normally meet in—"

"This was my preferred meeting place." Zuko gazes down at the empty table top despairingly. But he can't get up for a drink right now.

"Well, I hope you understand that as the Avatar's guardian, I felt that he was safer somewhere else."

Zuko resists the urge to groan. Uncle had warned him that he might try to do this. "If and when you bring the Avatar to the tea shop down the street tomorrow at noon, you will no longer be the Avatar's guardian. He will have a master earthbender, a master waterbender, and a master firebender all at his disposal, all of whom are perfectly capable of protecting him. Your services won't be required." Zuko frowns, recalling the words that Iroh had forced him to memorize and repeat. "But the Order of the White Lotus is forever in your debt. Thank you for finding the Avatar and bringing him to us."

Sokka blinks. "You sound very sincere."

"You can go back to your pile of snow now."

"Okay, well, I'm going to ignore that offensive jab toward my homeland so that I can say that I'm not going anywhere." Sokka takes in a deep breath, hesitant. "I'm looking for someone."

"Aren't we all."

"My sister ran away from home a long time ago."

Zuko snaps his head up, suddenly much more interested in the young man then he has been all evening. For the first time he takes in the detail of this man's facial features, the curve of his cheekbones, the shade of his skin…

His blue, blue eyes.

Zuko knows these eyes. He sees them all the time. His mind constantly conjures them in his dreams—not to haunt him, but to keep him sane. To keep him going.

The presumed dead Fire Prince swallows, trying not to allow any emotion to cross over his face. His hands squeeze into fists. "She could be dead, you know. The world is a hungry place."

Sokka, Katara's brother, shakes his head. "No. I'd…I'd know if she was gone." He pats his chest. "She's still around, off getting herself into trouble somewhere." His gaze shines with hope, hope that is nearly contagious.

Zuko gave up on hope a long time ago. A person can bleed to death in less than a minute.

"I'm going to find her," Sokka states, voice full of determination and resilience.

Zuko gave up on hope a long time ago. But he has not given up on finding things to live for. "In that case, I will help you find her."

* * *

><p><strong>AN:**

**The end.**

**…or is it?**

**All I'm going to hint at toward ****_that_**** subject is that if there is a desire for more, then there will be more. I like this world more then I should, I suppose.**

**Lots of hugs toward all of my readers. As I've stated before, you guys are basically the best. This is the third multi-chaptered story that I've completed in less than two years, and I have you guys to thank for that. If it wasn't for your constant encouragement and love and enthusiasm for this project then I wouldn't have been able to do this. Simple as that.**

**I've had this story stuck in my head for so long, it was nice to finally get it written out. I hope everyone liked this epilogue. Is it an end or is it a beginning? Perhaps it is both. :)**

**Review if you feel so inclined. I'm off to see ****_The Hobbit_**** in half an hour and look forward to hearing about your thoughts while I'm waiting for the movie. Thank you all for reading!**


	17. A note from the author

The sequel to this story has now been posted! It's called _Resting in a Raze_. Go check it out!


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